A year has gone.

Last night at 6.30pm was a year since my accident happened. For the past week I was getting emotional, my frustration was getting worse, I wanted to scream and was getting angry. Over the weekend I had big plans and wanted to so things but it was getting to me that a year ago I was a different me. I upset my partner, got angry with myself, but still went and done what I wanted us to do. I'm disappointed that it didn't turn out the way I wanted it to over the weekend and I am wishing that it would all change. I just want this year to be so much better than the last year. 😪

[paxo05]

Hi,Next year will be better. You are accepting the new you more and with acceptance you will move forward.

Write down how you are feeling in a journal. Add to it when you can , then you can look back and see how you have improved.

If not a journal write yourself a letter to open next year . Include how you feel and what you can or cannot do.

As for planning , don't get carrier away. Don't plan too much in one go. You tire then get disappointed when you do not achieve them.

For taking it out on loved ones, we'll we hurt the ones we love. It doesn't make it right but is understandable. Apologies and explain the date got to you. They probably already know this but an apology is nice.

24 years later I'm still unsettled around my birthday and the anniversary of my rta. They are a week apart so is not the best time of year emotionally fir me.

Don't get to down on yourself , you recognise why you feel this way and the affect it has.

You will keep improving,

Pax

[cat3]

One year on, you're right in the centre of finding out who you are now. Fatigue and confusing emotions after brain injury is often troublesome for relationships.

It's a learning process. I recall how the contents of my brain tended to spill out impatience and petulance until I learned to 'Pause-Rewind'.

Don't beat yourself up m'love. As Pax has said, apologize when you've been unreasonable and explain how it upsets you too.

Maybe download relevant information on brain injury and its long term effects from Headway ?

Take care. x

[Teazymaid]

Hi it’s such a horrible place to be .. I’m nearly 3 years and your words have summed up how I feel . I don’t want this my life has changed I have changed .. not that others can see this they only saw the body injuries and operations I had in my shoulders .. even to the point that I felt like I had been on a holiday when I had the first operation as I became a person again , I was notified not invisible.. even the pain off the operation didn’t stop my spirit being lifted for the first time in 8 months Drs listen to me , family saw the pain … but the head injuries are have had and still do have a massive impact on all out lives so I’m not surprised your feel as you do .. but on a plus side I’m two years ahead of you and you do somehow start to cope with it .. don’t beat yourself up if you have a bad day or days .. you /we are aloud to get p@@@@d off as all of the people who have no idea would also feel the same .. you will get there as time does move on and keep chatting on here as we all get what you mean ..sue x

[Painting-girl]

Oh dear S, the anniversaries can be hard, particularly that first one. You've had a very tough year to deal with, after some severe injuries . Can you be kind to yourself and reflect that what happened to you would have been really hard for anyone to cope with, and also think how you would treat someone else that you heard this story from?Try and give yourself some of the compassion and kindness you would give to that someone else.

You've got through this first year, and you don't have to live this particular one again. The next one will be different, and have different challenges. It might help you to ring the Headway helpline and just have a talk about what comes next for you, and if you can access any further help / support.

I kept a journal at one point and just wrote down the one main thing I had got done that day, if anything went well, and any small things I was glad about in that particular day, like sunshine or chocolate - Sorry, this last sounds really too trite in terms of the big stuff that you've dealt with this year, but it was something I just fell into myself in the early days, which helped me differentiate between different days.

Take care, we're all rooting for you x

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Thank you to everyone who replied, everyone has different views so it's good to hear. X