Hi, this is the 1st time I've posted about this particular problem. Last year I had Micro Vascular Decompression Surgery to treat Trigeminal Neuralgia. On the good side, it's cured me from that awful illness. But it came with a very high price. I leaked Cerebral Spinal Fluid many times after the stitches were removed and unfortunately I contracted Meningitis and a Staphylococcus infection within the Fluid. I was in the High Dependancy Unit for 2 weeks, where I also caught covid. Unfortunately I already have been suffering for many, many years from Chronic Migraine, Fibromyalgia, Asthma, Eczema and Systemic Sclerosis and in turn depression and anxiety.
I tried to take my own life in 2021 and very nearly succeeded. Since I've been out of hospital, basically all of this year I have suffered extreme anxiety and my moods aren't just low, I go to very dark places and it's been nearly impossible to stop myself from reaching for those pills again. I've had my antidepressants dose increased recently and about to start cbt.
I just need to talk to someone who has had a similar experience and understands how I am feeling. I feel like a total different person too, even down to taste changes. The Fatigue is so so awful.
I have a loving family, but I nearly got into an argument with my sister earlier this week. She wanted me to go over to our mum'sto sort out a lot of paperwork. I said i was too fatigued, but didnt actually have a migraine. But because she still defines me as 'just a chronic Migraine Sufferer '. I was having to justify my pain - both mentally and physically. Life is just unbelievably hard, and I don't like the new me.