Post 713 Depression and acceptance my opinion 27 Nov 2020

[RoyceNewton]

Good Morning beloved ms family. I hope your American turkey day was good. Full of family and happiness. If it was not, Christmas and New Year is just around the corner, and that is an excellent chance to try again. Eventually “YOU” will get the hang of the Holidays. Relax, it is okay if it takes a while. In fact, it is very okay if everything takes a little longer these days.

“YOU” and I are now SICK. It is something that we may not be happy with, it is something that we are angry and upset about, but it just is. I do not know why me or why “YOU”, It just is. It happens to human beings, I am a human being. So it can happen to me and “YOU”. It just is, I have no choice but to adapt to it and make my life as good as I can. I personally do not believe in anti-depressants. I am not depressed. Pissed off, angry maybe. Depressed NO. “YOU” and I must adjust our dreams and ambitions to our new reality, OUR reality. NOT the story our doctor, family, society, in general, tells us lies ahead of us. NO, we must strive to make our reality one of our choosing.

I have had this disease for over 20 years. Exactly how long I am not sure. I could pin it down and work it out but I do not. I honestly do not care, it happened back then. I was told I would be in a wheelchair in a few months, and dead soon after. I certainly am not and I have nothing to do with that individual anymore. My choice, again my choice. As it is your choice to cry kick a bag and be upset. It is your choice.

One day, “YOU” will come to terms with this condition. It may take time, YOUR time. Mine took a lot of tears. I am proud to say that after 20+ years now I merely get teary eyes but my heavy crying has subsided. I am not sure it will ever go away, I suppose that is part of the human condition. I am not sure that I have accepted it. ms just is. It is something that I continually adjust too and I have no choice but to accept this. “YOU” my dear ms sibling do as well. Take your time, do not rush yourself. This condition will be with us until we pass. Read that as forevermore. It is NOT impossible to live with, it takes time and adjustments. “YOU” face before “YOU” a new journey. One that “YOU" never expected let alone planned for, BUT it is there now. Your new reality, a sharp left turn in your journey of life, NOT an impossible obstacle.

“YOU” can live with ms, others do and have, but they do not matter. What matters is “YOU” and only 
“YOU,",and “YOU” Can do this. “YOU” can live an ms life. This journey is yours. Nobody else’s, but “YOU” are not traveling alone. Others are on this journey. Reach out and ask for help when “YOU” need it. Depression and loneliness do not have to b your life.

I will start by saying “G’DAY BRO”, “YOU” do not have to say it back, I will not be hurt but your feelings are understood. TOU my ms sibling, are not alone. We are here with “YOU”. ms is NOT a journey that “YOU” have to go through alone, there are others on this journey and they are saying “YOU CAN DO THIS.

Royce ( your ms writer and Brother)

YOU can do ms, let yourself do ms. Take your time it will come

[carolek572 CommunityAmbassador]

Keep Smiling, Royce, and I will do the same!

[Tulip77]

Thank you Royce. I am having a HARD time right now. I still find it hard to just say that I have MS. I’m getting there on that one, but I am realizing how far reaching this disease is and that is what I am really upset about. I don’t know how long I have had it. I can look back pretty far 10-15 years maybe and guess, but the changes that I have experienced in the last 12 months are pretty drastic.

I need to figure out what my limitations are and how I am going to deal with my job. I have to work. Without my job, my kids and I don’t eat and I loose my health insurance, but it is taking me much longer to do my work and I have to go back over things A LOT to insure accuracy. I feel very defeated at times.

I don’t like the holidays- too much work for what it is. I would rather order take out then spend so much time in the kitchen. My family can enjoy each other over any food, it doesn’t have to be this special dinner. I am expected to do most of it and yes, it’s yummy, but it’s too much pressure at this point and I have spent the last week dreading it.

My rant is over. Take care ~

[RoyceNewton in reply to Tulip77]

NO NO, your rant is okay, if not here, then where. My unsolicited opinion can work make adjustments for you. Legally some I think they have to. Takeout for thanksgiving and Christmas are okay, do not put so much pressure on yourself. Children may b e a little disappointed but they will cope. Believe me, they will. Take it a little easier on yourself, you can d this just give yourself time and be willing to fail. It is okay, honest it just may take a little time. Go easy on yourself, YOU CAN do ms.

[Tulip77 in reply to RoyceNewton]

My employer is wonderful and will help in any way. My concern is the quality of my work. My position is an important one and we are a small company so there are not other positions available. I am training someone that can help with some of my responsibilities.

My kids are old enough that they would not mind a menu change, but my elderly father would. He would go along with it begrudgingly. He looks forward to it all year and it takes him back in time to fonder days. I get it and want to be able to do that for him, but it’s HARD on me. The stress of having everything come together; family drama; my anxiety and now just total scatter brain.... well, it’s a struggle. Last year was super hard and I couldn’t figure out why. Now I know.

[RoyceNewton in reply to Tulip77]

As hard as it may be, it is our lot to face it and come through, maybe battered and bruised, but come through it with a smile on the other side. Good luck and my best wishes for you and yours always

[twooldcrows]

was a nice time yesterday for my son and grand daughter came over and of course his girlfriend ...we had a great time visited lots ...my grand daughter had been gone going to college to it was really nice to see her been since august ...she is a sweety ....really enjoyed the day and of course the food ...hope everyone else also had a great Thanksgiving yes was not as usual but ha still was great ....love and happiness....well said Royce and i bet you had a wonderful day ....

[RoyceNewton in reply to twooldcrows]

I did have a very good day with family, thank you very much.

[twooldcrows]

that is wonderful....enjoy life ...

[Amore55]

Glad you pointed out that not taking an anti depressant is simply YOUR choice. I personally DO take 2 of them, one helps with pain. Whatever one decides, it is OUR decision. No one here should ever try to dispense medical advice or even what may be misconstrued as medical advice.

[RoyceNewton in reply to Amore55]

as always consult YOUR doctor, I am not one and certainly not yours, as I said my opinion

[Tazmanian]

Enjoy