contrecoup head injury : taken place this feb... - Headway

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contrecoup head injury

Forrest1512 profile image
14 Replies

taken place this feb.

Seeking self help as all other routes seem to be obstructed and feels like a life time in waiting times for me!

Additional evidence I’m not in the right mind frame is that reading through these stories doesn’t seem to affect me in the slight (apologies as don’t want to offend)

My easy question amongst many was that I’m now easily offended - when somebody reads my message but doesn’t reply I’m furious and take that very personally.

Personality changes meaning I’m critical and judgemental of not only myself but family and work colleagues. After 9 months this has only got worse.

There is far too much uncertainty- my wife has said she misses the old me and doesn’t like the new one! But is this likely to be more improved?!

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Forrest1512 profile image
Forrest1512
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14 Replies
cat3 profile image
cat3

Firstly Forrest, your brain injury is very recent in terms of rehabilitation. There's a tendency to believe we should be back on track within weeks/months once we're over the initial trauma, but brains are amazingly complex and the timeline of improvements is unknown.

It's a re-learning process, often with behavioural issues being the most challenging. Learning to reign in the indignation when things don't go our way or someone offends us, and walking away from discord rather than escalating it is a good place to start.

The lack of empathy is common after brain injury, along with the emotional lability - affecting loved ones besides ourselves. Hopefully some rewiring around the affected area will help compassion kick back in ; meantime, with a united approach, partners can help each other with none-judgmental guidance & willingness to learn.

And don't dismiss behavioural therapy unless you've tried it. 🤔 I poo-pooed talking therapy initially, but twelve months of weekly sessions proved me very wrong....

Stay around Forrest & keep talking. Cat x

Forrest1512 profile image
Forrest1512 in reply to cat3

thanks for your wise words and understanding cat!

Very true, once walking out of that hospital door I was ready to get to myself… little did I know!

Being considered a recent sufferer, I’m still in the process of seeking professional help, self referred for CBT but that hasn’t helped much.

I’m on the waiting list for counselling with headway local branch, which is a talking therapy which hopefully will help! (Also was a no for me at the beginning)

Take care of yourself!

pinkvision profile image
pinkvision

Not caring about others and only caring for yourself is a description of a narcissist. Your injury has affected your 'wiring' changing how you see and experience the world and others in it (assuming you are different from before). A psychiatrist would be good at dealing with this as long as they have brain injury experience. Quite a few others on here have seen them and rather than what most people have expected they turned out to be really good at dealing with brain injury issues. Maybe this would be a route for you to follow.

Forrest1512 profile image
Forrest1512 in reply to pinkvision

Hi Pink,

Yes, my advice has been to seek counselling with a brain injury professional- fortunately headway offer this at a massively discounted rate in my area, Guildford Branch - still on the 10 week waiting list, but good things take time.

Take it steady!

V8Lurcher profile image
V8Lurcher

Hi Forrest, I know where you're coming from. Waiting times are pretty bad and just getting put on the waiting list is a battle. I've got a referral for neurology over a year after I first asked. with my first (telephone) appointment in January, 20 months after the accident.I contacted my local IAPT about my psychological issues. You can do an online self referral. Again it was about 6 months wait. I go once a fortnight, I don't get anything out of it to be honest, but will keep at it.

I miss old laid back self (as do others), but can't do much about it now.

Forrest1512 profile image
Forrest1512 in reply to V8Lurcher

wise Lurcher, wise!

In terms of waiting lists I’ve self refered for CBT, and to be honest after 3 biweekly sessions it’s not done anything for me - I’ve been told a few times that unless it’s a specialist with TBI experience it will be difficult for them to help.

I do feel lucky in terms of being convinced to make an injury claim, I now have a solicitor and case manager assigned to me, have been promised a neuropsychologist and OT assessment, but once again I’ve been left waiting around.

Maybe one day I’ll accept that things won’t get any better, but will the people around me? Who knows!

I was also advised by my GP to cut the waiting time and seek counselling privately, fortunately headway offer specialist counselling at a hugely discounted rate - TAKE A LOOK!

Thanks again!

CanisLupus profile image
CanisLupus

Hi x

It’s taken my daughter 4 years since her TBI to start showing/understanding empathy and to let’s say lengthen her short temper. As it’s always said healing takes time. Good luck on your journey.

CanisLupus profile image
CanisLupus in reply to CanisLupus

to add yes it is a roller coaster buckle up you’re in for the ride, sometimes things get worse before they get better. But looking in that mirror smile and see how far you’ve come already xx

Forrest1512 profile image
Forrest1512 in reply to CanisLupus

thank you for your kind words - the reason for this post is because I’ve hit a bad point in this journey.

Pairofboots profile image
Pairofboots

Hi, you have had some good advice about recovery, and am glad you have engaged with Headway. Most generic services fail people with brain injuries. This is because in the case of BI, it isn't just a chemical imbalance, there are physical changes that effect thought. The best people to help are neuropsychology and neuropsychiatry. These approach the problem with the BI at the forefront of the issue a tailor support, therapy, and treatment with that in mind. Best wishes 🍀

MimiSpree profile image
MimiSpree

Time. During the last seven years, tracking how my soul, heart, and mind adapt has been the most incredible reveal I have experienced. I would have been happier not to experience it, but everyone struggles with something and these are just the cards I was dealt. The toughest revelation is that I have to accept help: I have to humble myself (acknowledge my limitations and accept I'm not in control), and vigorously seek professional help, despite everything my mind tells me. I find it unfair to expect my husband to understand me better than I understand my own condition. Thankfully there are caregiver support groups, and amazingly, he enthusiastically joins them; much easier than I join patient support groups. I see it as my job to find both of us support and do everything to help us thrive. Navigating relationships is always challenging, and with the added struggle of an unfamiliar injury/illness, we should accept a bit of help is in order. Life never remains stagnant, for anyone.

Forrest1512 profile image
Forrest1512 in reply to MimiSpree

very true!

Maybe I am too new to this journey…

I have reached the stage of accepting and seeking help, which feels good.

The only thing is that I don’t want to make family feel belittled by speaking to them in simple terms to try and understand OR put them into imaginary scenarios, it seems the only way to explain how my brain is processing, but, to sit back and write this, really does feel unfair!

Tanglewood77 profile image
Tanglewood77

I think you need a neurophysiologist as I've found over the last few years unless they are a specialist in bi they don't understand or no how to help you correctly.because a neurophysiologist will explain why you do it due to your individual brain injury and ways to control things and stop them from happening(depending on the bi) and give you options on copping with this you injury and every day things you have problems with that we don't always see good luck 🤞

Forrest1512 profile image
Forrest1512 in reply to Tanglewood77

agree!

I am still on a waiting list for a neuropsychologist assessment.

Take it steady!

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