Feeling down

Hi all,

This weekend I have been feeling down, the depression creeps up, stays for a bit, does its damage then goes again but its decided to hang around, Ive tried everything from listening to music to watching tv to walking (to the point I got sunburnt) and it just wont go and I am feeling "locked in my head" and cant escape, ive tried messaging people to meetup and they have either replied late or not bothered getting back to me which always makes me feel like crap, I haven't been bothered to go to zumba all ive done is hang out on a gaming form to have someone to talk, Saturday evening this mood made me tired so I curled up in bed and fell asleep, spent yesterday afternoon crying for a bit so I feel like Ive had rubbish weekend. so I was just wondering do other people feel like this and if so how do they cope? - Bexx

Im also trying to get over someone which doesn't help and I don't even know why I liked this guy in the first place and Ive been trying to get over him for 6 months now and talking to him doesn't help and not talking to him doesn't help so I feel stuck in limbo the worse thing is we work together

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  • I'm sorry I have no advice Hun :( but a listening ear if u want to talk xx

    My partner can get like this and he needs out the house,anywhere just to clear his head!if he doesn't he ends up in bed and often feeling worse until it passes

    He has found a fitness class that makes him feel better and get rid of frustration and because it's at a set time he has the motivation to go unlike the gym

    Hope u feel better soon xxx

  • thanks

  • Sorry to hear your feeling down .....it's a constant battle to find the balance that works , just don't beat you self up it will pass 😏that's what I tell myself

  • thanks I wish I could find something to speed up the process

  • lol don't we all

  • Im gonna stuff my face full of chocolate and hope it helps and it is

  • Dark Healthy chocolate, omega stuff, walnuts, almonds and a pint of Guinness :)

  • Hi bexx, am sorry to hear that you have been feeling so down. Maybe you could find a suitable counsellor to help you understand why you are feeling so down and stuck about your relationship break up. I'm probably not offering any new ideas. However, that's all I can suggest.

    BTW dark chocolate has been proven to lift moods.

    Take care.

  • Dark chocolate :)! Even put green & Blacks Dark coco powder in my porridge, a thing UK troops did with field rations.

  • So sorry to hear this. You say you haven't even been to Zumba.

    Maybe that's just it you don't feel like doing things because of the depression.

    I know it's hard.....And feels impossible...But you need to force yourself to go. It will feel like being forced I know but after going it may help begin the climb out of depression.

    Dealing with depression is no picnic and may mean doing things you don't want to do.

    If I am being hard I am sorry I don't mean to be. I suffer the same problems myself. Depression can make you want to just curl up but we know that is no answer.

    Please be positive and start the climb back.

    All the best .

    Pax

  • Exactly what happens too me randomly. Even have that ultra rare event / gathering / party & up pops the invisible Beast of burden...

    Your doing alot to try shake it :) anything from childhood hobbies or pleasant memory to repeat & try shake off? I skateboard with music & sing, must be scary listening tae me! Also if caged in, will watch The Time Travellers Wife, Jon Carter, any All Time Favourite.

    A rare meaningful hug would be great but that's something I don't know anything much about.

    My The One, I dated for a very short while died. So I know how really special shite things can be. Saw a look-alike on TV... Wanted to turn off but at work, silent torture.

    The smallest of daily goals Always the way.

    Pets are an asset. I have a rare hug with golden retrievers or cat at the cat cafe :)

  • Hi Bex its a horrible feeling isn't it you can't shake the depression and all the negatives. I don't know if it will help but I write everything down I try to get it all out of my head. Then I read it back, and if it makes me cry then so be it. If I haven't had anyone to talk to (and I'm a great believer to talk gets it out of my head) I've actually spoken to samaritans, but you could arrange to see a therapist or even speak to the Headway helpline.

    As for the guy write down all the negatives about him then look at them, you'll see he never deserved you, you deserve better. Just remember there is always someone here for you to talk, there's always someone who understands and doesn't judge :-)

  • Depression can be a very complicated condition with many things that can influence. My mood can fluctuate but it is mostly under control thanks to certain things I make sure to do and things I make sure to avoid. I have to take antidepressants which I've taken since I was 17 and they do their job and help stabilise my mind, without them I regress to a place where I'm not as active life can overwhelm, I can be tired but have trouble sleeping and even exercising is difficult. I don't know how exactly they help but I know my whole mind and body goes out of balance if I stop taking them.

    I also make sure to get enough sunlight as staying indoors can make me anxious, If I'm going to be indoors or in places where I may get anxious I make sure to do some exercise as I feel it reduces the crap that can overload your brain.

    Certain things make me relaxed/content without reason and piano-playing or producing music in any form is one of them so whenever I feel overwhelmed I'll do that. Anything artistic is similar in that they are calming and enjoyable and creativity is important after brain injury. We can get stuck in a rut where we may feel comfortable but not happy and it's because we aren't challenging ourselves anymore, we all need challenges however small. When we do something new our brain releases dopamine which is important for feelings of pleasure and is needed for learning.

    If you've ever stepped out of your comfort zone and done something you had feared and that familiar feeling of 'that wasn't as bad as I'd thought' you may get a hit of dopamine, keep doing that same thing and you'll keep getting hits until eventually you get good at it as you've then learned, but eventually the hits you get become weaker and it's because you're no longer challenged, then you know it's time to move onto a new challenge.

    I don't know if this applies to you, but hope it helps somehow. I don't pretend to understand emotional breakups but all I'm saying is depression is complicated and there are certain things that can add up and you can control.

  • Hi Bex - Jules here,

    I am so sorry to hear you are down (very down).

    What Barney said to you makes good sense to me, but i know when you are that down its so difficult to make that first push.

    Hope you do or that you are by now feeling a little 'lighter'

    Kindest regards

    Jules

    x

  • Hi All,

    thanks for your replies, they have helped (kinda) after spending the entire day in work stuffing my face fully of chocolate and trying to do a minimum work as possible, I went home watched an hour and half of telly then fell asleep for 11 hours before getting up to come back to work, I still feel depressed, I do have my craft group tonight so that will force me to socialise and I have zumba tomorrow which will force me to exercise (and be more social) and I keep reminding myself that this week and next week are short weeks and there is a long weekend instore (bank holidays screw me up) which Im guessing will involve me sitting my flat pointless browsing the internet or playing some of my virtual families (The sims 2) as its pointless me see if anyone will be around as every time I try no one gets back to me or even makes the first move.

    On Wednesday afternoons twice a month Emma and Lloyd run a brain injury café which I went to last week and Im looking forward to going to that (and I met some really nice people there) so the next one will be next week and I want it to be here already (!)

    When I get upset or angry (from my teenage days when my mum would shout at me for no reason) I have trained my brain to play music as that's what I use to do to distract myself and that is what is happening now but I still low and wound up which is frustrating me.

    and I have to remind myself that things could be much worse and I should be thankful my emotional problem is small even though to me its big

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