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Support please

Hi , well glad January's over , started with a positive attitude, going to do some volunteering , excersise , as m.e is not as bad as last two years ..then wham! ....

Disabled son gets his arm broken after an incident at his care home ( trapped in a door by carers trying to keep him out !)

I had to stay with him to care for him as care provider being investigated , tolerated his abuse , anxiety and anger , stressful times in deed seeing social workers , commissioners new providers ...then bam ! After four year my partner suddenly stops speaking to me and say I have to let himGo ...moved my son single handed to new provider , then got back to my partners where I,ve lived for four years to be dumped by text and asked to leave as he is moving on with his life ...won't talk to me at all ...such anterrible shock to my already broken down system ...luckily I didn't sell my house as son lives there ...so had to move out ...car got hit in rear o e day ..no damage then this weekend got ransacked ...CDs and chargers and a little bit of money stolen ,,,,where do I begin to pick myself up from all this Please ?

11 Replies

Oh my dear! i have no idea,just keep trying,clearly youre partner didnot deaserve you in the first place! i really hope youre run of bad luck is over! get help and support where you can and big vitrtual hugs xxx


Janey, I'm so sorry. Sometimes it feels like life itself has it in for us which can bring a feeling of doom.

I had one of those years in 2014/15 and I really sympathise. Please remember that there are some wonderful people out there ; you've just been unfortunate enough to have seen the other side of human nature which can be brutal.

I hope you can continue with your plans, and also that your son will be cared for in a safe place, thanks to your actions.

My best wishes Cat x


Well I thought he was one of the wonderful ones ,,,but he changed overnight x thankyou for your support really struggling today



My heart goes out to you. What you've been through in such a sort space of time.

All I can suggest to you is draw a line under the whole thing and lock it firmly in the past.

Hey why not adopt the Chinese new year as your New Year. You can start to rebuild then just remember to take on one challenge at a time.

Please remember that you are important and make time for you.

Wishing you a much better year ahead




thankyou so much x


Hang on in there !! Been there ( well, similar ) as you can tell by my posts..... I'm not in a great place still but have had some great support from people on here as well as in "real life" ( though those friends have no idea of impact of BI) ....

Hope you are managing some sleep and some fresh air - if not sunshine . I sat in the sun for half an hour today - neighbours may've laughed but I don't care - need the vitamin D ...

Keep posting and hopefully things will improve little by little.

Hugs xx


Thankyou , p.m me if you want to , really struggling with the sudden loss as am sure you are too x


Thank you x


Hi Janey

For now you may just need to keep on keeping on, very much firefighting, dealing with one bit of one problem at a time until the world stops spinning so fast. Do whatever you need to do to hang on in the meantime. But when the spinning does stop do go and see someone - counsellor, wise uncle, soul friend, whoever - and get some help to process all this...you have suffered the emotional equivalent of a six car pile up and will need support to deal with the aftermath.

i had a similar torrid time a decade ago, with parents going under financially, loss of a much loved brother in law just weeks before his son was born, father in law and sister both in ITU within weeks of one another and OH made redundant...that was October to Feb and looking back I have no idea how I remained vertical. But it all came crashing down about 9 months later and it wasn't pretty. Luckily I got help quickly and over time made some sort of sense (as much as one can) of it all. But if you can line that up, especially given how long it takes to get a referral for support through, that would be a wise move.

Blessings and prayers for you and your son. Hope the ME stays at bay too.


Thankyou ...yes before all this had a carers assessment and have started psychotherapy ,,,,my partner knew this was going to happen but obviously couldn't wait ,,,for me ! ..sorry to hear your troubles ,,,,people on here are amazing what they've been through and how they suport each other ...not like real life at all ,,,,bad day today ,, but tomorrow's another day thankyou for posting x


janey61 what can i say you certainly havent been dealt a good hand.

the carers where were they trying to keep out of ? that abuse sackable offence and it will also be referred to cant remember it like the carers bma

good luck for the future



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