I have a difficult situation I was in an abusive relationship for about a year and the harassment and intimidation has carried on for over 10 years.
My son has been diagnosed with autism and is awaiting ADHD assessment though the school, GP, Single Point of advice, peadtrician all made it extremely difficult to get a referral to the CHAMHS clinic as I believe they did not want to recognise it and or treat it because of either complexities with my sons health or deterring applying for ECHP.
Due to the lack of support and abuse from Ex partner I have developed PTSD and the care in need plan was not being carried out as me and peadiatrics agreed to escalate the process due to my anxiety and difficulty with my sons behaviour (not to mention how unfair it is on him) now my ex partner is trying to take custody of my son saying I am an unfit mother because I have lost my tether and shouted at my son in school and because on several occasions I had to push for tests which discovered my son is anemic and that he had a raised TSH ( I am hypothyroid) I have been since my early twenties and also had anemia as a child. None of the professionals took me seriously even when I said my son getting continuously dizzy pale and out of breath. He now has intermittent chest pains but they deny any thyoid problem as each tests were not done under the right conditions only one TSH was raised though I have been diagnosed with hypothyroidism years ago. There are also heart problems in my family.
So because I have argued my concerns with health professionals and the PTSD and slow unsupported/untreated health problems of me and my son they are putting me forward for a child protection plan even though I was not given any early help or any strategies given on the child in need plan.
This seems incredibly unfair to me and has anyone else experienced this?
Many thanks
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Stace268
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Hi. You do not say that your son has learning disabilities alongside his Autism? This group supports mainly on learning disability so the National Autistic society or an autism group on Health unlocked might be better placed to help you.
Having said that, you could apply for an EHCP for your son yourself if you feel his needs are not bring met in school, it doesn't have to be the school that applies.
Your partner won't be awarded custody of your son on the basis of a single occasion of you shouting at him at school or because you insisted on some tests.
I am surprised that your son isn't already on a Child protection plan given that there is a history of domestic abuse and ongoing harassment in his life. A Child Protection plan is a good thing, hopefully it will keep him safe and ensure that his needs are being met and that he has the opportunity to thrive. It should mean extra support for you too, so keep and open mind and engage with whatever is offered and hopefully things will get improve for you all. Good luck. 💐
He does have learning disabilities, I thought most people know that autism is linked to that whether social or literary etc.It w
Is not a husband we were barely together a year and harassment has been 10 years plus.
I was supposed to be offered early help but nothing happened and I've shouted at him twice but what parent doesn't plus one of the occasions was when I was in a violent relationship, the school and council have dettered me from applying for ECHP so it's not been an easy ride!
My son hates being questioned by SS so I do not see it as a positive and they've written that my son is at risk of significant harm in my care because no one would refer him for ADHD assessment and I've struggled, some of the things his doing are dangerous!
Their service and the reports needed will be paid for by legal aid. Simpson Millar will assist with getting the necessary reports (SLT, OT Physio etc. as required) from independent specialists to support an appropriate EHCP and take through the tribunal process if required. Ask if they can assist with an independent social care assessment as well. I hope this helps.
My understanding is that Simpson Millar has to take any case when it’s a child. That’s not the case for adults. The independent social worker maybe helpful in in helping to resolve the at home issues you describe.
Hi there, I’m sorry to hear this. It must be so difficult having to advocate so much for your son and feeling unsupported, especially going through your own mental health struggles. I’m sending you the warmest wishes.
I don’t have any personal experience in this, but I would recommend calling Mencap’s Learning Disability Helpline at 0808 808 1111 or email helpline@mencap.org.uk if it is easier to write it all down. They should be able to guide you in the right direction and offer support. I would also perhaps recommend looking into domestic abuse charities and organisations, if you feel it could be of benefit. You’re doing an amazing job advocating for your son and I’m wishing you the best of luck going forwards
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