Hello all!
I have a dilemma! First, a little context; I am Joseph, I am 21 and I had a concussion (or mTBI) three years ago.
I had used cannabis (a very rare occasion), and fallen down a step into an overhang. I have persistent symptoms - fatigue, dizziness, slightly blurred vision, constant brain fog, memory, concentration and other cognitive issues, exercise intolerance, emotional issues.
It fluctuates, so sometimes I ‘crash’ and feel very very slow in the head, non-verbal and very slow moving or immobile; and sometimes I have more energy (though often will overdo it at these times). I recently think I had a non-epileptic seizure, but haven’t spoken to my doctor yet. As a sort of metric, I can meet with a friend for maybe 2 or 3 hours before I might start crashing and I need to go home.
I have just finished first year on a dance/design course in Amsterdam which includes some dance, some stage design, lighting, art studies, dramaturgy etc. It was an often intense year, usually 9-5 or 11-5, and I would crash most weeks, one or a few times.
I went to CognitiveFX in the US in October for two weeks, which showed small improvements, but I would often have setbacks. I have home rehab exercises from them, which I would do after 5, four days a week (took 1h30 to 3 hours each time, so I would often be at school until late!). When I focus on them, and am not too busy, I can feel progress, but school was just too busy to maintain progress.
Now onto the question; I have already decided to drop out of this course and move back to the UK, since it is too much for me.
Now, I am currently deliberating if I drop everything, take a gap year, and focus on my recovery, or if I join a Fine Arts course in Glasgow in September whilst also focusing on recovery.
(The course has great disability support, but its is the load I am questioning. It is 80% studio practice and 20% writing practice. Studio practice means independent time with your own studio space to work on projects, read books, be bored, doodle, have tutorials with staff and group critiques. Writing practice means lectures and essays.)
Being home is not a great or healthy environment for me on a gap year (I’ve done one before) so I would probably move, maybe to Glasgow for half the year, which I am financially fortunate to be able to do, but I would still get a part time job to provide some structure and income.
What are people’s experiences in pursuing rehabilitation some years after persistent post concussion symptoms, and are you still dropping everything to focus on it, or is it helpful for you to have work/study as a source of structure and motivation?
Any comments, advice, personal experience would be greatly appreciated, however big or small! Or, perhaps even wisdom as to how I can approach the question myself.
Love, Joseph