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Shut everything out

After a weekend that was good but went slightly wrong at the end. I feel like shutting everything out and just live in my own little world. I just can't get this socialising game, I understand it and the rules but no matter what I do i can't get it.

I have tried being me and have tried working on how I should act. Yet the only thing I seem to see that works is just being quiet and not saying or having any sort of opinion.

5 Replies

Hi capewell,

Iv had enough of trying to be someone different and just accept I'm me, doing the social thing is difficult for me so I understand where your coming from. Being and understanding you and accepting you is difficult more difficult than putting up this facade to make people think your some thing different, believe me I know as I was doing this for 30 years. People have to accept you as you are. If your quiet then your quiet it doesn't change you.

Love and hugs. Nick Xx


Quite isn't me but it just keeps the trouble away at work.


You seem to be placing more value on what others feel than on what you feel here.

We are each of us created as unique and different individuals. We can't possibly all like all of the personality quirks of all those we come into contact with. Life would be very dull, for one thing.

Nor should we try to fit ourselves in to some kind of mould which society deems 'acceptable' at the cost of being untrue to ourselves. There are limitations to that philosophy, obviously, the main one being that we should accord to others the same respect we would hope for ourselves. Occasionally we all need to bite our tongue or count to 10. But if you are constantly not being true to yourself then the only disrespect going on falls fairly and squarely at your own feet.

You are clearly feeling very upset by the weekend's events and your colleagues' reactions to it. You have become a talking point, and are finding being at the sharp end most unpleasant. But don't take it too personally: that is what we do as human beings - we talk...and almost certainly, if it wasn't you, it would be another as the focus of their attention.

The other thing we do is flit about, so as another has said "this too will pass". Your colleagues will find something/someone else to focus on by the end of the week and your life will feel a lot lighter without the weight of the attention.

You are who you are. If you like it, then be proud and celebrate it - including your idiosyncracies which make you a unique and therefore special person. If there is something you don't like, spend some time considering what you feel needs to be different, how and why. Then make the change. But don't hide yourself away in the box taped up with 'this is what others expect me to be/do' straps. That is self strangulation and can only ever do you harm.

Sending you blessings - go well x


I know what your saying and a do just be me most of the time. I just well its hard to explain feel. I don't really have feelings besides anxiety and angry.


Hi again :) have you thought about a referral to see a counsellor or neuropsychologist? Have you called the Headway helpline? Just thinking of other sources of support :) I understand how you feel - sending you a hug x


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