The meaning of life the universe and everything

[manicminer001]

Did you find the answer/met God or whatever during your coma? I have many ICU hallucinations/dreams but not any wiser really

[Sepsur]

🤣🤣🤣 - none the wiser.

I found no evidence of God there but ‘met’ plenty of friends of the other fella.

Now, afterwards, I try and strive for a life that honours my values & ambitions

[Gooddaysunshine]

On a number of occasions during my coma nightmares I nearly met the Grim Reaper, but fortunately never did - as I fear it may have actually been the end of me medically.I now try to take life one day at a time, and - after a lifetime of work slog - now find more pleasure in the simple and every day.

But no "meaning of life" moments or flashing philosophical insights.

[Hidden]

My dreams varied from fantasy to violent near death experiences. Usually involving people I knew either friends, relatives, work colleagues, or the doctors and nurses treating me, but no Gods. The dreams were often connected and took place in varied locations, including a marquee hospital in Scotland, or a small hospital in Cyprus for example. I was in Scotland a number of times with different storylines. France was another location. I remember most of the dreams but to write them down here would take too long. The main thing is that once I came round and was told I had not been to all these places I stopped having these dreams nor am I haunted, but I was a bit upset at the time.

[beardy_chris]

I had some exciting and beautiful psychedelic experiences but, if I found the meaning of life, the universe, and everything, I forgot it when I woke up!

[qmcsurvivor]

Hi, personally I am sceptical about there being a God but had one calm and serene memory during that time, I was told I nearly lost my life whilst ventilated and all other thoughts or delirium's were horrible.My bed was pushed forward and I was looking into an empty room with a cloud in the right hand corner gently pulsating with mellow coloured lights gradually people of all races began to appear not many and they were leaving flowers and other items under the cloud as though a temple, a woman appeared on my left side and smiled and offered me crystal clear water from a glass ladle and said, 'We can help you' the cloud began to lower and spread out towards me then my bed was pulled backwards and I was back in the horrible delirium again.

This was the only time I felt safe and calm so believe there is something beyond life.

[Kit10]

I did not have any of the standard near-death experiences I.e. looking down on myself, angelic music, tunnel of light.

However, I had a long sequence of connected dreams in which death and hell played a very large part. Not actual hell but a man called Gordon who had set up a reconstruction of it in an old slate mine in Wales. At the time it all seemed real and was often very frightening.

In the dream I learnt that hell is a hospital where the damned are tormented by being kept in bed for ever, unless they can escape and be reincarnated as a baby. In the dream there was a misunderstanding that ended with me being a patient in intensive care. There was a physiotherapist who promised to get me out. The owner Gordon was keeping watch over me. But the alarms that meant " a doctor has made a mistake" and "you are one step closer to death" kept going off, which was terrifying.

When I woke and found I really was a patient in intensive care, that was truly terrifying. I had no memory of what happened to put me there, and when I asked for Gordon the boss, and Alex the physio, and was told he didn't exist I was utterly bewildered, and felt abandoned.

The fact that I couldn't speak because of a trachy so communication was limited to laboriously spelling out short messages made it all much worse.

At the time it all seemed real and meaningful but looking back there was so much in the dreams that was so illogical and bizarre that I now see them as just strange dreams.

However I must at some level have known that I was close to dying which is what made me dream about it, and imagine the worst. I am STILL waiting for trauma therapy.

Sorry, no insights about the meaning of life.

[Larrythelathe in reply to Kit10]

How long have you been waiting. I've just done the self referral and I have a assessment Tuesday.

I still see and hear things. Mainly hear.

[Kit10 in reply to Larrythelathe]

How long have I been waiting?

When I woke in ICU, some sort of counsellor was the first thing I asked for, so 16 months. Every move of hospital/care home puts me back to square 1.

I tried an iapts self referral in Feb but they said my issues were too serious and urgent for them to address, and referred me on to the community mental health team. They sounded like they had a lot to offer, but they came to visit to do an assessment, said they'd be in touch within a fortnight, and didn't. I eventually had another visit a few days ago, when he said that because I'm about to move and go home soon hes not willing to "start work" for another 2-3 months, to give me time to "settle in" He also said that anything do do with my having MS was outside of his expertise and he'd have to refer me on for that....

It's all mixed up together in my mind and in my body, so how he thinks that could work I do not know.

I seriously wonder whether it's worth waiting for. I have tried to find advice on self help, but anything beyond the superficial it all says get a trained professional. Seems like I'm going to have to figure it out for myself.

The icu dreams have not recurred but

1) I used to find that if I woke from a dream it was gone. Now I often go back into the same dream,, e.g. if I wake in the night, the same dream continues when I fall asleep again.

2) I have a recurring dream type that there are people (nurses/carers) standing around me or in my room. This may be flashbacks to icu or hospitals generally.

The only organisation who have not kept me waiting or passed me on are The Samaritans, but you get a different person every time and may have to explain the same situation repeatedly.

I have tried to discuss my dreams and experiences of nearly dying with a couple of hospital chaplains, but they all had surprisingly little to say on the subject.

[manicminer001]

I had over different 25 nightmare visions/trips in over 3 weeks in coma. Different ages, places so detailed better than a movie theatre. I did learn to control some of them but only to a very limited degree. Those dreams were what repeated themselves.

I learned to accept the total loss of control which helped a bit. I do not think I am an anxious person in real life or have much to lose and still had these paranoid dreams.

When I was merged/united with all other souls I felt like I don’t belong to them as an individual, it felt like getting mixed in a bottomless massive blender or being dissolved what is in my book practically disappearing , did not feel right to me can’t be good!

Total opposite to some calming feeling others claim to have experienced.

I don’t think life makes sense at all, very little or illusion of control

[Larrythelathe]

I wonder if any who has been ventilated did not have have hallucinations ?