A&E: Just got home from a&e from 4.30 today. For... - Headway

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debbie36a profile image
7 Replies

Just got home from a&e from 4.30 today. For the first time in 6 months i went hairdressers today and mark went to watch match in pub down the road with his nephew.

I just got home at 3 to a call to say mark had what he thought was a blackout.

I went to get him and he's happily watching the footie.

Took him to hospital and it seems he's had a short fit.

I knew when nephew said his eyes rolled and he dropped. Luckily onto a sofa behind him.

He's being referred to neuro clinic for seizures.

I only left him for a short while. ....😢

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debbie36a profile image
debbie36a
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7 Replies
RogerCMerriman profile image
RogerCMerriman

ack, firstly it's not your fault, it's sadly a risk after a Brain Injury, one so far i've luckly missed.

look after your self and not to worry.

Dorsetcharlie profile image
Dorsetcharlie

Sometimes it feels like a vendetta, doesn't it?! Every time I tried to have time away in the first year there was some drama or other (sepsis, falls, seizures...). I know it feels relentless, but don't let it stop you from carving out time for yourself, it's so very, very important.

C xxxx

StrawberryCream profile image
StrawberryCream

You haven't done anything wrong and couldn't have prevented what happened even if you were there. It all went ok and he had someone else, his nephew, with him. You cannot be by his side 24/7 as life goes on and you have things you have to do that will mean he will be left at times by you. As Roger said - fits are inevitable for some after a bi although many develop them just because they happen. Please don't see this as another failure in your ability to manage Marks difficulties because fits are unpredictable and can happen at all times in and in all places and sometimes with people around and sometimes not. The only advice I would suggest is that if he is able too that Mark does not have a bath if no one else is in the house.

You are seeing everything as 'your failure' at the moment and you need to seek help for yourself because you are going to have a breakdown if you continue to blame yourself for everything.

Best wishes x

moo196 profile image
moo196

Morning Debbie

just to say agree with the others - you can't be with him 24/7 and even if you HAD been there , couldn't have done anything to prevent a seizure. Sounds like he was in good hands and had someone there to care for him.

I had two seizures which alerted us to my BI - first time was totally alone and banged my head on radiator on the way down - second time next day was so glad I was laying on the sofa chatting to a friend so at least didn't do myself more damage. When I asked ( when I remembered to ask ) if there was anything I could do to prevent them was told no - but just if I had ANY inkling to perhaps sit/lie down - but was told often people don't know in advance.

I hope the seizure clinic can give more advice and please do try to remember you have to live your life too ( bit like a new mum perhaps ?? you still have to live - my midwife reminded me that even prisoners get an hour a day "off" :-) ) . Take care

x

cat3 profile image
cat3

I'm sorry you're feeling guilty Debbie but, as everyone else has said, you really shouldn't. I'm sure it's because you allowed yourself a little 'me' time at the hairdresser. But this could easily have happened whilst you were at the supermarket or on some other household errand.

I think I understand how you're feeling though. For years I blamed myself for not being contactable when my mum died (had no mobile then) and she'd been trying to find me just before she died.

I've accepted now, that if we were all where we wanted to be we'd have to be in several places at once, and the world would grind to a halt.

I hope Mark gets the help he needs to control any further seizures. xx

debbie36a profile image
debbie36a

I know i couldn't of prevented this happening just adds to the worry bless him.

On the up side today's been a good day. Love days like this 😊

malalatete profile image
malalatete

Just a thought Debbie -when I had by seizures (2 in a fortnight 3 yrs ago, nothing since) it left me on a knife edge for months...always wondering if I would go again and whether I would get any warning. It might prey on Mark's mind a bit for a while, just to warn you. Eventually it becomes like the rest of the symptoms, just something in the background whist you get on with life, but it can take a while to get there....

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