I had a subarachnoid haemorrhage...

[magdolna]

I had a SAH August '16 and I certainly would not recommend it. They coiled the aneurysm. There must be a good reason why I am still alive. It is my first year of developing a new way of living, it seems to me. It is one helluva learning curve and I still wish doctors had not bothered. I hope to get my driving licence back and then I could attend a local Headway group and share own experience with others 'like me'. I only hope life may get more joyful. I am old well before my time. I have yet to read of any other BI person who wishes they had not been saved. And they celebrate the day they were saved.

I do believe things will get better as there must be a reason for my living. I do trust in god and any divine plan but as I said the first year post injury is a time to adjust and to just try to get by...keep on keeping on. I found and still find solace in a book written by Maria Ross called Rebooting my brain - how a freak aneurysm changed my life.

This sounds all a bit negative, sorry about this...I could blame it on the BI but I won't. Secretly deep down I am still a person who is full of laughs and cheekiness. I am very blessed and have a husband who looks after me and is very glad I am alive.

I am happy to share and to be of help to others. Ask me anything you want but keep it clean! Maybe some day I might meet a fellow BI 'survivor' and we could have a good chat.

[cat3]

Hello Magdolna and welcome. I had a SAH in Dec 2011 and can honestly say that, despite the after effects, I've always been thankful to have survived. I suppose my main concern was for my son, daughter and grandson who were in a dreadful place for two months after I collapsed with the bleed.

I was unaware of their anxiety and uncertainty whilst in the acute phase and, even when transferred to rehab, I didn't grasp the gravity of the situation. But once I was home, they gradually offloaded their personal experiences of that awful period, whilst I had SO many questions I needed answers to.

It's been so hard for them as 6 months later, their dad (my ex husband & friend) suffered a catastrophic SAH which left him unable to move or speak. until he died from pneumonia. I have no religious beliefs but I do value my life, and I hate to think how my poor family would have suffered had I not survived.

I really hope you'll rediscover your humour Magdolna as humour (often rather black) has been the main solace for my family & me. I found that after the first 12 months I'd begun to accept the 'New me'.

Best wishes, Cat x

[magdolna in reply to cat3]

Thank you for you gentle and encouraging reply.

[gj124 in reply to cat3]

I believe I sound very similar to Cat. I survived a SAH in 2012 which has left me in a wheelchair. It has til now to get my new life sorted out but it is so worth it. OK I do get frustrated occasionally and l do have to show a lot more patienceI do have a lovely husband and son who r very good with me. Stick at it!

[magdolna in reply to gj124]

I am very glad to hear you have a new life now which was worth waiting for. You used the word patience. It maybe that is my lesson from this to learn patience as I have a tendency to not be very patient!!

As time goes my I do sense positive changes and moments of contentment and dare I say joy. They are so subtle that they creep up on me and I reckon are signs that things are improving as part of a healing process.

When in hospital and I couldn't walk and I just assumed I would need a wheel chair or sticks or whatever. As it turned out I did start to walk again...I just decided I would because I love to walk as a form of exercise. The muscles in my legs are different and not the same, but I imagine that in time will change. It is funny whilst in hospital you just assume you will get better from all the health issues and carry on as before like having a broken leg or something. A brain injury is definitely something else for sure. Best wishes to you and your family.

[cat3 in reply to gj124]

I applaud you gj for managing your change of lifestyle with what must have been great tenacity, and for coming here showing appreciation for your 'new' life. I'm still whinging after two weeks with a broken foot, so your gratitude for survival has put some serious perspective into my situation !

Sincere best wishes to you and your husband, Love from Cat xx