Hi everyone I hope you all managed to cope during this festive season. Not an easy time for many different reasons. Tomorrow morning I am heading into London for another EEG test. Not what I expected to be doing on new year's eve but 11am is early in the day at least. I guess I just wanted to share it because I have nobody to talk to about it. I had one in 2016 which came up ok. Am pretty certain this one will too. But I had two episodes this year in April and September where I spaced out and blacked out briefly. I had my last seizure in June 2016 where I blacked out for 30 minutes. (no witnesses though as I live alone). My neurologist thinks this year's episodes may be complex partial seizures. But who knows... My injury was to the left temporal lobe so is a possibility. Anyway I just needed to share don't ask me why. It just helps to. I am not going to find tomorrow easy as I lost my brother unexpectedly in May this year. I spent the last 3 new year's eve with just him. Maybe going to hospital is a blessing in that it takes my mind off missing him a bit. He was so worried about me when I had the spaced episode in April so he will be happy knowing I am going for another test. Anyway I hope you all have a happy new year eve and take care all.
Ro xx
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Ro_76
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Hi Ro, Its good to share concerns and news. It hasn't been an easy year has it! I've been thinking of you this Christmas with the loss of your brother. I hope you all had a peaceful time, although it will have been difficult I understand. We lost someone close this year too - a bit like "I didn't see that one coming; a bolt out of the blue!"
An EEG will be a good idea to clarify which part of the brain these fits emanate. Be brave! Remember to take little rests in the hospital if possible. Will be thinking of you tomorrow! Love Blue x
Thank you yes hasn't been the greatest year. And exactly as you say a bolt out of the blue. So sorry to hear you have suffered a loss too. Is so difficult on top of the struggles we have anyway. I think what I meant to say about tomorrow is I always had my brother to talk to. Obviously my family do care and my dad will be driving me to London. But I feel alone this time. Poor family are grieving and of course NYE is more difficult. So that is what I meant. Thank you for replying. Will be thinking of you too Blue..is a difficult time of the year when grieving.
This EEG I have done through before so at least I am aware what happens. But it is draining. In a way I wish something would come up because it makes it easier then... Instead I have gone from being told I can drive so reapplied. To being told this Nov I can't again just yet.. So it goes on.
Sweet Mother of God, Ro. There've been periods when I've felt a bit sorry for myself over the last 18 years since my TBI, but divining what I can from what you wrote above, you're someone who actually has very, *very* good reasons to feel this way:
- Your parents are in some way not there in the way you need them to be, since you say that you have no-one to talk to except for your younger brother - who has now very sadly passed. I can't imagine the size of black hole you must be in, given how close you clearly must have been.
- You've developed epilepsy secondary to your TBI according to what you've written. I don't know if you drove prior to your injury, but if you did, this is one more luxury that you'll no longer have.
We all place different levels of importance on the various things we lose after brain injury, be they family, friends, purpose, independence, job/career or any of the other multitude of faculties that can be taken from us.
But the things you've lost Ro (is this short for anything, btw?), are the kind of things that would have had a *massive* impact on my own sense of identity & my independence. The fact that you are taking it with such equanimity is testament to you being able to get through this.
How are you coping financially? Are you able to work?
Thank you Ivanic. I returned from hospital a few hours ago and am at my dad's tonight. I went to bed soon after I got in as feel drained after it today. Have had a headache in right hand side too. I had an episode whilst sat in chair as the wires were being stuck on my head. I suddenly came over faint and hot then the panic set in. I kept quiet about it until the man asked me to move so he could stick more to my shoulder area. He set the alarm got another member of staff in and helped me to lay down. Did tears after to see I was awake etc. I just cried it was out of the blue. No idea if seizure rates maybe just brain overload. Before the long process of wiring he had been asking me all about my seizure and head injury. Perhaps that was still playing on my mind and my body was overloaded. Well at least it happened in that room with cameras. And the wires attached. Annoyingly I won't hear results until my neurologist is due to call me in June! He said it takes around 3 weeks for results. So o need them then not June. Ok sorry needed to get it out of my system. Has taken it out of me today more than last time.
I am fortunate to be working full time Ivanic, but at a price.. Hence the spaced or black outs I guess. I forget I have a brain Injury and over do this is alot. The driving had to stop immediately after my head injury in 2015 then just before that year was up I had the second seizure. No witness but I know it was as I had the aura and can't remember 30 minutes. I was told last Nov I can reapply so did. But then after the 2 episodes this year that us back on hold. Best to be safe. Anyway have gone on about myself too much now.
Take care all and hope you can have a happy new year xxx
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