“ The road was long but I ran it... “
There's a fire in my heart and I fan it...
If there's a fool for running, then I am it...
Just one thing to say and this is it...
I am a Runner
(Rocky Horror Lyrics... apologies)
Well... after the reference to me and odes, in the Pompom post, I just had to, didn't I 
Which, I must say is odd, me being so light hearted and frivolous, when in reality, that 10K Virtual run today, was the hardest 10K, possibly the hardest run, I have ever, ever, run !
I have been in two minds whether to post this run or not... I felt that the whole post may be too self pitying and depressing, but a couple of fairly, decent night's sleep, and knowing I am amongst friends here, here I am.
On Sunday, I ran the Virtual Spitfire Run...10K. An iconic run if you are lucky enough to get to do it at an RAF station... and the potential for the same, virtually, I had planned my route a while ago and was looking forward to the run with anticipation. Running for a young airman, and for Mr OF's father and stepfather.
Life had other plans...issues with my lovely Mr OF, his increasing frailty, battles for appointments changes, upsets and the latest round of tests, throwing up a whole load of new unexpected worry. I am not going to lay my worries down here, suffice it to say, the anticipation had disappeared in a blink !
My NRC 10K plan, begun as a new shake up plan, just for fun, ( I have always, on 10K comebacks used Ju Ju's plan. ), had to be tweaked , adjusted and eventually cast aside. I was not getting the runs in, short ones here and there, 5Ks too and the odd speed run... but no consistency at all and only up to 7K... mentally, trying to stay positive...daily routines of exercise carried out... sometimes at very odd times... and I odd places...arm workout with my resistance bands whilst sitting in the GP waiting room with Mr OF was interesting !
Long story short; under-prepared, and over-tired, I had to run this run, the last day for submitting results. Despite an horrendous fiasco on a hospital appointment for Mr OF, late Saturday afternoon, I still felt I had a choice. Run or No run.
As I said to someone today, if anyone on C25K or Bridge had listed such a tale of woe, I would have been oh so wise and said. the runs wait...but did I say that to me... no... silly old snail.. I put my gear out the night before, I pinned the Airman's name to my T shirt, checked my route and knew that I would do it.
Sunday dawned, bright and clear, the wind had dropped and the sun shone. I had slept really badly, but, did that stop me, did it heck... I geared up, I warmed up, normal routines and out. Up my favourite hill... you know I love my hills... Sunday? I think it was testing me.. ( understatement... ) ! Why would I even want to go up the hill !
But, up I went, lead legs, toxic 10 turning into something longer... breathing laboured and feet like lead. That hill has a twist in the tale... and that twist? Yes, I did give in... I jeffed the last little bit at the top...but on reaching the top, although I was already regretting the unwise choice of not changing my route plan... along the level I went... past the windmill, latterly, saved by the Community from demolishing... and along a way until/ turning and retracing , and then down Windmill Hill... down was a relief... my breathing was a tad easier, I was getting warmer... and did a quick strip off... light jacket tucked away as I turned across the Common. Site of my youth, and long summer days, sandstone outcrop and pond to dip in.. the tree, rediscovered on the Spring 10K....and across to the lane. The going was not getting easier... even the slight incline up the sandy path to the lane, felt steep...
CB's voice in my ear, hardly registered...although I seemed to hear the word grateful...I was not feeling grateful at all.
On again and the homeward 5; just thinking of that helped...momentarily, as the first spots of rain hit me, gentle at first and then heavier. Jacket back on!
On now, down towards the familiar territory of the aerodrome estate ...the known routes, the small ways between the closes and the crescents, the deserted playground, all of which I know so well, but today seemed to pass, unseen. I was really only conscious of my breathing and my tiredness.
Rain stopped and I was too hot, jacket off, laces tied tighter, an excuse to slow down even more...I felt at this point that I really was not going to be able to continue...the downhill so welcome at other times, felt equally hard.. (Coach Bennett himself admits, some runs never get easier !)
I had a quick photo stop at a planned point... the commemorative bench to all the pilots from the area... and then on across what would have been the taxi way to the main runway...My legs now? Well, they were working alone...they literally just kept moving... the rest of me seemed disconnected until suddenly CB's voice was in my ear...and I heard the word. Hope.
“ Hope. This is what gets us from the last finish line to each and every new starting line “
Hackneyed Maybe... but maybe, what I needed to hear...and the words began to resonate...Hope for all... the words went on until... I heard CB say, hope for humanity... for us all.
Now, I am not at all sure whether at this point, I was not quite with it,. ( and yes, I was really well hydrated ), but... I felt my legs strengthen, my breathing easier, and as I paused at the Spitfire bench... I took some deep , deep breaths.... crossing the road, I had 2K to go...steps lighter and my eyes on the sky... the sun tipping the clouds with silver... the beginning of a brand new day...and okay, now this does sound very dramatic... I did feel grateful .
Grateful, that I had the strength to run... hard as it was, I was grateful for my family, for my friends far and near, and yes, I was grateful to all those souls who had given their everything, in the name of humanity, so I am able to run free and unhindered across a grassy field, and back home to someone, who was waiting for me.
The last two K... ? I would love to say, that I flew, light of heart and fleet of foot. Not so.... the weather had one last trick to play. The heavens opened and within seconds I was drenched., soggy grass, soggy feet, wet through and through...my legs on automatic pilot...literally. They carried me, all the way home and, even as if to convince me even more of the fact that they were a separate entity to the rest of me, speeded up on the last kilometer.
Home at last... water consumed, stretches completed and a large lime and lemon marmalade sandwich. Normal service would be resumed... but it took a while. A long while.
Moral of this long ramble? I am , maybe not as sensible as one of my years should be. But, as Christopher Robin, famously said, to Winnie the Pooh;
"You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, (and smarter than you think" )
I don't know about smarter, but I do know, that the incredible support here, from friends, old and new, helps make me strong and helps make me the runner I am today.
Thank you.
Oldfloss x
Advice on Trail Race Training
A better than expected run 😊.
Bewl Water Half 
My HU10k today