Confidence/independence

[Matt2584]

Lack of Confidence and independence did play a major role . It still plays a part in my life still but it is not as bad.

Throughout my teens, my confidence was pretty low as I was new to my BI back then and I was trying to live my life like most others, big mistake!

I went to college for awhile, still with pretty low confidence but after college is where my confidence, along with independence packed it's bags.

About six years later, Headway came along, my confidence was slowly rebuilding again, great.

Although confidence has defintiely got better my independence is still a bit pants. I have spoken with a friend about this and they have given me a couple of ideas about raising my independence.

I wanted to move out at one stage, I was on the verge of doing it. I got into contact with some support but a part of me was just not ready to move out. I had the support I needed from me folks but did not have the space I wanted.

Maybe one day, I will be ready to move out... Just not yet.

[Hidden]

I think it would be important to have all the support you need put in place before you move out Matt. You should be eligible to have some one come in to help you with cooking, shopping etc.

Also if you stayed close to your family home, you could still visit regularly to help make the transition smoother.

[Matt2584 in reply to Hidden]

This is what I was thinking about. I found this website that offered support to disabled people wanting to move and they boasted about a team of top quality carers.

I would most probably have to live with a carer. My Mum or my Dad is always there if I need them and I would like to live near my parents house but the thing is, I cant quite imagine the carers to be as good as I think.

My Nan has a carer but there are not around for her whenever she needs them, they arrive at certain times.

The whole moving out fiasco is mostly to do with my older brother, he WAS still living at home but moved out on Nov 1st.

He is a hoarder and for years has done my head in by constantly buying unnecessary stuff.

He moved out some of his stuff in Nov but moved most of it out today.

There is still a few things he has to move but not so much and then his old room shall be mine.

I'vee had to put up of years of his nonsense, so has my folks. They have been very kind to him to let him stay and practically ruin our house.

So not too long ago I had had enough and was wanting to move out but like I said, didn't exactly want to.

I had to alter the way I lived because I couldn't fit everything I wanted in my room.

So now, I might be able to actually hang up my T-shirts :).

[Hidden in reply to Matt2584]

Matt ,i think you do have the confidence inside. Look at all the helpful advice you give everybody on here!

As far as getting your own place if you speak to your Doctor surely Im sure theyd put you in touch with the relevant people to talk to about this.

Some kind of sheltered housing with a carer might work where you'd have people with similar needs to make friends with and help each other maybe?

On a lighter note sorry but i chuckled to myself when you said your brother was leaving then 'his old room SHALL BE MINE'. I envisaged an evil kind of ha ha ha laugh at the end of it.Its just the way you worded it - i imagined you saying it in an evil tone voice lol.Its only cos you make me laugh anyway-in a nice good way!

[Matt2584 in reply to Hidden]

Aww, thanks for that Karen, :).

I'm glad you poonted out the "his room shall be mine" part as being evil because that is kind of how I interpreted it. (Interpreted. Another big word Emma haha.)

I was kind of thinking along the lines of Wayne from the film "Waynes world". "His room shall be mine. Oh yes. It shall be mine" :).

When I was thinking of moving out, I did think of sheltered accomadation but I most probably wouldnt have the room I want that way.

I wanted more room and my bro was hogging the place and it was not fair on me or me folks. This lead me to wanting to move out but I would missing my mum and the care I get.

[Hidden in reply to Matt2584]

Of course youd miss youre mum and the care she gives you. She must be a godsend as all mums are anyway.

What they would do if you decided to move out is put some kind of care plan in place and it would take lots of time and talks and nothing would happen without your agreement anyway Matt.You'd have to decide what you want is right for you.As i said you have got that inner confidence and youd know or feel if something is right for you or not.Plenty of time in the future if you decide to go down that line.

In the meantime that room SHALL BE YOURS your greatness!.enjoy! lol you deserve it!

[Matt2584 in reply to Hidden]

Aww, thanks Karen :).

I probably would think about moving out in the future but as for now, as my brother has gone and taken all his junk with him, I think I am in a good place haha.