Uncontrollable crying before bedtime

[Cakecrazy88]

My LO is 14 weeks old and I've noticed that every night just before her bedtime she starts crying uncontrollably and very loudly. Sometimes she refuses to feed until she's calmed down a bit. I don't get why she cries so much, she's usually a very happy chappy baby but everytime just before she is about to sleep, she will cry for an hour on and off. I don't know how to stop this or atleast reduce it. Can anyone give me any suggestions please?

[Lilli79]

I have twins, one is very placid and will just drop off the sleep, the other can be very noisy and tale ages to get off. They are 11 months so I think a lot if it is separation anxiety, but in fairness he's always been like that. I find that singing to him calms him down before he has his last bottle, and also reading them stories when they are in their cots. Sometimes they will fall asleep while I'm reading. I can't comment as every baby is different, but our problem was timing (and length of naps throughout the day). They would have to have naps at 9am, 12pm and 3pm for longer than 30 min otherwise they'd be very grumpy. They call pre bedtime 'the witching hour' - it can be awful, but don't worry they grow out of it very soon. Do you have a bedtime routine? (eg. bath, pj's, bottle, story). We found it helped ours a lot xx

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to Lilli79]

She's a very active baby during the day and it's hard enough getting her to sleep then lol! She usually has 10-15 min naps during the day, often soon after a feed. I haven't managed to set up a night time routine as such, just move to the bedroom,have the lights low, I try to read to her but she's still so wide awake that it's difficult to get that to settle her. When it comes to feeding I use a mix of bottle and breast to ensure she is full, it seems that helps her get sleepy. But the pre-witching hour is torture!!

[Lilli79 in reply to Cakecrazy88]

I know, it does get better though. I think we started a bedtime routine at about 3 months, then a daytime routine at 6 months when we started weaning them. I think the witching hour for us truly left after they started eating dinner as they get a little burst of energy afterwards so we just let them play until the night routine starts (usually 6.15pm, in bed at 6.45pm then asleep hopefully by 7.15pm). Mine will only nap at home in the morning, afternoon naps are normally out on a walk but we can trick them (put them in the pram and rock it til they fall asleep). Mine have never been great with naps, but they do get better and more consistent as time goes on. You can accept its the witching hour and it will pass, or try to get her to nap more (easier said than done!). It sounds like she is just tired at the end of the day.

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to Lilli79]

I've got a bedtime routine for her and it's clear that as soon as it gets to about 8ish the witching hour starts, like clockwork! I wish I could just relax her enough to give her a good feed so that makes her drowsy n then she can sleep. I don't want her going to bed on an empty stomach because then she ends up having more broken sleep.

[kt_11]

Sounds like if she’s only napping for 10-15mins at a time she’s probably over-tired by bedtime and a bit beside herself.

Have you tried the Huckleberry app? It helps guide you when the best time is for baby to nap based on awake times appropriate to their age. I’d use that to try work on naps, and also start to introduce a bit of a wind-down ‘routine’ at bedtime. She’s still very little to get into an actual routine but a series of things you do each night might help.

I remember when my boy was younger I didn’t read to him at night as it seemed to stimulate him rather than calm him down. I played him lullabied instead. x

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to kt_11]

Her naps add up to about 2 hours during the day. I've tried a wind down routine with her when it comes to her bedtime..soft music, change of room, low lights n yet nothing can calm her down. It's like 8pm hits n suddenly the crying starts n nothing will stop it. Usually I feed her n that helps her sleep but when she cries like this she doesn't even want to feed. It's like a vicious circle. I just wish I knew how to calm her down, I really struggle with that

[mrs_m_shizzle_dizzle]

Is she going a number 2 enough? When my little one hasn’t she has trouble at night but once she poos she is fab x

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to mrs_m_shizzle_dizzle]

Yea she goes once a day which is her norm.

[Hidden]

My little girl is like that on days when she only has power naps. She becomes over tired and can’t sleep at night. We are just making sure she gets proper sleeps during day. The don’t know how to handle over tiredness xx

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to Hidden]

Yea I think that is the case with my one as well. She just over tires herself n then can't get to bed. But then she doesn't even let me soothe her to sleep, or feed her..2 things which get her drowsy. What do you do to calm her down?

[Hidden in reply to Cakecrazy88]

Sounds exactly the same. We have something called organic gripe water and 2.5 mls seems to help and packing the floor. I’m just working hard at making sure she sleeps enough to avoid it if possible as it’s horrible seeing the getting so fraught xx

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to Hidden]

Yea it kills me when I see her cry like that and to feel like I can't help her is even more upsetting. I've given her gripe water on a few occasions, even that is a struggle to give her. But it gives her a little bit of relief, I've even ended up giving her a back massage to help if there is gas.

[precioce]

I would say that it does sound like she is overtired and I would move her bedtime forward and try and get to her before she gets to this point. Out little girl used to start crying after pyjamas were on as she was so tired and ready for sleep but wasn't good a self settling yet.

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to precioce]

Thank you so much. I will try that tonight. Her bedtime used to be past 11 back when she was 1 month old and slowly I have managed to bring it to 9pm

[precioce in reply to Cakecrazy88]

I remember those days!! Our little girl wouldn't be put down to sleep for so long and then she would start going down and we could introduce more of a routine. She was also rubbish at daytime napping until recently (although still rubbish when out) and would be soooooo tired come bedtime. I hope that helps out and you can have a more peaceful bedtime.

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to precioce]

Yea she just won't sleep during the day unless she's had a big feed or soon after her bath. But even that will only be for a short time. Will let you know how it goes tonight. Thank you for your help

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to Cakecrazy88]

So I decided to get her to sleep earlier, so started her bedtime routine early. I managed to get a good feed in before 8 which meant the crying wasn't as bad. And everytime she tried to cry, I just kept reading to her so she was forced to listen lol! Gave her another feed just before 9 and that finished her off. And she had slept loads yesterday during the day too...think the tiredness caught up with her or she just had the Monday blues

[doris92]

My little girl use to start crying about 7 o'clock until she went to bed around 9. She wouldn't take the bottle unless i walked round the house the min i sat down she would start crying again. I feel your pain its hard work i felt such a bad mum what was i doing wrong she was happy all day but evenings were horrible. She was just fighting her evening nap and getting over tired and worked up we've managed to get an evening routine now and she naps about half 6/ 7 o'clock and the crying has stopped. Took a while to get there we put her in the pram and it settled her loads xx

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to doris92]

Yea I feel like that as well,like she spends all day with me and she's happy n playful and then come a certain time late evening and it all changes. I've tried the pram with her but she doesn't settle in it much. I'm going to try and start her bedtime routine a bit earlier n see how that pans out. Once she's down, she sleeps for atleast 4 hours, if im lucky I'll get the first stretch as 6 hours. It's just getting her to sleep that seems the issue

[doris92 in reply to Cakecrazy88]

Took me a while but we got there and she's got such a good routine now she's a different baby in an evening now! Good luck i know how hard it is but you will get there its all trail and error xx

[Hidden]

Could it be colic? nhs.uk/conditions/colic/

[Joey89]

My 11 week old son is very colicky and does the same thing so every night before bed him and I have a bath together it helps relax him and calm him down also gets a little energy out as he loves to kick in the tub the. We get out he gets lotioned up and sometimes meds like gripe water or oval to help wit tummy cramps I put him in his love to dream sleep sac and he is happy and calm as can be.... and this is coming from a day or not wanting to nurse at all and having to resort to a bottle of formula in the day. He nursed all night after his bath

[JLew]

Over-tired possibly? I know my son gets awfully hard to put down at night when he is overtired. He has been teething since 7 weeks aswell. Could she possibly be teething as well? X

[Cakecrazy88 in reply to JLew]

Isn't 7 weeks a bit too early to start teething? She's not teething yet, I don't think. Just overtired.

[JLew in reply to Cakecrazy88]

No not at all in fact the doctors were the ones who discovered it also his teeth were right up to his gums. I thought it was way too early but all the signs were there. I myself teethed from 8 weeks old when I was a baby. Then my brother teethed the same and he had his first tooth by 4 months x