I was unable to have my third round of chemo therapy due to an infection. The infection is now being treated. An X-ray showed that a lot was going on in my lung. A further scan showed that my left lung had totally collapsed and there was a blockage in the airway. I am now due to go into hospital on Thursday for an operation to remove the blockage. It could simply be a build up of mucus, a blood clot or the tumour growing which means the new chemo isn't working.
The airway being blocked makes sense as I have been more breathless recently and my cough has become more persistent. The chest drain I have fitted is still draining a mixture of fluid and blood which the oncologist and surgeon are unsure about.
I would really like some good news at some point. I smile, pop on a wig or bandana and push myself so very hard to try and lead a normal life. I often say "I'm fine' when really I want to curl up in bed and cry. I feel myself tumbling into a large black hole, my husband and teenage daughter are being wonderful. I just need something positive for them, to see their faces light up again would be magical x