need to know

[tagurit]

Does anyone else struggle with need to know obsessions. Here's an example: when I was 11 years old, I would constantly google "hobbies for girls", I would go up to the 20th page on google as I felt I was missing out on something and I needed to know everything about the topic. Speaking from a logic stance, that is impossible. But of course, OCD is like "Are you sure, you're done googling? What if you missed something?" Although I googled the topic, I google it again and will find myself reading the same websites because its like "but what if there was something important that was there" I will seriously go up to the 20th page on google. I even have a document of 300 pages of things that I have to google. The only thing stopping me is that I have finals that I need to study for, but I'm so not looking forward to winter break.

And this isn't like normal googling things out of curiosity, its googling things out of fear/reduce anxiety.

[Hidden]

I struggle with the "need to know" obsession.

I google to find information about anything, and it can become a compulsion.

I keep looking for more details, and it becomes endless.

I do it since I have lots of anxiety about it.

It is like having urges to look for more information.

I also get the OCD thought that I have to do more research, otherwise something important will be left out.

I had learnt in therapy to resist the compulsion, and sit with the anxiety, of the feared consequences.

I know this is not easy.

I am struggling with this on a daily basis.

[TPebble]

I do also. The compulsion takes A LOT of time. Sometimes I even reread entire articles multiple times just in case I missed something, but it could be about as random as the family tree of pears.

I practice refocusing into whatever I actually need to do in my life (studying, cleaning up, etc), but know I always feel like I have less hours in a day than a person without OCD because of the time I end up spending doing "thorough research" that really doesn't help me achieve any of my goals.