Diffuse Axonal Injury

[ZP1980]

My husband was involved in a serious car accident in sept 2018. He spent 6 weeks in an induced coma and we were then told he had diffuse axonal injury. He also had a serious leg injury. He now walks with a stick after an operation but hes still not confident. He has lived with carers in a rented property since he came out of rehab. We are due to move into rented accomodation with children who are 16,13 and 4. This is a trial period and im praying this all works out. Ive heard recently that brain injury can reduce someones life expectancy and now its making me depressed keep thinking about it. I would like people to give me advice please on whether this is a known fact and if its very common or a low statistic. As in my head now its deadset its going to happen and its killing me.

[sealiphone]

These are the type of question I asked my consultant and as I understood it things very much depend on the type and location of the injury.

If it was my partner I'd in the first instance ask the GP and if they don't know ask them to seek the information from the consultant. That is if no one here is sure about the answer, I presume this is a very complex question.

[Ivanlc]

Can i ask who told you TBI reduced life expectancy & in what context?

I was hit side-on by a double decker bus 20 years ago & though I was in a coma for 3 weeks (*not* induced; GCS of 1, indicating a severe injury; unlikely return to prior levels of functioning).

Though i have had my fair share of issues, I've also travelled around Australia & studied Italian for about 8 months in Perugia & frequently use fairly dangerous power tools in my workshop(!)

Ok, I'm certainly not the quickest of mind (though i never really was; but I worked hard). I also struggle w/ depression & labile mood frequently at the moment, but my *life expectancy* would only be lowered by the choices I make/have made, *NOT* by having had the brain injury itself.

Don't get me wrong; you have a *long* & tricky road ahead, but whoever told you your husband's life expectancy would be reduced was either ignorant, scare-mongering or both... >}o\

[sealiphone in reply to Ivanlc]

Glasgow Scale 1 would mean you're incredibly lucky to be still be with us, I was 1 and told my chance of survival had been 1%, which doesn't much matter after discharge.

I was told level doesn't necessarily correlate with degree of recovery but then again I still wasn't far along when I discovered he was "Sat in front of a miracle".

Being agnostic it made me laugh out loud, after my second bleed the consultant said "No one has three miracles, if I see you again you'll be dead".

[cat3]

I've read a great deal and discussed brain injury at length with neuro-consultants over the years. I've also talked with others here on Headway for over 8 years, and I've never heard of brain injury being life-limiting unless referring to a progressive disease or catastrophic, untreatable injuries.

I used to obsess about dying when I was younger but since a bleed on the brain I've become fatalistic and unconcerned about how or when my life will end. I'm too busy trying to get the most out of life to dwell on an inevitable event which will come to us all in time.

Please ZP, take the days one at a time and focus on supporting your man and your children. Your husband has many challenges ahead, as do you and your three children, and you'll need all your energy for supporting him through the changes and in his search for purpose and quality of life.

If you can't shake off the worry of premature death (which is far from the truth) then it may be you're suffering from exhaustion or PTSD and would benefit from antidepressant or anti-anxiety medication to free yourself from unfounded dark thoughts ; your GP should help you through this.

I hope you can shake off these burdensome thoughts and that there are better days ahead for you and all your family. Look after yourself m'dear.......

Beat wishes, Cat x

[Maggydripping]

My husband had a severe brain injury in a RTA 35 yrs ago when he was 50. Now 85.Unconscious for 2 weeks, not induced. 8 hr surgery. Although he has problems we have managed to travel extensively and have a reasonable life. I won't pretend that it's not challenging but there are lots of good times.

Age is starting to catch up with him , but it's already caught up with many 85 yr olds ! Take any help you can get.

[ZP1980]

I'd like to thank you all for your positive replies. Before I posted on this site yesterday I had such an overwhelming depression. I get annoyed with myself as I think what right do I have to feel like that when its my husband that went through it. You have all made me wake up this morning feeling more positive. I know the future is going to be extremely hard but when it was touch and go with him in the early days I used to just will for him to keep fighting to stay alive and I used to say let him get through it and we'll overcome as many hurdles as we can. Im so grateful for sites like this as people understand whereas for people that havent been through it have no idea. Thank you so much to all x

[sealiphone in reply to ZP1980]

I think it was much worse for my wife than I, especially when I was in a coma and when I came 'round I wasn't really aware of what it really meant for a long time.

I think she lost 25% of her body weight in 5 weeks due to the stress, when I eventually came out it was a competition for whose bones were protruding the most.

It did take 12 months before I was anything like my previous self, it's a very slow process for the brain to repair itself.

[cat3 in reply to ZP1980]

You have every right to feel overwhelmed and scared ZP ; brain injury is a life changing event for families just as much as it is for the survivor. It still pains me knowing what my family endured in the early days whilst I was in cloud-cuckoo land.

On one of my son's daily visits he was told I'd gone to the loo so he waited in the corridor then videoed me on his phone all the way back to my bed, saying what a wonderful moment it was and one he wanted to keep forever.

Please keep us updated m'love on your man's progress and also on how you are coping. Cat x

[1949liz]

Next time when you are feeling down and worried Reread all the positive messages which have been sent to you, maybe download them and put them in your journal 📔 if you have one, if not may I suggest you get one as they are most helpful. Also it’s remarkable how helpful it is to look back on your life’s journey and see how much you, your husband, and children have come on during this difficult phase in your lives . You seem to be a very strong lady so keep looking at all the positive aspects of your life and your kindness and love will always get you through. With much Love and Prays Liz xx🙏🌹

[katndog75]

Hi, pop on over to Facebook and search for Brain Injury Carers Support. It's a private group offering moral support for people caring for someone close to them with a BI. Somewhere you can have a virtual scream or celebrate those little victories which no one else will understand. K

[ZP1980]

Thank you again to all of you. I'm so glad I found this site. it has and is helping me. Thank you xxx