what next? End of treatment or try again

[MBD79]

We have been through 4 cycles of own egg and sperm through SSR then did one round of embryo donation

We had positive in very first round which ended in MMC

Unfortunately embryo donation was unsuccessful

We are thinking of ending treatment so exhausted with it all if we are honest

how have others managed to come to this decision? Is there anything that helped or did you come to that conclusion over time or know straight away.

Latest negative result from embryo donation was about 3/4 weeks ago

Thanks

[TrendyDove]

Hello, I don't have an answer for you, but I am at a similar point in my journey. We have done 3 rounds, 6 embryo transfers and only 1 BFP which ended in MMC. We have 2 embryos left and we are going to do a double transfer but if that doesn't work we are considering stopping. The emotional stress of giggling life and IVF, always looking at dates before planning anything, getting the time off work for appointment, doing pessaries in the work toilets at lunch time...and most of all, the hope with every transfer and the deception with every BFN... it's all just too much.

I'll be 41 next month, being trying for 6 years. Our specialist talked about surrogacy or donor eggs, but can't guarantee which is the best route and I don't think we could go with one and then the other... Too much money and too much stress. So we are considering adoption if these two embryos don't implant.

I guess the point of my super long reply (sorry) is to tell you that you are not alone, we all have the same doubts and that feeling of "have we really done everything we could?". In this forum I have seen people who can just keep going and try EVERYTHING, and I admire them, but we are not all the same and it's ok to say enough is enough.

[Kimbob82]

I just wanted to put in my two cents worth and let you know you aren’t in this alone and I totally understand what it feels like to want to give up. Only you can know when it’s time. We are gearing up for our 13th embryo transfer on Wednesday and I’m petrified that it won’t work (again) but I have to keep going because I feel like I still have some fight left in me. This will be our 16th embryo (15 so far have decided that my body isn’t where they want to grow) It’s so hard. Just wanted to send love 💕

[Chel91]

Hi, I'm so sorry to hear about your MMC and unsuccessful cycles. I've also had a MC and a similar amount of unsuccessful cycles, but now I'm moving forward after yet another cycle (probably my last one).

How many embryos did you get from your donor cycle? Were they tested? Sometimes donors have abnormalities we can't see, and another donor may just work a lot better. I made 9 embryos below age 30 and they still did not work for me. I knew something must be going on with me so on this cycle I did NGS PGT-A testing and I will do IVIG and immune protocol to give it the best chance to stick (as immunes can be a top reason for recurrent issues). This has always been an end point in my head as I don't believe there is much they can offer beyond this unless they find some kind of specific issue.

I'm hopeful this will be a game-changer, but my mind is already aware that at some point I will have to stop putting my life on hold and move in another direction to complete my family. It's not easy at all, but I wish you all the best in your decision 💗 xx