I know most people will be feeling the same as me and be upset and disheartened with everyone’s social media posts from Christmas and now all the new year posts about how amazing their 2023 was etc.. I for one have found it very difficult reading them and seeing them especially when 2023 was rubbish for us. I have had a close family member announce they were pregnant at the same time our IVF round failed and have just spent the evening with them while everyone was fussing around her, while I stood in the kitchen alone and cooking for everyone with no good news and just wanting to cry.
But anyway I hope you all have a wonderful 2024 and hope you all get best news you all deserve ❤️
Written by
Brie889
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I hear you! I also had another family member announce a pregnancy (and even state she wasn’t that bothered about it all!) over Xmas and had a BFN this morning.
I’m trying to muster up those positive vibes for too - 2024 is yet to come and had all the potential to be our lucky year! X
That’s the worst when people are like oh we weren’t even that bothered 😕 when you are giving it your all, emotionally, physically, mentally and financially! Sending positive vibes your way! Xxx
Absolutely feel the same as you all . I’m on day 1 of my meds for frozen transfer . This is the only place I can vent my feelings . My husband nearly lost the plot over our last transfer and I don’t think he even wants to try again . It’s horrible not wanting to get your hopes up too much but then wanting to be positive . We are all in the same boat ❤️❤️ xxxx
I agree! It’s sometimes tough as my partner certainly experiences things differently (less intensely than I do!) and I don’t think people truly understand unless they have been through it themselves x
This must be so hard for you. Do the family know you're going through IVF? I really feel that letting everyone know what's going on (including information about each stage and the hope/despair it brings) really helps them understand and appreciate what you're going through. My sister in law is pregnant and I'm so glad everyone knew about my IVF because I feel like they've all been really rooting for us. Xxx
Hi, thank you for replying. Yes they all know what we are going through and most know each of the steps we have been through. To be honest when we started IVF the family member who is now pregnant wasn’t even trying and had said to me that now she knew we was trying IVF it made her want to get pregnant, which is the worst part, I’m hoping she didn’t realise what she was saying.
They are all rooting for us too but it’s one of them hard situations where they are rooting for us and upset for us but also are happy for the other person. They have all been very supportive through our journey but I think our next round we will probably tell less people and mainly just immediate family, just because when it doesn’t work you have to tell more people the news over and over.
Ah, yeah it's so tough isn't it. Some people just get pregnant so quickly, and can never understand that feeling of years of disappointment. I really hope 2024 is your year, and that your baby and the other family member's baby are running around together in the not too distant future. <3 xxx
Hi, I just wanted to send you some positive vibes and well wishes for a better and successful 2024! I got a BFN on Boxing Day and have avoided social media since Christmas for the same reason as I came across many triggering announcement posts. It’s very hard and apart from those going through it people won’t truly understand. You’re quite right to feel as you have felt and you’re not alone. All the best for this year 💕we have to keep fighting on xx
Perfectly summed up exactly how I feel. 2023 wasn't great for me. Got pregnant for the first time (5th transfer) and had an early miscarriage. My sister-in-law got pregnant the same time as me and is due in March. It's a hard pill to swallow because I'm constantly reminded of where I would've been in my pregnancy had I not lost it.
Really hoping 2024 is the year it happens for all of us x
Hi I'm in this boat my first baby I lost and my sister was pregnant at the same time.Today she sent an invitation on WhatsApp for my nieces 3rd birthday party and I was like my guts fell out.
I see my niece all the time but every milestone just reminds me how much further away I am from getting my baby, since she's been born I've lost 2 more babies.
I'm 45 on Thursday and no it's never going to happen for us now so I'm having to really fight to show my face anyway this week.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope you find a way to get through this.
So sorry for your loss. Hope you will be ok and you are strong enough to get through this, after everything you have to go through with IVF and everything else it makes you a very strong person. I know it doesn’t feel like it but you are and this year will be all our year! Xxx
Aw I’m so sorry hun, I do hope you are ok and can find the strength to have another go. I have now come off social media because I just can’t bare to see it all. I have felt munch better because of this. Fingers crossed for you and sending hugs xxx
hi Brie, just to offer support and say I’ve been where you are and yes it is very challenging. I found it useful to temporarily disabled my social media and it definitely helped protect my mental health.
While I was happy for people around me to make pregnancy announcements, I had to distance myself from this and concentrate on my own journey.
I didn’t ever feel positive about IVF, I didn’t think it could work but just when I thought I had a terrible cycle, the only surviving embryo became my little boy, so it can work , even when you think the whole world is against you as I did.
Everyone told me to stay positive but I never did, I just tried to navigate the process and try and keep my mental health protected as much as I could while I went through it.
Everyone here can relate to how you feel, I 100% remember those feelings , please try and keep going and look after you as the number one priority. I really hope 2024 is your year x 🍀🍀🤞🤞
Thank you so much for your message and how your journey was. I have now suspended my social media accounts and it’s helped not having to see everything. New round starting at end of this month so just concentrating on that and getting into a better frame of mind, plus getting a few extra pounds off my weight to feel good 😊 xxx
It is so difficult and the social media posts are tricky. Honestly, if I see another happy family in matching pyjamas... However, happy news is that I shouldn't as we have another 12 months to get a positive outcome before having to go through the posts again...!!
Brie just wanted to say - I’ve lived and breathed this exact experience for the last 5 years. This year was my year, something I never ever thought would happen.
Keep your chin up for 2024, switch off and avoid social media. Ladies it will be your year and I hope it is for all of you xx
Feeling exactly the same Brie86. My sister-in-law announced her unplanned pregnancy 3 days after our failed round beck in June. We got another negative 4 days before Christmas. I haven’t seen the sister-in-law since her announcement (because she lives 4 hours away) & I spent the lead up to Christmas panicking about having to spend time with her. That didn’t happen in the end as we were all too busy hosting other people but she is due in 2 weeks & we will of course be seeing her then. I have no idea how I’m going to react to seeing her with her baby & how I’m going to buy presents & hold the baby. I feel sick even thinking about it.
At the same time as this is all happening, we are going to have to have the discussion about what to do next. I don’t know whether we can afford another round, especially as I’m 42 so the odds are so low. We’ve been putting off the conversation over Christmas but it’s one we’re going to have to have soon.
Back to work today though so I’m hoping that it will take my mind off the sadness I’ve felt over the Christmas period.
Oh no that is going to be hard for sure, we had to buy some baby gifts for my husbands sister in law when I first started my first round, at that point I didn’t feel too bad because I was only at the start of the round and was hopeful it would be me next. I have been able able to see the baby since and have held him and everything and I was ok, but I just wish it was me and my baby. My other close family member from my post that is now due in April I have struggled with the most as it just reminds you of where you should be had it worked.
Have the clinic said to you whether they think you should try again? A colleague from my work had 5 rounds of IVF and she had her last round at 42 and now has a 7 year old little girl so hopefully it may not be the end age wise.
All the best and good luck if you decide to go again ❤️
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Nervous..😩... Wish me luck plz. Updated ...
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