Greetings from a web drifter.

Hello,

As the subject says, a drifter. Found this website from another post, I suppose an introduction is recommended.

I am 21 years old, doing nothing at the moment.. was in Britain but ran away lying to mental health people in Portsmouth that I wanted a fresh start in another country and university. Currently waiting for replies from these universities.

Not British, North American, Russian European, Chinese, or any other nice recognised country. Instead I'm from country right next to dubai in the middle east.

Sadly, I don't belong here. Drastically different in every walk of life from people this part of the world, from religion to favorite snacks. Which means I am isolated, even from family.

Always wanted to move somewhere else, but everywhere else I have to "prove" that I am different. I have to explain myself. Still..Can't stay here. So I'm trapped in a lonely gray area.

Mental health issues? depression of some intensity, social anxiety, some personality disorders, syndromes and whatever else that was not diagnosed. spent two an a half months in a mental ward under section, meaning I wasn't allowed to leave.

Whatever issues I have are not serious..thousands or millions have more to deal with. Thousands or millions harmed themselves worse. I'm nothing special.

Which is one problem I have really.. I want to be unique so badly I...seek it in such negative environments. But I'm not. I'm not smart, I'm not cute, or fun to be around..but others are worse..So I can't complain..

I'm between average and terrible, which means I'm forgettable. And being someone who wishes I was someone big I suffer from it all.

But nothing I say will change it. I'll die someday from either old age or suicide and be stuffed in a hole never to be remembered. And nothing people say makes my chest feel or move. It's all the same.

I apologise for the long introduction.

Goodnight.

[denvajade]

Hi there. I am sorry you feel soooo bad!

Life is hard when one suffers mental health issues, just trying tomlive with ourselves let alone live with anyone else. Are you on Meds? Do you live alone? Do you work? I have come to learn thru my turbulent life that it is only me who can control what happens and how I feel, it's not easy and I have very bad days but work thru them. Can I suggest you try and meet some people you feel comfortable with and TRY to get more out of life, a reason to wake up get up etc..

Wishing u well

[Rick1on1]

Hi Aeinhardt,

Realising that you are 1 of 7.5 billion people is quite daunting for many. It certainly makes me feel small and insignificant.

However, realising that you can make a difference in the lives of people or the environment can bring pride and the sense of achievement that you are lacking.

Start taking small steps towards helping other people, animals or the natural world. One day you may even meet someone who can be your life partner and have a family. This will be your opportunity to nurture them differently to what you experienced.

By posting here, you have already taken the first step. Now, you need to take the next to a prepare a better existence for those that will come into your life.

Hope this helps?

Rick1on1

[WhiteAlice]

But you are unique. We all are. You're very isolated. You could use some recognition. Stick around here.