I wrote on here a few days ago about my husband is finding it hard to come out of festoon. They lowered one of his drugs yesterday from 150-120 and was doing ok with it. Oxygen was between 35-45%. I was fine until I phoned this morning, I have never felt to say that any of the nurses were rude in fact they have been lovely calming and reassuring, but today as usual I phoned asked if he had a good night and was stable and I got “well obviously otherwise we would have phoned you if there was a problem”. It’s not what she said it’s how she said it, so I said oh ok what’s the plan today she said doctors are going to try and wean him off sedation and oxygen today” I was so pleased that I said when can I phone back to see if all is ok she said “if it doesn’t work we will phone you and please be aware that I’m dealing with two patients”. I was so taken aback by her words and to be honest no one has phoned me since his been in ICU it’s me phoning them I don’t know what to do. I can’t just sit and wait for a call because they won’t phone me either way HELP xx
Weaning our of sedation: I wrote on here a few days... - ICUsteps
Weaning our of sedation
I’m going through this at the moment with a family member in ICU and it’s so hard so I really feel your pain. From what I’ve heard from the nurses, they are under extreme pressure at the moment with all sorts of staff redeployed to help out, who they have to supervise. They would normally only be looking after 1 patient and so the increase is huge.
Although they really should be sensitive to the position that we are in, I would be inclined to try and brush it off. The nurses are human after all. I would definitely call back later as the other nurse most likely would have changed shift and then you will be able to get an update on your husband. It sounds like he is really moving in the right direction so some positive news today. X
Please don’t be put off and do phone. The staff are stretched beyond anything that we would consider normal but that is no excuse, she/he would probably have no bedside manner whatever the circumstances. My wife quickly learned which nurses/doctors gave you a realistic but kindly delivered update
Make sure you phone whenever you feel that you need to. I know that it can be really frustrating trying to get hold of someone (it got even more frustrating once my husband moved to the ward as they never seemed to answer the phone!) and it just feels like you are waiting forever for a glimpse of good news. Getting that sort of response isn't helpful but try not to take it personally. As Mumitta said, they are only human so try not to take it personally.
After a while, I found there were slightly better times to call e.g. not when doctors were doing their rounds or lunchtime cover being done and I got into a routine. This didn't always work but it felt less stressful although I know that they are now working harder than ever so this strategy might not work now as they are caring for more than one patient at a time.
Yes your all right I know they have got a lot on. I think all of this is starting to wear on me now. I know that they said it can take a long time but I thought he might of come around by now. Maybe it’s me I’m impatient.. They tried to wean the sedation yesterday and he keeps going for the tubes and went for the nurses arms. Is it due to them panicking??? His stable all the time and his oxygen levels are good just want this to end now Xx
Just read back meant is it the patient that panics when they wean him off sedation???
People can suffer from delirium (I don't know too much about this but I think there is information on the ICU Steps website). I think this can cause panic.
Are they able to play music that he likes to him? I sent a radio in for my husband so he could have some music that he would like or sometimes the nurses would play things on their bedside computers for him. This might provide some familiarity for him and maybe ease the panic.
Are you able to do Skype/Facetime with him? I was able to speak to my husband everyday. Many people believe that they can hear everything going on around them so I'm sure your voice would help.
There is a relatives group on Tuesday evenings run by ICU Steps Chester. They have been brilliant for helping me get through a tough time and are a very knowledgeable bunch 🙂
Me and his children can talk to him whilst they put the phone to his ear face time I haven’t asked but I don’t want the children to be scared they are 12 and 14 and so close to him. I was offered the relatives group but I’m unsure I don’t know why xx
That's completely understandable. There is an ICU book for children which explains everything but it is probably a bit too young for your children. It is on the ICU Steps site and I think a link might have been shared on here recently.
I was a little unsure about the relatives group at first but I'm so glad that I did give it a try. Everyone has been so supportive and able to offer advice and answer my questions. It's lovely to have a group of people who know exactly what I am going through. We would love to see you there but you need to do what you think is best for you 🙂
Yes I might give it a go if that’s ok x
Of course. They are a lovely bunch and won't be offended if you discover that it isn't for you 🙂 Hope to see you on Tuesday
HI Jess, It's so hard isn't ? You want to know what is going on and you don't want to keep phoning and distracting them from looking after your husband. I would say her tone was possibly just sheer exhaustion and she probably reflected later and felt dreadful.I had something similar when my husband was in ITU. Can you not speak to PALS ?
In the first wave many hospitals put some liaison teams in place to contact the loved ones of patients in ITU, we would get a daily update.
It's impossible to function without knowing your loved ones condition, if things were different you would be aware of everything a you would be by his bedside .
I hope today has been kinder to you x
I get they are under extreme pressure but the only contact and update you can get are by telephone . My dad was in for 11 weeks back in March and depending on the staff who answered the call would determine my whole day . I had two calls from consultants and that was bearing bad news both times . So I tried taking it as a good sign if they never rang me . I rang every morning and my brother would ring just after shift change that why it was different staff and sometimes the information was different.
I really do feel your pain all you want to do is be with your loved ones at a time like this . Wishing your husband a full recovery. My advice is keep on calling your within your rights to do so .
Thank you I’m on my own with 2 children not all nurses are like that a lot of them are nice but when you do get a negative one like you say it affects the whole of your day xx
Hi everyone just phoned the hospital because the children wanted to speak to their dad that was ok and fine, nurse said my husband is going to have ct scan on his stomach I said ok. I know his got a drainage in his stomach I said is there much coming out he said no not much I said that’s good. He went to hospital initially for pancreatitis but to be fair I don’t actually know what’s going on or what’s happening, is this normal? In one way I want to know what’s wrong with him obviously but on the other hand I’m petrified what they would say in case it’s something really bad. If it was something really bad would they want to try and wean him off sedation and ventilator I don’t know? Any ideas xx
Contact the liason and complain. Ask if someone can be assigned to update you?
Sad unexpected passing of my beloved Brother. 
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