Friend in IÇÙ

[PurpleRain-87]

Ĥì ÈveryoneWas looking for advice òn how Ì could care for my close friend who's in a coma after suffering TBI'S yesterday in a hit and run

[BigH63]

Hi Purplerain 87

I’m so sorry to hear this.

When you say care for I take it you mean while in hospital? For me I was the one in a induced coma so I’ve not got first hand experience of the caring side but what I will say is just be there talk to them about everyday things family what going in your world. Play music they like for them, hold their hand and generally just be there.

When I was in a coma I and coming out it’s a strange time and you’re not sure what’s real, but I had lucid moments of family there and my son playing music we both liked. Which was comforting

Thinking of you and I hope things get better for your friend.

[Rhyl1 Partner Moderator ICUsteps]

Dear PurpleRain-87 I agree with BigH63’s advice but I would also add keep an ICU diary talking about what’s happening in ICU but also what is going on at home. If the ICU staff have started one then ask if you can write in it about things that are important to your friend. Look after yourself as it’s desperately tiring when a patients in ICU and it’s hard to eat regularly and sleep.

[FamilyHistorian]

As a patient I will never know the trauma that relatives / friends go through.. but at this early stage you may find that the Critical Care Support Network will be able to support you. They hold a drop in on zoom on Tuesday evenings at 8 pm especially for friends / relatives. Contact them on [e-mail] .

[Sepsur]

Hope your friend recovers soon. ICUsteps do a great pdf on traumatic brain injury - it can lead to all sorts of changes that you & your friend might find confusing.

This link is straightforward :

mayoclinic.org/diseases-con...

[Kit10]

I hope your friend makes a good recovery. and I'm sure he/she will appreciate that you want to help.

I'd add - Because your friend wasn't expecting to end the day in hospital, there are practical things you may need to do for your friend apart from visiting them in hospital. If they live alone, you could check that their house is OK, any pets are being looked after, if you can get a key, maybe turn the heating down or the water off, put out the rubbish, maybe run a load of washing for them. If it's relevant, check their employer knows what's happened, that they have got any glasses/hearing aids etc that they might need. If you can, make sure they have clothes, toiletries, and their phone, wallet/purse for when they wake up. If the hit and run involved their car, do you know what's happened to it, if it's a write-off, can you get personal possessions out of it? If they were a pedestrian, is their car parked somewhere or was it left safely at home? (Or maybe your friend doesn't drive ...)

If they will be in hospital for a while, they may need someone to check their post for urgent bills, or go through their kitchen and clear out food that will go off while they're in hospital, water any house plants, push a hoover around, things like that.

Then when they wake up they don't need to worry about practical things, and they won't have to go home to a house that's full of mouldy stuff.

[Alex-Brighton-76]

Hi I am sorry to hear your situation. I've been on both sides of the fence it is not easy just talk to your friend give them news from home etc

It will be upsetting and hard but there will be improvement sometimes it takes time, be sure to chat to nurses if you able to do so or your friends family.

All the very best

[Ashfilm]

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. Having had the experience of a relative in ICU all I can say is spend as much time as possible with them.i know it's frustrating as your friend cant communicate with you at the moment but it does matter to the person. Maybe as another person said you could also offer to take care of practical things too. I hope your friend recovers from this horrible accident. Also remember to take care of yourself too .it can be very stressful when a loved one is so sick in ICU .