So disappointed ☹️

[Boo718]

We did a double donor round including pgd. We’ve just had the call to say 2 are normal and I can’t help but feel absolutely devastated. They wanted to transfer two next time so a huggggge amount of costs over ten grand for one transfer. 2 embryos …. That’s it 😢😢😢

I was hoping for 4 maybe to give us a chance to go back and do another transfer. If this one doesn’t work we are over ten grand down (on top of the previous years costs) and will have absolutely nothing to show for it.

I can get naf all with my own eggs and hubbys sperm 😢 how is it only 2 from young apparantly decent donors xxx

[Krystal_43]

Ah sorry to hear that Boo- but you still have two beautiful embryos and two chances of this working. I’m rooting for you! Would transferring each separately not increase your odds? Xxx fingers crossed 🤞 🤞

[Boo718 in reply to Krystal_43]

Aww thank you. I suppose I’m just having a whinge. We made the decision that this would be our last shot. If we got say 4 we would keep going back till they were all transferred then we would call it a day. So when they said 2 I was literally like … are u joking that’s crap. 🤦‍♀️😢😢 I’m not sure now whether to go ahead separately or together. To be honest I was soo excited and now I’m just over it, tired and trying not to think about the amount of money we have spent. We could have put a mortgage on a house.

Where’s the wine 😂😂 hope your good xxx

[Krystal_43 in reply to Boo718]

I’m on the wine after the follow up to my 4th failed round. Do we go again with our eggs, go donor or adopt? Such fun decisions. There’s not enough wine for this! Pouring a glass for you! 🤣

[Boo718 in reply to Krystal_43]

😂😂 there is Definitely not enough wine for this. Thank you, that made me smile. We are all fighting such a difficult fight. It’s like 2 steps forward 1 step back. I feel like the doctors seen my nuni more than my husband 😂 even shave my legs for her 😂😂

I felt that once the decision was made to move to donor it was such a sense of relief. We spoke about it on and off for months. Then we left it a bit and went back and spoke again. We got a lot of information about adoption and decided we would go for donor first. Who knows if it was the right decision but we weren’t getting anywhere with our own. They barely made it to day 5 and the ones that did were so poor quality there was no recommendation to transfer. It was a massive decision to make and even after todays malarkey I haven’t looked back. The important thing is to make sure you and your partner are both ok. Find a massive field and scream if u have to.

We’re all in this together xxx

[Nuszkahope in reply to Boo718]

Hi, I am sorry you are disappointed but you still have two embryos, that’s great! I would definitely do one at the time as putting 2 does not really increase your chances by much, also so many things have to be perfect for it to work, it isn’t just a healthy embryo, I wish it was that simple… so doing it separately gives you a better chance that one of the two times everything falls in place perfectly for you to be successful. Good luck with whatever you decide to do 🤞

[Nuszkahope in reply to Nuszkahope]

Just to add, and I do not want to sound like I am complaining or anything. Looking after a newborn is so exhausting. I knew it will be tough but not that it will this hard … I guess it depends on the baby but my little one is kicking our bottoms big time and I just can not imagine how hard it must be with two… I really admire people who are doing it…

[Orla9298 in reply to Boo718]

Hi lovely, try not to feel so deflated! Two does give you a very good chance - more likely to get a baby than not. I really would go separately with the transfers to be honest - they are too precious being your only two embryos, if anything isn’t optimal you could risk both. I really would do one at a time. X

[FluffyPink]

I’m so sorry to hear you are having such a tough time Boo. As Krystal said below though you still have two good chances 🤞🏼 We had no embryos at all from our first double donor attempt with a Ukraine clinic. It was heartbreaking- probably our lowest point with IVF as we thought that once we took our own genetic material out of the equation surely we would have success! We moved clinic though and tried again. We didn’t even do PGS this time. Our little boy from our very first transfer is asleep in my arms as I type. I’m 46. Don’t give up hope - maybe two embryos is all you’ll ever need. It is tiring looking after a newborn though so if you can afford it I would do separate transfers! xx

[Boo718 in reply to FluffyPink]

It’s sooo lovely to read this 😘😘 what a beautiful story after getting none in Ukraine. I honestly cant imagine the devastation that must have brought. To holding your wee one sleeping 😀 it’s just amazing. I know we will get there sometime and it will be ace xxx

[FluffyPink in reply to Boo718]

Ah, I’m so glad I could bring you a bit of comfort. We almost gave up after that failed attempt (my husband said he would have if I hadn’t been so resolute about keeping going!) Both really glad we stuck it out. I think two DD embryos is what I’ve heard is reasonable to expect from our clinics locally (and that’s before PGS…) so maybe it’s not such an unexpected result (probably just depends where you live!) I’ll have everything crossed for you. ❤️

[Boo718 in reply to FluffyPink]

Thank you. We’re doing the ivf in Spain. Come from Scotland but they are useless. We had a dd round last year got 3 embryos but they were all abnormal 🤦‍♀️ So we are lucky I suppose that they are normal but just such a low number. Hopefully one will stick and we can get the family we’ve dreamt of for ten years 🤦‍♀️And if not … we will work it out xxx sometimes life puts crap in the way just to test you xxx

[FluffyPink]

Ten years… my heart goes out to you 😔 I think if you have the resilience to keep going this long you’ll make sure you get your baby come hell or high water! I’ve heard great things about the Spanish clinics so I think that’s a good move. You are inches away from success now so just keep going - you’ve put in all the ground work to get you this far. xxx

[Corchi]

I would DEFINITELY do one at a time 🎈🎈🎈❤️❤️❤️❤️Good luck. My single pgs tested embryo is now 13 months old today 🥰🥰🥰

[Ell493]

The same thing happened to us. Only we didn't use donor sperm. We only had 2 good PGS embryos from donor eggs, and one was poor quality. I was shocked. Also like you, I didn't want to and couldn't dump anymore money into it, so we adopted an embryo. That way we had more to transfer when it came time. I'm pregnant now, on the first try. Don't know which embryo made it though. Could be the one we made or the adopted one 🤷‍♀️ We'll figure it out someday. I'm just happy to have a baby girl on the way.

[Maisie234]

So sorry to read this. I know how difficult it is. We had two young donors and only got two embryos as well.

I don't have a positive story from that round and I do believe it was MY fault as I messed up with the treatment. (Long story), but at the next round, I went with DD and frozen. Much cheaper, same result in fact some say better because they survived the freezing process and are hardy.

Also your clinic should be able to guarantee you a minimum number of embryos and get a reduction on a next round of you do that. They will , trust me they will work something out.

BUT you have Two! And you're not stupid like me messing up with the injections.

I feel positive for you, this is a great position, honestly. Good luck!! Xx

[AuroraXen]

So sorry you're feeling disappointed. I think I'd be the same, I'd be expecting like 5 top embryos for the money it costs! And as the donors are young, you just think yep, there will be loads of normal embryos. It makes me very disheartened sometimes, to see how few chromosomally normal embryos young donors make... makes me think, what chance do we have?! BUT having said all that, the fact you know both those embryos are normal is a huge deal actually. The chances if success with each one of them are really good, so try to take heart 😘 There really is every reason to think you are so close to the finish line now xx