Some days are so hard

[Devaiur59]

Today, it's my day to help my mum looking after my dad, he was great this morning, then out of tiredness because he hasn't slept again, he's throwing nasty comments towards us all. My 3 year old is off nursery today, and she's getting it too calling the poor beautiful little girl ugly and annoying.

He would never of said anything like that before, and some days he's not like that, but today is turning out to be one of those days with him, and most days I don't mind, but today I'm finding it emotionally draining, especially when it's directed towards my daughter.

We still don't know if it's worth moaning at him for his insults as because of his memory, he can't remember saying it anyway. Feel guilty moaning as know it's not his fault, and it's not the person he was but some days it's bloody hard to take the constant personal insults. Hopefully, he will be feeling better in couple hours, as his moods change from one minute to the next. Here is hoping for a better afternoon 😳😊

[steve55]

devaiur59 its not tiredness. ive got a bi due to a stroke and i can be horrible but only know when my wife tells me.

is he on anything for his mood swings? i take epilim because i knew they could be used as i refused to take anything else.

i also suffer from memory problems

[Devaiur59 in reply to steve55]

Hi steve55, thanks for replying, yes he is on sodium valproate. He can only have certain medication on very low doses as his heart is weak, that's been half the doctors problem.

He can be lovely sometimes, and we try not take it too heart, but just sometimes it's hard. The thing he was known for most in our family, is how close he was to his grandkids, and how just lively and silly and how much time he had for them, now he can only handle them in short doses.

Feels like the biggest shame in all of this, as don't want grandkids to remember him for being grumpy, but suppose I need to look at it like, at least there now going to have a memory of him as he is still alive.

I understand it must be so hard for him, the only way I can only imagine it to be like is I used to work nights for years, and after a few nights I would be absolutely shattered and could not concentrate, and had little tolerance and that's how my poor dads brain must feel all the time.

Think it's just hard to hear sometimes, but we all love him and forgive him. Does your brain injury make it difficult for you to stay asleep, and if so, how do you manage that please. Sorry for all the questions, it's just that my mum gets me to ask questions for her too 😊

[steve55 in reply to Devaiur59]

my brain injury was in feb 2012 as a result of a stroke,i was 52, it happened on the saturday as i was due to get clearance to go back to work after a 2nd cateract operation.

i was in for 5 days, no support after that. my wife had a break down at work which resulted in me seeing a psychiatrist and a neuro psychiatrist., the psychiatrist i still see and i also have a neurologist.

im ex forces and since my stroke an ex heavy drinker and smoker, i dont smoke anymore, but between 7pm and 3am i drink 4 cans of strong lager, but i am up again at 930am and have a snooze in the afternoon.

if you need to ask anything else else please feel free

steve

[Devaiur59 in reply to steve55]

Thanks very much for your reply Steve 😊