I'm new here....

[Imaginari]

Hi all,

I am the mother of 2 boys with ABI. The younger one from a RTI 71/2 years ago and almost ready to come home finally. The elder one banged his head on a pavement 17 months ago and had decompressive surgery/ craniotomy.

The eldest is due for cranioplasty on Dec 21st and I was wondering how long after Surgery is the stay in hospital? He doesn't want to be in for Christmas.

[Elenor3]

Oh my goodness. Welcome to you and you're family, and wishing you luck for the forthcoming surgery and the homecoming of your eldest child. This is a wonderful place to share, chat and discuss all things TBI. Look forward to hearing more about your situation as things progress. xx

[Imaginari in reply to Elenor3]

Hi Elenor,

you couldn't write my situation down nobody would believe it lol

I wish I had found this site all those yrs ago when Chris had his accident. When I was told "it's early days and we are not sure how things will pan out" I thought maybe 6 months or so and we will get him home. Never thought it would be 7/12 years! Although I think he is wonderful in how much progress he has made.

The boys are both so different in how their abi manifests. David the eldest is the most difficult to deal with but is in denial, and it has only been 17 months. Chris has a more positive attitude and accepts his life has changed.

Unfortunately David will never have the opportunities to progress as much as is possible, as he is an NHS patient and Chris, once he left hospital, went into paid for Rehabilitation. So I have seen both sides of the coin.

We were all due to move into a new home at the beginning of December 200 miles away but David has just been given the date for reconstruction on 21st. Now I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. Chris desperately wants to be in the new home for Christmas and David needs his surgery. Trying to explain the situation to him makes me feel like I am letting him down.

Is there anybody out there who can clone me?

[cat3]

Wow that's a tight schedule ! it's apparently 3 to 4 days depending on how well the patient recovers and whether they can perform personal tasks such as showering & dressing.

So it's certainly possible that your son will be home for 25th though he'll have a recall appointment in the first week for a check up, and another the following month for removal of sutures.

Please update us with progress of both your sons. I hope you'll all start seeing some real positives in your lives from now on...............it sounds like you could really use some !

All best wishes, Cat x

[Imaginari]

Hi Cat,

Thank you for the info, it helps me decide if I should put off the move until after Christmas.

Showering and dressing may be a problem though, we have trouble getting him to shower and change his clothes now! He says he has and will argue the point even though we know he hasn't He can't do buttons, zips, socks, as he lost the use of his left hand after the surgery. I think we could be looking at Christmas on the ward

[cat3 in reply to Imaginari]

It's a wait and see game for most people but doubly so for you. Have you talked to David's consultant about your dilemma.

He might be able to arrange for a transfer for the follow up appointment but only if he considers David fit for discharge from his care.

If your son's issues are long term then the usual stipulations for discharge might not apply. I assume that if David satisfies the staff that he performs as well as can be expected he might well be discharged.

Talk to the consultant Imaginari ; you might be pleasantly surprised. (I'm guessing he'll be out for Christmas !) Best wishes xx

[TiredNan]

Hello Imaginari

Wish i could clone you a few times so you could rest up !

I'm so sorry to hear about your sons, these are difficult times for all of you.

i hope that you all pull through these difficult times.

We are all different so it is hard to say how long your son will be in but perhaps a move for the new year might be easier on you all. New year new start.

Sincerest good wishes

TN x

[cat3]

Hi Imaginari. Just wondering whether you managed to talk to David's consultant about his discharge ? x