i curse in a verse

[zainey-lainey]

I look around and i can see

cheating folks all around me.

They may have been ill for a short time

but carry on claiming when really there fine.

Pretend to be disabled. milk the system a lot,

DLA , mobility car when clearly they are NOT!

When no one is watching and there guard is down

GONE are there impairments & along comes my frown

Whilst Us with brain pain would give anything for a job

to be healthy, normal & earn are OWN few bob.

With my own eyes i watched them defrauding the system

the benefit police so gullible & stupid to miss them!

Whilst us with brain poorly's may look quite ok

US TBI SURVIVORS HAVE TO PROVE WE STRUGGLE EACH DAY

If only the cheats could swap places they'd see

what it's really like having this disability.

[shellsbelle]

it really winds me up i had to fight for almost a year and getting rejected twice after my stroke just got my renewal pack and whats the betting i get rejected again even though since i have had a sah plus other problems

[vjones2 in reply to shellsbelle]

ive had a sah then day after op had a big stroke im left no use of half body and minds not good i ask person nae on phone i dont no who theyare 2 sces later i flooded my house 2 nights ago im in death trap at mo 6 hors of water not good

[zainey-lainey]

YOU CANNOT PRETEND TO HAVE A STROKE. SAH AND GO BACK TO HOW YOUR WERE BEFORE THEM. IT AFFECTS US IN SO MANY WAYS. THESE DECISION MAKERS NEED RE-EDUCATING. THE NEW RULE SHOULD BE IF IT IS DOCUMENTED ON MEDICAL RECORDS (FACT) THAT THE CUSTOMER HAS HAD A BRAIN RELATED POORLY THEN IT SHOULD BE THE PATIENTS CHOICE WHEN THEY GO BACK TO WORK AS THEY ARE THE ONE'S WHO NO WHAT THEY ARE CAPABLE OF. THEREFORE ENTITLED TO SUPPORT IN ALL AREAS. You poor lady .hugs

[shellsbelle]

thanks i have even lost my employment a support allowance because my partner works more than 24 hours i dont choose to be unemployed but they seem to think i do but then you get these people that fake back pain etc that get it no problem i would love to work and make my children proud this country has gone to pot and its people like us that suffer x

[Richdp in reply to shellsbelle]

I totally agree! It's a sham! if the people who sit in there big chairs making these big decisions could live for a day with the struggle, things would definitely be different and I'd be a happy man!

[DomRidd79]

I am not well though I appear fine to everyone else, i don't feel myself but thank him upstairs that i can still work and provide for my family...

[zainey-lainey]

so if you were to go totally insane..(brain related) and was sectioned it would cost the government loads to keep you in hospital and your hubby wouldn't have to pay...so why should your hubby have to take a cut out of his income to support you after a brain injury or stroke? It should be like child benefit. not means tested. the government gives each child an amount of money just for qualifying as a child..(for now anyway).. anyone with a brain poorly that was caused through no fault of there own should be entitled to an allowance because the brain is our main computer and with out it fully working we need support. FACT! or just put us down.. there not going to that are they?

Some things get better..some things can be fixed . The brain if damaged will always have something quite not right. ...When you are ready to go back to work you will no. but if you can endanger others because you forget to carryout something in the work place because of your condition then for the safety of others it is only fair they pay you not to go! teehee

[zainey-lainey]

last comment was a follow on to Shells answer. Dom you are doing a fine thing working and you no your limitation. well done hun.

[bikerlifestyle]

i hate benefit cheats with a passion, i wouldn't think twice about reporting someone.

i had a go at one bloke parked next to me, one time, he got out of his car (he had a blue badge) and ran towards the bookmakers, i shouted you really need that space then, and he hurled a torrent of abuse at me (he was a guy about 58 ish pretty healthy cuz he could run, i went into the shop and as i was coming out it just so happened he was coming back but this time he had a fake limp.

he wouldn't even look at me

i agree with the government that they need to look at benefits but they are doing it all wrong, the trouble is the proper cheats know wht to say or do to get through the system, its the people like us who are honest and sometimes for our own pride dont tell them everything wish i could get one of the politicians to spend one day with me, in my wheelchair and then impose problems on them that our head injuries do to us a good example i could do is give them a letter with each paragraph in a different language and ask them to understand that without help.

or send them shopping but not tell them what we need and they have to guess

or

put the tv on loud, have an earphone in one ear playing music and have someone ask them questions all whilst getting them to complete a simple crossword puzzle

or a way of even making them get dresses and getting up, and becoming exhausted just from doing that

[DomRidd79]

Thanks zainey-lainey I'm trying my best, when i first tried to return it was too much too soon and did a week an two days before breaking down and had to go home... My job asks of me to be thinking and concentrating all day and don;t seem to have affected my judgement or engineering knowledge at all, but i get tired and for a few weeks i have been having a kip in the car at lunch... I seem to make a day through and going to bed later, after getting home helping put the kids to bed, watching some tv... my days of going to bed on a saturday night at 8:30pm have past thank goodness... Hopefully this is a good sign...

[zainey-lainey]

Brilliantly put!. I think we would make better politicians! They should all do WORK EXPERIENCE! I never knew what it was like being in a wheel chair till my paralysis put me in one. so Shocked.. the pavements. accesses. shop shelves and on and on. was a real eye opener. Give an MP 1 week in a wheel chair. and that's just for starters.

It's a bit like a midwife who has never had a kid telling a mother who is pushing out a baby what she should be or not be feeling..er HELLO! eee I don't no... oh and thank you GOOGLE CHROME coz if i didn't have spell check you would not be able to read my rants! lol

[bikerlifestyle in reply to zainey-lainey]

haha good old google make my posts sound normal lol

i write it then go back to the underlined stuff, which is lots

[zainey-lainey]

Dom somethings are like instinct and you don't forget.bit like its a computer program that hasn't been affected.It great your engineering skills are still in there. I have lost lots of knowledge in my profession.But the instinct on how to drive is all there. Weird how it works.

... But as for the tiredness. wow you are so not on your own there hun. A baby sleeps alot as it's brain is learning and coping with alsorts. we are like that. baby brain. hehe

I have put on alot of weight since my TBI - lack of mobility and forgetting i have already eaten.ha...and i get tired after just trying to listen to my kids all telling me about there day at once. But when i say I am tired to friends and i just need a pit stop they think it is coz I am fat!. My Brain gets exhausted before the body.

Dom It must be harder for a provider like your self. If you didn't go to work would you feel a failure or less of a man. like you have a duty.So you have no choice but to try. I feel for you and admire your determination. Your Family should be proud of you.

[DomRidd79]

I think they're just thankful i'm here and able to do more with my kids, if i hadn;t been wearing a helmet it could have been a different outcome...

Sleep is very important in recovery I would have to agree, proper rest, no tv, no smart phone, computer etc... Closed eyes or eye mask, quiet... make your brain do as little as possible so it can use its resources for repairs...

[bikerlifestyle in reply to DomRidd79]

really wish i could slow my brain down, i usually fall asleep when i am exhausted, if i lay down my head is racing constantly and i end up overthinking over evaluating then get paranoid about thinks not being right, or over planning my days which makes the next day worse of something changes

i would love to close my eyes and be able to just relax i just end up being tired constantly

[DomRidd79 in reply to bikerlifestyle]

I have been like this biker, but sleep a lot better now, so hopefully its a phase that will improve for you, have you considered using some "Kalms", I found they helped me cope with anxiety and stress, but even that side of things i'm coping with better now so don't feel i need them, but will have just in case... believe they do a sleep one too...

I used to lay next to my wife, and be up and down cos she was asleep snoring away and i had a million thoughts going through my head, anxiety, paranoid thoughts, wishing to get better... I sympathise.

[bikerlifestyle in reply to DomRidd79]

my ABI was 17 yrs ago, and this has never changed, i have sort of accepted that this is just the way it is, i have every relaxtion therapy the nhs has allowed me to have (even some of the wacky ones lol)

lithium was the only thing that help but it turned me into a zombie

[coetzeegisela in reply to bikerlifestyle]

If I could, I'd post some calm, generally. We do enough for ourselves, though. How much do we exhaust ourselves and our unexpected lives and times? Always take (your) time.

[Flumptious in reply to bikerlifestyle]

I often go up to bed, and lie there, wanting to go to sleep. Then my husband comes up, and he starts snoring. I lie there for a good while longer. Then, I finally drop off. But I have had two children, and I blame them for the fact that I now have to get up several times a night, to go for a pee. Each time, I go back to bed, and lie there, thinking "I *want* to go to sleep!", but...

Then, the next day, I will be yawning all day. But when it is bedtime, the same thing happens again. Argh!

[Danslatete]

I felt the 'system' made me feel like a fake. I had ot jump thru so my hoops, had tribunal and walked out with the dla. It took about 2 mins for them to decide yes. The stress and anxiety was huge. Then they changed the ib i did qualify for to this esa. I didnt have the help to fill in the forms. I got it for 1 year because it was based on my contributions but then it stopped because i was not disabled enough. It took me months to build up my working hours from 2 a week to 1 a day thru to 4 a day and now 5 hours a day. I cant manage anymore. I am grateful to be in a position to earn again. I am more aware of my time issues and the lack of filter between brain and mouth etc... I am trying to be efficient but i end up taking stuff home because if i didnt then i would never manage.

I still have my disability, it wont leave me. Im terrified what i do after the holidays because it was a tempory contract that finished last thursday. I am doing the special playscheme in the holidays for 2 or maybe 3 days a week after the end of july i have nothing and i have not been back at work long enough to get benefits, so im led to believe.

Its bad enough that the family had to shoulder the burden of my care for long enough without having the added burden of no financial contribution from me.

Yeah mr government minister.....the genuine have nothing to fear...... My arse!

[zainey-lainey]

it saddens me they do this to you yet there are those who lie there way through the forms and qualify. Like i said before my love.ANY brain injury/disorder etc should get esa and dla compulsory and indefinite. The stress of just applying is bad enough for someone who's brain don't cope as it should.Mp's and such should read these blogs. shame on them! and much RESPECT for you.

[vjones2]

could not pu it as good but so right if gov dwp want people of money they need look at these id love able to do things i carnt do things for me let alone hold a job but ive seen moblity cars going 2 the pub getting friends out like a day out its rong