Exhaustian

[Alice5]

Hi

Hope you've all had a good weekend.

My son had a SAH 3.5 years ago. He often feels exhausted, is this a common after effect or just life?

I'm learning a lot from reading your posts!

Many thanks

Alice

[amateurwriter]

Hi Alice, welcome to the forum,

Yes it does seem to be a running theme, my first week at home after my accident I slept and slept most of the week away, I couldn't stay awake, 3 and a half years later, I'm still pretty much the same but don't need a nap in the afternoon anymore, but I do sometimes fall asleep on buses because I get too tired during the day.

This is a great forum to find out things from people who have suffered brain injuries like me but also family members who have joined this site to learn more just like you have.

Hope this helps, Siobhan

[Bards]

Mental Fatigue is definitely part of the game for me and many others. To operate at a 'reasonably mainstream' level can involve a lot of effort even when that's not obvious to either others or ourselves. This becomes normal, so he may not always feel it coming,, but it may well be that the needle on his fatigue dial is always pretty close to the Red Zone (dodgy analogy, but it makes sense to me) and in need of a tranquility. There are quite a few short-term 'Om Mani Padni Om' type strategies to help relax when the pace gets testing; they may seem Hippy Drippy to him (they did me!) but do help. It creeps up on me both for short-term acute mental processing efforts, or cumulative where I've been mentally fairly active for a few hours/days; may be the same for him...? The more streamlined life is, the fewer balls in the air at the same time, the less overwhelmed life's 'in tray', the lesser the fatigue is likely to be.

See if your local HW/NHS have an occasional meeting where carers/service users/service providers get together to help with awareness... if they do and you mention the word 'Fatigue' you will likely get many knowing looks. Generally means the person is pushing themself, which is no bad thing if controlled, very rarely if ever in Head Injury circles does it involve just zipping up the Man Suit... if only!

I hope that's of some use and I haven't just brain-farted in your direction as a result of being a bit tired myself today

Bards

[RogerCMerriman]

would seem to be common, i'm closing on a year from a fractured skull and what not and though i'm now at full time work I still get very tired and it seems hard to attaully recharge.

[Alice5 in reply to RogerCMerriman]

Thanks, Roger

How do you cope with full time work?

[RogerCMerriman in reply to Alice5]

Work, makes reasonable ajustments and I try to manage my energy levels, and when I go into the red, not worrying and just going with it rather than attempting to hold back the tide.

[Alice5 in reply to RogerCMerriman]

Thanks, Roger. Good advice...

[cat3]

Hi Alice. It's nearly 3 years since my SAH and I've learned to respect the fatigue rather than fight it. I insisted in the early days that I would THINK myself fit and wouldn't let it rule me.

But instead of just bowing out (or early) from things, I ended up doing whatever I liked, then being laid up for days.

So I've learned my lessons and things still get done. . . . . . . eventually.

And socially I only accept invitations from people who understand that I mightn't always be reliable.

It's a very different story, however, for those with jobs or young children.

Has your son returned to work Alice ?

[Alice5 in reply to cat3]

Hi Cat

Thanks for that, everyone seems to be in agreement that fatigue is an issue.

He returned to work only 3 months after he was discharged from hospital. He has his children alternate weekends which he can find exhausting, especially when there is too much noise, the TV's on etc.

It sounds like you know yourself really well and have sorted out what 'works' for you

It's a continuous learning curve and I feel that we are only just at the beginning.

It's reassuring to know that others feel the same.

Many thanks

Alice

[Hidden]

Hi Alice

hubby also had a SAH 2 years ago & exhaustion is something we deal with continually, along with sleepless nights. His neuro psychologist says it is common, Headway have a great leaflet about it & we are learning to live with it. We still get it wrong on occasions (like this weekend!) & he overdid it, two sleepless nights, snappy evenings & all because we tried to fit in too much. He then will have two quiet days doing not very much & usually that resolves things, until the next time!

I think he also forgets that he gets exhausted, plus he continues to want to try to do things he couldn't do last time he tried them. Persistent but frustrating!

Best wishes

Jenni

[Alice5 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Jenny

I am understanding more and all your comments are helping, thanks so much.

When my son was in hospital I was told by the neurologist that they were doing their best to keep him alive and then the prognosis would be discussed. Because he made a 'full recovery' I thought all was well.

We are really fortunate that he is well but some things have changed. Initially realising this was upsetting but now it is a challenge to recognise the difficulties and work out ways to cope with them.

We had information from Headway right from the start but all appeared well so we didn't really take much notice. Now, even though I've only started looking on Headway in the last couple of weeks, the same length of time I've been on here, I'm finding the information really useful.

I hope your husband gets the rest he needs.

Thanks for your reply

Alice

[cat3]

It's good to remind ourselves, when we get frustrated and angry with our lack of stamina. . . . . . . . that we're trying our best. And instead of feeling failure, we should be patting ourselves on the back for facing up to the colossal effort it takes to achieve most of what others don't give a second though to.

Let's keep celebrating our survival and ability to keep bouncing back despite the 'down' days and the countless obstacles. Oh. . . . . and our capacity for very silly humour !!

[Alice5]

Indeed, that's a great way to look at it!