Sepsis am I lucky to have survived?

[Aodhan]

Hi I survived sepsis nearly a year ago but I’m not sure how much longer I can or want to carry on. I really want to tell the way things have happened but as soon as I start the shaking becomes uncontrollable, then vomiting and even now the way I’m being treated by the system, my gp is so unbelievable I can’t help thinking maybe I am the crazy one and what’s the point. Hopefully I will find the strength to actually find the help or someone who will listen to me if not for my sake then for my sons x

[mikea101]

Hello Aodhan,

It sounds like you have been through a very traumatic experience, as have I and have many others on this site who survived sepsis. I was fortunate enough to be referred to a trauma therapist, with whom I found myself able to talk through the hallucinations I experienced and the horrors of being so suddenly and so seriously ill. I talked and I talked and I cried and I cried. Maybe this would be difficult for you right now face to face, but maybe when you’re ready, and only when you’re ready, you could say more here about what you experienced? What do you feel you need that you’re not getting at the moment?

[Melanieyac123]

Yes you are lucky my uncle didn't make it and the reason I am saying this is even watching him go through it was scary he was in an induced coma and would open his eyes and try to scream so only he knonws what he was seeing god love him as he never woke up to tell us his organs failed multiple times it was horrific down right heart broken we all are even 3 years down the line I don't know what you went through but I'm sure it was a disgusting experience and I am so sorry but please don't feel like that easier said than done I know can't you change your gp or speak to someone at the icu were you was there is help out there you have made it through the sepsis tou can do this you didn't say much about what happened or how you feel but I'm always here to try and help

Kind regards

Mel

[garry2017]

Hello Aodhan, I had sepsis December 2017, I went through a terrible time whilst under sedation, I had to learn to walk,talk eat and deal with a stoma, I am nowatching very well and enjoying the fact that I am still here, lucky? yes, very I truly believe it is what you make it and the love of family, my daughter was and is my strength, I hope things improve for you, Garry 2017

[daffy23]

Hi Aodhan, I had sepsis 6 months ago, & it was a horrible experience. I've had very good follow up from the hospital I was in, and I've self referred to a counsellor (because the NHS wait was so long). I've found it helpful to talk to someone outside the situation. I have written down the things I experienced in the delirium, which I felt would get it out of my head, and I've also done a timeline of the missing 2 weeks thanks to info my friend gave me. To be fair, my friends have been really good, but I must make them wonder if I'm going crazy with some of the things I've told them about the delirium! I found the ICU followup clinic at the hospital really helpful, to be able to talk to someone who understands & can assure you that you're not going mad & the things you've seen & experienced are common. If you're in UK, have a look on Sepsis UK website. They have support groups in some areas of the country. It sounds to me as if you have PTSD, which is a very real illness & not 'all in your head'. Also, see if the ICU you were in do any followup, and I would suggest seeing a different GP & go armed with info from Sepsis UK. Really hope you get the help you need. Best wishes.

[sonyahmaree]

Aodhan I think you have PTSD. It is very common in people who have had traumatic events. Coma is definitely one of them. I can not believe there are still doctors out there who do not take this type of thing seriously. You need to find a new doctor. One who is kind and will listen with an open mind. Even if you go onto FB in your area and ask people to recommend a doctor who fits what you need. You definitely need to talk about your fears but you need to feel your safe. Depression also maybe affecting you. It sounds from your post that you had no counseling offered to you even after the coma? If not then that is just negligence. Please please seek out a new doctor. There are so many who will care about what you are going through. With the right meds and counseling, things will get better. If you feel you can't talk about things, maybe write them down. This may help you to feel less scared because you are not actually saying the words. My daughter had terrible hallucinations when awake, then awful nightmares. Every time she tried to talk about them she would cry and cry and shake all over. She started writing things down and she said it help her get a handle on what was real. And one more thing. you are NOT crazy at all. You have a treatable medical condition that's all. Please keep us up to date. Email me directly if you want to talk anytime. My email addy is [e-mail]

[sarahjane12]

Hi Aodhan hope your feeling better soon I was in a coma for a week back in 2016 with sepsis and pneumonia I haven’t been back to work since as I’ve been suffering really bad with ptsd but am almost on the mend maybe have a follow up at icu the nurses are lovely in there and talk u through everythink that’s what u need to talk it all through and maybe a bit of medication till ur back on the mend good luck Aodham just message me if u need to talk am hear to listen.

[AdrianaLiz]

Don’t give up! It gets better, I was taking ADHD medication before I was hospitalized and I believe that is helping me have some motivation. It is hard though, and no I am not the same person. I do continue to have the PTSD but everyone around me says I look great! Emotionally though it is very difficult and honestly no one will understand except the people here that went through it.

[swiss1978]

I am too a sepsis survivor, chest infection that went bad and then shut down all my organs - coma for a week and incubated during that time. Each day I have remind myself not everyone who goes into ICU walks out the door with another chance at life - whatever that maybe. I am learning and its not easy 'acceptance' for my now changed condition. I am going to try meditation soon to improve my outlook on things