i am raging at the purile behavoir and words of some people

[ncmurphy1951]

for sometime i have been working on an idea for a tv programme / series of 3 about the challenges disabled brain injury people face in life the sadjustment to life after an ijury to the benefits system and the publics attitude to dusabled persons our careworkers doctors and the nhs housing options my only tv experience has beeen a few pieces to air giving financial and sports betting prices and associated commentry not knowing how to go about pitching tv companies i asked a question on yahoo in a forum for tv i received a sensible reply with intellegent and helpful suggestions but one from a willy by name and nature enraged me i quote " not a chance no sex and violence why are these people symtomatic of prejudice towards disavbled race and intellengence but i press on if only to two finger this willy

[bikerlifestyle]

the trouble is, the media are interested in in two types of disabled person.

the first is the type who does something amazing despite their disability and likes to push the if they can do it, what's your excuse bollocks, that annoys me.

the 2nd is the disabled benefit cheat (ok technically not disabled) but the sensationalism is there

normal people who don't either have to work in a sector for brain injured people or have a relation, dont realy care.

think of it this way i wouldn't be interested in a program about polio, not because i am callous or don't care, its that it doesn't affect me so there is no interest

i think it would be a good thing if you could make it. i am just not sure how

in whilst Willy by name and nature sounded like a twat and could have made his point much better, he sort of did have a point, sex violence shock and sensationalism sells, i bet if you cover inappropriate sexual behaviour after brain injury that would be watched by more people than one covering other aspects

do you know what, if you can do it, go for it and for whatever reason you wish to do it, at least it will give you a goal and goals are important, and if it doesn't work out, you can say you tried. what have you got to lose

i hope you can do it

[ncmurphy1951 in reply to bikerlifestyle]

exactly why i am proposing a totally diffent programme focusing on the disabled person and their daily challenges as the paralympics taught the world look at the person not the wheelchair of crutches of false limbs

[SAMBS]

'hey NC I'm with you all the way on this and also agree with with Bikers comments!

Come on let's join forces and go for it! Let us get PUBLIC AWARENESS out there, but let us also try and find a Celebrity Sponsor - sorry but Celebrities do attract media attention -and strokes and haemorrhages affect them and their families and lives as well!!

Here on HEADWAY - Our TBI's, causes of, and duration of survival thus far - are all going to be different stories. I come from a business background over many years qhwn I was Normal - whatever that is - and have fought many a cause in my own way over the years in the UK, but never with the media I grant you - until yesterday when I contacted by email a newspaper called The Connexion - which is based in France and publishes everything in english language for ex-pats - so let me explain further to you please.

I moved to to live in France with husband in January 2008. Things weren't good between us for so many years, so I left him January 2013, -obviously an extremely stressful time for me - because he stayed in the marital home - but in a foreign country I had to find somewhere else to live and apply for Social Security. I had aneurysm and brain haemorrhage 15 March 2013. He didn't care. I was married for 46 years end July and had my 66th Birthday 2nd August - I have suffered great emotional and psychological stress and problems from that day in March trying to live and cope alone. Even the French health authorities gave me NO support from day of discharge from hospital. So called brit ex-pat friends thought I should 'get over myself, they thought I cried just because I felt sorry for myself. Even after internet research when I found headway in June and asked friends- uk and ex-pat to look at website - the ex-pat ones didn't and were not interested. They were all too busy living their own lives.

I lost 11kg in weight from March till June - living on Weetabix only. I have no food preparation area or adequate cooking facilities - I have a microwave taken from marital home - a single portable electric plate on loan from a friend - a bed covered in clothes that stops me sleeping in it because the hanging rail is broken and collapsed, so no wardrobe to hang clothes. I sleep on a bed settee bought from IKEA on my husbands Credit Card and he is demanding full re-payment. We are both pensioners - he stays in the marital home WE bought together - I have to rent and 2/3 my pension pays my rent - I have to pay for elec, internet which includes now home phone - mobile phone and have no TV!

You want a story for the Media NC - yes I can give you one - and now I have to return to all above from 29 Aug - my 6 week period of recuperation here in UK courtesy of some very good UK friends comes to an end - and I am frightened by what I have to return to!

Return I must for medical check ups in September - and after that I do not know. I have to have a brain scan on 12 September - under General Anaesthetic -WHY - again I do not know - but I have an appointment to see an anaesthetist pn 6 Sept - so will ask why the G A. I have nobody I feel I can ask to accompany me, as the appointment letter from the hospital in Montpellier suggests I do.

Sorry to go on and on about this - my TBI is so recent and the cause and effects are also so minor compared to so many other people here on headway - and I apologise to you all - when you all really and seriously have genuine problems and mine are not a patch on yours! I wish you all well - but NC if you want help to get your idea off the ground please count me in - I love the internet and will research whatever you want in an effort to help!

TOGETHER WE STAND but DIVIDED WE FALL - !!!!!!!!!!!

[cat3]

You needn't feel despondent because of such a remark. Not everyone needs sex and/or violence to grab their attention but there needs to be some human interest (apart from disability) which the wider population can identify with.

I personally like to watch programmes about issues which don't affect me ------just because they involve people. But it's true that such programmes can be a bit 'dry' and hard-going for those who can't identify with the subject matter. Possibly, a good human angle would be your own life-experience when you sacrificed your relationship for the sake of people you loved.

If it were approached from that angle, to draw viewers in, then they would become comfortable with the subject you want to convey much more readily. Please persevere, Neil, with such a worthwhile enterprise. Good luck, xx

[ncmurphy1951]

thank you alll

look i am not dispondent what i have learnt thse 6 years since my sah is that the world is divided between caring people and ignorant scum who aree ignorant arrogant and daft there day will come when they are sent south from the perly gates

[B_S_A in reply to ncmurphy1951]

Woah, I wouldn't go that far...

There are only 9 or 10 horrible nasty people in the whole world, they just get around a lot.

[bikerlifestyle in reply to B_S_A]

pmsl this made me smile

[ncmurphy1951]

sorry i bed to differ on the number unlesss those 10 home in on me

just rewad or watch tv everyday who focus on greedy selfish wannabe important people who never achieve a thing apart from load up their bank accounts money doesnt automaticall equal nice pleasant nore successful n

being true to ones self and others polite and gracious is being nice and well respected

[B_S_A in reply to ncmurphy1951]

They do those things because they're unhappy, or not content with what they have. That in itself is their punishment.

Besides, that's what gets the best ratings on tv, that's why they show it. Most of the time, people are fine and decent I think.

[bikerlifestyle in reply to B_S_A]

i would agree with you there, most people are decent and caring

[ncmurphy1951]

thank you today i remembered a friend ex head of sport at c4 now runs and indepent production company who replied to say haveing lost his mum to a stroke and an aunt now severly disabled after a stroke he will tout it about after giving my idea some thought over the holiday boo hoo doubters

[Stardrop]

The right program could work, lots of people watch hospital/ambulance/police documentaries. Perhaps look at people with different types of head injury and different problems. Joe Public just think of brain injury as the drooling person in the wheelchair rather than the person who struggles to get their driving license back or gets told to apply for a shelf stackers job but don't tell employers you have a weak right side and frequently drop things and are unable to stand on a step or drag cages around. To look at critical illness policies that don't pay out as it's the wrong type of brain damage, and the Atos experience, not to mention the employer who prefers to sack you rather than let you rehabilitate as they bet on you not being able to speak at an employment tribunal. The wicked lack of outpatient rehabilitation. Pop in a bit of humour, another saucepan burnt because you have no sense of smell and appalling memory, or not recognising your own daughter in Costa Coffee, saying waistboat not waistcoat, living with not knowing what day of the week it is (or month /year). Loads of people have a friend or relative with head injury and would be interested, not to mention medical students etc. Go for it.

[ncmurphy1951]

thank you so much not that i like pfomoting myself as i have often been accused of when raising thousands for charity in marathons to the detriment of my body but as long as i alters the perception of the minor ignorant public that braininjured persons can licve a relativly normal life and not the usual tv diet of saliva dribbling mess of a human ill be happy have told my friend the producer i dont want a penny for my intellectual rights but if they sell to a broadcaster a lumpy contribution o a brain injury charity would be welcome

[Sem2011]

Hello Everybody

NC it is such a good idea to make a programme, but I do agree with Biker and somebody's else comments we have to capture the interest of Jo public, either with humour, or a concept that will grab the public's interest, or it will look a little dry. I am not suggesting we go down this line but some view the channel4 programme of the undatetables, .ie. people with different disabilities meeting for a blind date. Lots of people said it demeanouring to these people, but there was a higher awareness of these people day to day lives, and because it was different people watches it.. James Cracknell has written a book in which part of it covers brain injury, but to be honset I did not like the sensationalising headlines in the Daily Mail when he wife quotes he nearly strangled one night I thought I was going to die, guess that made everybody hooked, but reading the book,, it is an honest account, but on every interview she has given she recites this, not a positive message for everybody and why she feel the need to tell this. She says she wants her children to know the story. personally, I know my husband would never divulge our darkest moments to sell a book. But it grabbed the headlines, and being a journalist she knew how the press would take it. she writes for Daily Mail. Any way I am going off track here, but it needs something to entertain the public , but I do not think we want stories of when we overload or if we do I'm the right context. Before my injury I worked in human resources , and know how companies deal with long time sickness, how to fire a person without trying to not end in a tribunal claim, but sometimes not really being there for employees lot get back to work. So are though I am quite up to date in employ,ent law so if that cold help I would be more than happy to contribute. Not saying this programme should be about organisations sacking us :). perhaps one route to go down is the government wants as many people of sickness benefits but we do not receive the cenough rehab to fulfill this, but again this may be a little dry. I wonder what others think of my thoughts?

Sharon

[Stardrop]

I agree with Sem2011. Although I am grateful that I did not have severe brain damage, but only the so called 'mild' version it has totally screwed up my life and altered the lives of the rest of my family. I appear at first to be normal, but spend an hour in my company and my difficulties become apparent. It would be great to raise awareness of the signs of brain damage and what the public could do to help get the best out of us.

Many people think I snub them when my brain just doesn't recognise them now (faceblind). I worked as a receptionist where recognising people was important and was fired when I was at my lowest ebb, when I had just realised that I was never going to get back to what I was before. Being over 50 and female I didn't get the intensive and timely rehabilitation that many young lads who have smashed their cars up get. I'm still struggling to achieve a settled happy rewarding balanced life. People judge a person with a dent in their throat and a scar on their head as far more damaged than someone who has no visible scars.

If only we could train people to gently say 'you've already told me that' rather than snap because I'm repeating myself again, or kindly prompt me when I've forgotten something.