Feeling very low and anxious today.

[GlasgowNeil]

Still not sleeping well, chronic headache and very tense shoulders. I have an informal meeting with my manager today. I feel really anxious about it. Despite him saying it is a welfare meeting and a 'chat', it feels more designed to pressurise me into resigning. This meeting is just making me feel worse!

[jules2105]

Hi Neil

I know how you feel I really worry when I have to see work too. My best advise would be to write yourself some notes for the meeting of how you feel and any concerns and If possible take someone with you to the meeting

Jules x

[GlasgowNeil in reply to jules2105]

Hi Jules, thanks for this. I was planning to take someone to the meeting but I've been told I can't as it's an informal chat!

[jules2105 in reply to GlasgowNeil]

Hi Neil

That's not very understanding of them, I burst into tears when I see work too and then tell myself at least they can see how poorly I am. Don't worry if you get upset in the meeting and if it is too much tell them you feel poorly and need to rearrange.

Jules x

[GlasgowNeil]

Also as a result of the pain my thoughts are really anxious. I keep worrying I'll lose my job, girlfriend, house. Then I get overwhelmed with horrible gut-wrenching feelings of loss. I'm trying to not follow these thoughts, be mindful, but it's incredibly difficult at the moment. I keep bursting into tears.

[Jamie186 in reply to GlasgowNeil]

Hi GlagowNeil This is our first chat, hope it will be helpful. When your going through a period of stress the thing's you've mentioned seem to take on greater proportions (especially if it's work related) then the stress builds up, and so on. I'm answering your post which is 4 hours old and hopefully your meeting will have finished and you, will know it was nothing to worry about.

I once was given these pearls of wisdom by a fellow sufferer of depression, and I have alway's kept them in my mind, he said "" If you worry about something you think may happen, and it does,n't. You have worried for nothing. If you worry, and it does happen, you'll worry all the more and you will have worried twice about the same thing. what a waste of a worry.. Hope that makes sense as there seems to be a lot of W's there.

GlasgowNeil I really hope your problems get sorted out straight away, and no more worrying

My best wishes

Jamie.

[Hidden]

Hello

What a way to go back to work, all this can lead to further concerns and worry for you. they never make it easy for you and others.By ramping up the worry you feel when this sort of meeting takes place.

All I can suggest is stay calm and remember it is your health you are dealing with.

All the very best of luck

BOB

[GlasgowNeil in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Bob, appreciate your support.

[gardengnome]

do make your own notes about what is said / agreed in the meeting. And if you are asked to sign a statement you do not agree with, then ask him to re-write it before you agree to sign.

[Suzie40 in reply to gardengnome]

I'd be questioning why you can't take someone with you. That seems very unreasonable. How about saying that you're worried about your anxiety causing you to forget parts of the meeting. Or you could ask if it would be ok for you to record the meeting? If you're not comfortable with that, ask your manager to take minutes. At the end of the meeting, have a read through and if you're in agreement with the points covered, you can both sign it x

[Gambit62]

Guess that you have probably had the meeting by now - or are out at it. Really hope it went well and that you managed to make notes on it as Gardengnome suggested.

[GlasgowNeil in reply to Gambit62]

Had meeting, Manager made notes and said he would send me them. Feel exhausted now.

[Gambit62 in reply to GlasgowNeil]

Not surprised you are feeling tired - it really was stressing you.

Hope you feel better soon.

[GlasgowNeil in reply to Gambit62]

Hi Gambit, thanks. I suspect it's going to be quite a long road to feeling better! At the moment I just wish I could get a better nights sleep

[Hidden in reply to GlasgowNeil]

Hi GN, my sleep tricks include listening to the BBC world service on my phone - that will send anyone to sleep!

[Jamie186 in reply to GlasgowNeil]

Good so stop worrying, and deal with it when you have the notes. Get your head down, have a kip, and wake up refreshed and you'll be ready to deal with the world..

Jamie

[Hidden]

Hello

It sadly is all down to the bottom line, we have disabled rights, only on occasions if it does not inconvienience that bottom line, PROFIT.

Many companies like to take on disabled staff as long as it looks good on the books and they can be selective with someone who will not need hospital appointment.

[GlasgowNeil]

Thanks ever so much for all the comments and advise everyone. It's good to not feel alone in all this but difficult as I feel so low and overwhelmed.

[Photogeek in reply to GlasgowNeil]

Neil don't make any decisions under duress. Jamie is quite right, if your Depressed now with a job? What would it be like to be unemployed. So don't think about resigning without taking advice. You have a legal right

To be free from Discrimination. Stop worrying and get some sleep,

What is your girlfriend saying about all your troubles, is she supportive? As that would be a great help.

Hannah

[Jamie186]

You may wrong and your anxiousness is making you feel he want's you to resign. If he felt that don't you think he would have done that before now. What ever your thinking "Don't" resign, think long and hard, and take expert advice

Best wishes

Jamie