Top Quality Blastocyst didn’t implant

[TTCWithCHSweetheart]

Hey guys.

We had our 4th fresh ICSI cycle and managed to get the best result so far. We were really happy and really thought it would work.

We had 1 beautiful top quality blastocyst transferred but it didn’t implant and we got out BFN yet again.

I’m drained from all the hope and so sad it will never happen.

I keep thinking about all the people around us with children and it’s really upsetting me. I know I should be happy for others but I really can’t bring myself to be.

How can I possibly get through this again. How can I have hope of it ever happening for us.

[Notarwen]

I’m so sorry this happened to you. We’re in pretty much the same position - two lovely looking blastocysts put back just before Christmas (also our 4th cycle) all went well it seemed and then...nothing. It’s heart breaking - every fail feels like a little bit of you dies as well.I wish I had a happy ending to tell you (hopefully someone else will have!) but wanted you to know you’re not alone and I totally understand the difficulty in feeling happy for others.

All I can say helped us was time and a plan. We’ve given ourselves three months to get in the best shape we can (physically and mentally) and then decide if we want to go again. Our consultant also recommended various tests to see if there’s a reason it’s not working, but for us I think it’s simply age sadly.

We’re in a much better place than we were at Christmas though and the pain of it all has eased a lot. Give yourself some time and be very kind to yourself and each other.

I wish you every success if you decide to try again xxx

[TTCWithCHSweetheart in reply to Notarwen]

I’m so sorry you are also going through this heartbreak. It really does suck.

I know time helps a little but every time it fails and we give ourselves time I just feel like we’re further away. We did so much we could this time and things were looking so good. No one knows why it failed and the dr was even surprised.

We are still unexplained and cling onto some hope but it’s fading with every failed round.

We have to wait a couple of months before we can start a frozen round (never had any frozen before so this is all new to us) and it feels like waiting is all we do.

We keep getting told we’re “young”, which I guess is true but you don’t feel it when you have been on this rollercoaster for 3+ years.

I’ve lost a lot of friends because we can’t cope seeing or talking to them. Some have been caring, others not so much.

It really is so unfair.

Wishing us all the best luck lovely. Every single couple wanting a family should be able to get their dream. Xxx

[Ranchu90]

I am really sorry 😞 to hear that. Unfortunately top graded quality embryos are not a guarantee just like poor graded embryos are failures. We also have one top embryo on ice from our 3rd IVF cycle (the only embryo from that cycle) but it is a mosaic one so we are not ready to transfer it yet. We decided after 4 cycles and 3 transfers to do some extra tests on genetics, thrombophilia screening, Hysteroscopy and others. We found here there few irregularities so hope this will be the answer to our questions. Stay strong 💪🤗 we will find a way to success ❤️

[Kookypie]

I felt like I could've written this post. It's so frustrating when you've done everything right. But take comfort that you couldn't have tried any harder, you gave it your all. There was nothing that you did wrong! It's cruel but it just didn't happen.

It's so unfair and you feel like you're in a kind of limbo. I think comparing yourselves to others is a killer. I often do it but everyone is on their own journey and even people with what looks like the perfect life with children probably have things they're dealing with. Well that's what I try and tell myself!

One way or another you will be a mother it might just be at a time or route you weren't expecting.

I've started doing a daily gratitude journal which has helped and might be a useful thing to do before your next cycle. It helps you realise all the little things that are good in your life. Plus on your dark days it's something nice to look over.

Xx

[TTCWithCHSweetheart in reply to Kookypie]

Thank you so much for your kind words. I really hope we can all get through this painful and heartbreaking journey soon without much more hurt. 💛

I like the idea of a daily gratitude. Do you just write one thing down a day?

Good luck in your next cycle lovely xx

[Kookypie in reply to TTCWithCHSweetheart]

Generally I try and aim for three things. It means you are consciously looking throughout the day for a number of good things and gets you on a positive slant. But you can just start with one to get the ball rolling.

Thanks for the good luck.

X

[TTCWithCHSweetheart in reply to Kookypie]

Thank you lovely. Il give it a try. Xx

[Shirazlover2013]

I’m so sorry 😞 I know that cliff drop after hoping. Incremental improvements in each cycle is a step forward in the big puzzle of why can’t we conceive but ultimately it’s a gamble of right time right place (right egg, right sperm, right endometrial conditions), most of which we can’t actually control. Keep doing what your doing to increase your chances, then you know you’ve done all you can, no regrets. For now though be kind to yourself, you haven’t done anything wrong. It’s just not fair 😢. Sending a super tight hug your way xoxo

[TTCWithCHSweetheart in reply to Shirazlover2013]

Thank you so much. People do not realise how much they help on here. Just hearing such kind words can make such a difference in our mood.

You’re so right about right place right time, it’s just so hard to accept how easy it is for others. We should compare but we do.

Sending a big hug back your way lovely xx

[RhinoCat]

So sorry to read this 😣 such a draining and hard process isn’t it 😞 sending hugs 💐 take your time