My MSAA Community
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Funeral

So cuz my service dog is not welcome at my moms funeral - i am not going.

47 Replies
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What?!!!! This can't be.

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I know right?!?!? It became such a fight between my sister and i that i just said i will stay home.

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Wow. This is cruel. I'm so sorry. I thought it was illegal to disallow service animals.

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It is illegal. Its not the funeral home saying this its my family.

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Oh my goodness. 😭😡Thats like telling a paraplegic "sorry no wheelchairs allowed". Shame!

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Exactly! I knew she didnt believe me that i had MS wen i was first diagnosed. But i thot she had come around to accepting it. Apparently not. And wen i try to talk to my dad she wont let him speak

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It's the last time you will see your mother, and to most of us, funerals are part of a healthy grief process. You have as much right as anyone else to be there.

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Alzheimers took my mom years ago and i did a lot of grieving then. I wanted to be there for my dad so he wud not feel alone and isolated.

But my sister is alienating the rest if the family from my dad so she can keep him to herself.

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That's very sad, but sounds familiar. Hugs

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More familiar these days than any of us wud like i know

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I was thinking that also.

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WOW, I would go anyway, and let your sister make the scene. But easier said than done. You have my empathies. We don't choose our families, friends we do. You have many here who support you. Be good to yourself with great care.

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I can’t believe you family would deny you of this!! I’m just so shocked. I’m so sorry. 😢😢😢😢

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Midgey_Midge06 I am very sorry that someone made it a point to not allow your very needed service dog at your mom's funeral....how VERY awful of them to do such a thing. Do they not understand the laws that your dog is ALLOWED to be there!?! I am so very sorry for your loss and for this person(s) behavior!

Jessie

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Thank u. Its ridiculous really. My fiancé is going to go to the ADA with it.

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And its my very own sister saying this. She says my dad doesnt want my dog there but wen i tried to talk to him she talked over him and it became a screaming match

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I am so sorry <3 I can't believe your sister is telling you that you can't bring your service dog. Part of me would want to show up anyways, with the dog. I mean, too bad. I will never ever understand some people and I'm sorry they are doing this to you <3

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My oldest sister is upset abot it as well and now she wont be going to the funeral either. So thats half the family now not being there cuz she is being unreasonable. But my dad is allowing it so ... there ya go.

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Ugh. Family is so dang complicated! I have a very difficult daughter and it is easier sometimes to just let them have their way then attempt to fight them. I wonder if your dad just doesn't want to take her on? I'm sorry she's doing this to your family.

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Thats exactly what i think is happening. Under normal circumstances my dad wud not even care.

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I am so sorry that's beyond cruel xxx

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Midgey_Midge06 can you and your other sister go to the funeral home together to see your mum and not tell anyone what you are doing. That way at least you get to see her before the casket is closed, and it may give you some kind of closure. I would just show up at the funeral anyway, be bold and be strong, have the confidence knowing that your mum would want you there. Wait until the last moment and make an entrance that way your misguided sister will only embarrass herself if she makes a todo over your dog being there. My thoughts and prayers are with you, hugs Jimeka 🦋 🤗

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I dont want there to be a scene. I will go spend time with my dad in June wen my fiancé is off work and can take me up there. I was going more for him than anything else

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I am sorry that your sister is being a fool ok I decided to be nice about that. But I really think you should if it’s not to late to call the funeral home and go there before everyone else does have you and your other sister and your fiancé oh yes your dog go and say good bye to your mom they can not kick you out.

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The funeral home wud be ok with that. But now its become a logistics problem. My sister Pam has cancelled her flight and me going up there was already an issue that we had carefully planned out including me and Pam staying at my dads and my evil sister bringing me home cuz its a 3 hour drive.

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Oh well that doesn’t sound good at all. I guess your not going to make it that is really too bad. I wish there was a way that you could go. Your evil sister as you say she will get hers is there a way you could let an aunt know why you will not be attending you and your other sister will not be there. You know the aunt that likes to talk if you know what I mean.

I hope all works out well for you and your family.

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Physically if you can endure it, it would mean alot to you and your dad.sometimes I pretend to tattoo "stupid" on peoples forhead and go on and do what I want to.Just a thought.....

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Who told you that one? I would call the funeral hope. Do they not know it is service dog. Your dog will be the best one there

Don't get me going. You need to go to your Mom's funeral you need closure and show up with your dog what are they going to touch him. We all know how that will go.

I know I am repeating myself but show up there and go. She's your mother to.

Ok I'm done.

Sorry for the lose of your mom. I will say a prayer for you and your mom and your dog.

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I’m so sorry for your loss. Your sister is being cruel. I agree with what jimeka suggested.

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Ah sweet girl, you go anyway!💕 It isn't up to your sister if you go. It's your choice!💕 Midgey_Midge06

You have every right to be there!

~Hugs n Luvs ~

J 🌠

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So sorry for your loss. But your sister only wins if you and your other sister allow it. If the funeral home allows it she can’t stop you. We only have one mother in life and no one can take that away.

You and your other sister deserve the blessing of telling your mother good bye.

God bless you and don’t give up

Donnie

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No aunt. But once my brother finds out - all hell is gonna break lose

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I know we have been talking but I just have to say this don't let her win this I know it's not a game but for some reason she thinks it is . She has no right to be the one to do this talk it over with your other. Sister you must have other relatives that can help you out with transportation. Try to make this work for you, your other sister and your Dad. You will feel better seeing your mom.

Good luck to all of you.

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I have been going back and forth. My fiancé said he wud still come get me and make sure i get home. I just dont know how long i wud be there and i wud be stuck in a hotel room while he worked.

Its a long drive and the stress i am under just thinking abot it has caused the dreaded Hug to come back, my bladder has slammed shut, my speech is messed up and i am having vertigo issues. The scene that wud be made at the funeral home might push me into a full on relapse. I am not on any DMT rite now cuz of just getting over pneumonia.

It all just sucks. So i am just gonna go to church, have them help me talk to my mom in heaven, pray on it and hope some day my dad will forgive me.

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You know what is best for you but it you should talk with your Dad before the funeral so he under stands what is going on with you, your health, and you sound like a very caring person and you don’t want to upset your Dad. Just I don’t know how you would tell him that your sister is being a pain in your ass opps I said that with out really saying that. But you know what I mean. It sounds like your sister is trying to look like she is being the good daughter and you and your other sister aren’t. But you know how she works and your mother also knows. So don’t let her bother you if you have a way to go to the funeral do it I like to be a fly on the wall when you show up there with your dog and you standing nice and strong and you need to get some one to say you look so good LOL go for it.

Good luck to you. 🙏🏼🙏🏼

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Thank u. My minister said to write my dad a letter so i may do that. I think my dad knows i want to be there

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That would be a good thing to do it sounds like your in a good place. Which is good because you don’t want this to mess up your health just relax and do what you feel like you should do. You have your dog, your fiancé’s, your minister and once you write your Dad you’ll have him but you already have him. He is going through a lot because he lost his soul mate, and you lost your mom so now is the time to grieve and take it easy. I will send prayers your way.

Sandra

Aka ssdw1958

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Thank u

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Midgey_Midge I am outraged to hear how mean your sister is being! But after thinking awhile I totally agree with ssdw1958 that you really need to take care of yourself. I’m sure your mom would want that too. ❤️

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Sorry to hear of your loss. I'm praying about the whole situation, and for peace over your family. In Jesus' Name, Amen. Take care and God bless you.

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The power of prayer is the best gift ever. Thank u 😘

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That is really sad! you have a service dog for a reason!!! I am sorry this is happening to you. I would not tell her a thing and show up anyway!

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I am sorry for your loss.I think legally they couldn't stop you...

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Midgey_Midge06 my heart aches for you and the situation you've been put in. If you do not go, perhaps you could do something by yourself to honor your mom's memory. Have a cup of tea, or a glass of wine, and do something you and your mom used to enjoy.

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It does sound like there is no good answer. You don’t want to push yourself into full blown relapse. Your mom would understand and I bet your dad will too. Maybe let it all go for now and spend time with your dad later and explain it all to him.

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This is absolutely despicable. I'd go anyway. This is your mother, for goodness sakes! Who could be more important to be there other than you? And if anybody doesn't like it, too bad!Shame on your sister and anyone else who thinks that because you are disabled and need a service dog that you should not be at your own mother's funeral!!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you, Midgey.

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I am so sorry that you are in such a terrible situation Midgey_Midge06. I know that you must and will make your own decision about what to do. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you journey through this very emotional and difficult time in your life. May God and His angels comfort and console you as you grieve the loss of your mother.

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