rachael

[rachaelbennett37]

i just wish i could feel normal.. i push everyone away.. never ever feel happy. just sad scared and helpless

[MarkQ]

Hi Rachael,

Wanting to feel, to be 'normal' is.....normal!

The problem is knowing what we mean by or perceive as being 'normal'.

It's easy to look at the people around us and like assessing a book by it's cover make all kinds of assumptions about them, how much 'better' their life appears, how they seem to cope better, be better, be happier etc unfortunately this is not an accurate, healthy or particularly helpful place to start.

(That said it is 'normal', so from that prospective alone you are not 'not normal')

There's is not a lot of information in your post (which is fine) but it limits any response.

You do say that you 'never feel happy. Just sad scared and helpless', so let's start there....

Feeling as you do is not great but there are things you can do and there are people who can and will provide support.

Do you know how long you have felt this way and if these feelings were triggered by any particular event?

Have you spoken to anyone about how you feel? (close family or a good friend can be a good place to start, although not necesseraly the easiest to be completely open and honest with, at least in the beginning).

The one place you can easily access support is via your GP. It's a secure environment in which you can start to explore how you are feeling and for them to provide access to a range of options to help.

The help/support best suited for you will be down to specifics but if you can approach seeking and accepting help with an open mind, you will be off to a good start.

it's important that you not be too harsh on yourself, know you are an individual of value, you can be happy and you can overcome times / situations in your life that are difficult. You do not need to do this alone.

There are times in our lives we all need support and the healthiest thing we can do is seek and accept that as readily as we would act to support someone we cared about in need of our assistance.

Posting in here is a good place to start and you will find a community that want you to be everything you can.

If you are able to provide more details of your circumstances that would be useful in offering a more focused response. This is a safe place but take your time and publish / respond as you become confident to do so.

In the meantime, I do wish you all the very best.

[madelaine in reply to MarkQ]

Your help will be much appreciated. So, what do I do next? my whole life has been turned upside down. After routine blood tests, my husband has advanced bowel cancer which has spread to his liver and lungs. His treatment is palliative care only. End of life _ how do I cope with this how do I cope with his feelings- what should I do. Please help me m

[madelaine]

sorry to hear this. I am the same. I do not want to talk to anyone, all I want to do is curl up in my duvet and never talk to anyone again. I cant remember the last time I felt happy. I am scared, upset and lonely. I am helpless too My husband aged 57 has been diagnosied with advanced bowel cancer and it has gone to his liver and lungs and they are treating him with palliative care. Maybe we can get through our crisis together. Maybe we can chat, if you want of course, maybe we can take our feelings by the horn and, well, whatever