Confusion with counsellors: Why is it... - Mental Health Sup...

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Confusion with counsellors

Dani17 profile image
26 Replies

Why is it that I don't want a counsellor?#

Just asking for possible reasons...

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Dani17 profile image
Dani17
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26 Replies

Hello

Looked at both of your letters. You need to see your GP and discuss your way forward.

BOB

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to

So it isn't something I can do by myself?

secondhandrose2 profile image
secondhandrose2 in reply to Dani17

The trouble with trying to sort things out by ourselves is that we tend to go around in circles - the way we think and understand things is a part of us and it is difficult to see when we are locked into repetitive thoughts whereas someone else brings a different perspective. That's why counselling and therapy can be useful. x

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to secondhandrose2

Thank you I'll reconsider my options :)

trekster22 profile image
trekster22

You're scared of being judged (change counsellers if you feel this is happening), you're not ready to face your problems, you dont want to become dependent on someone else (they make sure that doesnt happen if they're good), you're scared of change (for me it's PTSD and autism related)

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to trekster22

I am surprised at how much you just summed me up :'( thank you, I needed to hear it - it is so true.

Bless you

trekster22 profile image
trekster22 in reply to Dani17

Anytime ive had the same anxiety over getting a counsellor. ive had to pay for mine and ive had some abusive ones in the past.

One problem depressives suffer is that they do not look outside the box and they end up been frightened of change. Change can be confusing we wish to move on it is not easy to be positive when we are low, and we always feel we are going to fail. We need to be brave and it is that we have problems when achieving a positive outlook.

Do not make the fear of failing prevent you from making that change. My life was limping along over a long extended period, the changes I needed to take were hard and difficult. When I decided eventually to make those changes my life changed for the better and that gave me encouragement

Change does not need to be so life changing, make these alterations slowly in little bits so you can alter the outcomes at given times.

BOB

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to

That makes it seem a little easier Thank you

troy2 profile image
troy2

Hi there, I am a counsellor at moment coming off 10 mgs citalipram hence why i am on this site. i see this all the time depression etc are illnesses that can be treated. we don't teach people to look after mental health also early help will mean you will get better sooner. i suggest you see several counsellors, ask for free assessment session or reduced rate. the most important factor in counselling is the relationship, find someone accredited but also someone you feel safe and relaxed with.

you will not be judged only helped to recover more quickly.

good luck.

i broke my arm so excuse typing with one finger.

Dani17 profile image
Dani17

Sorry to hear about the arm :/ ... financial struggle wasn't something I had considered... if it too much money then I will not do it.

I certainty appreciate you helping me with this ... please take care and I wish you a speedy recovery.

Maybe you've talked about things previously with other people and felt it got you nowhere or maybe you were misunderstood etc. But maybe they weren't the professional that you needed to speak with...

Maybe you're scared of saying the whole truth because you're not sure what their reaction will be.

Maybe you just cant imagine how it will possibly help/cure you...

i don't know...you tell us. What pops into your mind when you picture yourself sitting with a counsellor. What would you want to talk about? And what would you not want to talk about?

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME

In all honesty I don't know and I won't know until I start going I guess ... I guess I fear being judged or what effect bringing up the past will have on me :(

KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME profile image
KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME in reply to Dani17

Its the one place you wont be judged. And if you were, report them, because they're not doing their job properly then lol. I know its hard...some things i brought up during therapy and was asked to talk about in front of a group was sexual abuse as a child. This made my skin crawl...but i did it. You can do it!

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME

That'll be the hard one fo me :/

KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME profile image
KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME in reply to Dani17

...maybe try talking about it here first. Somewhere where its not face to face. On a personal message maybe. And the person doesn't even have to comment-maybe you could just practice saying what you remember/feel etc

KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME profile image
KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME in reply to Dani17

I'm sorry you're struggling

KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME profile image
KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME in reply to Dani17

<3

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME

The problem is that I don't remember it ... Its hard to say but I could definatly use some professional guidance on that (but thats all I'll currently say on the matter if you don't mind) :) x

KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME profile image
KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME in reply to Dani17

Yes thats fine. More than fine x

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME

Bless you for your understanding :3 x

KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME profile image
KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME in reply to Dani17

Sometimes...thats all we need x

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to KNOW_OCD_MOR_THAN_ME

That's true .... Be well x

Hey

You have two people on your shoulders

One is the bad and one is the good. The bad one does not want you to see a counsellor as it will make you better and the good one will win and you will feel better.

By going to a counsellor you will drag things up from the past, stuff you have hidden, but by bring it up you face it and learn now to deal with it. This all helps the good one to win the battle

Craig

Dani17 profile image
Dani17 in reply to

That imagery actually helped thank you ... But I don't want to bring the past up I don't think I can :(people even mmentioning it makes me.physically sick

Hey, I no it's hard to bring up the past, but with a good doctor they make you understand it and deal with it. Then you put it to one side, and you see that it's nothing and you have overcome it as you are here in the now.

It's early so don't know if that makes sense, I hope so.

Craig

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