Looking for a little bit of hope - Fertility Network UK

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Looking for a little bit of hope

hertsicsi1
hertsicsi1

Hello everyone. I’m just looking for a little bit of hope. My first round of IVF failed, I didn’t even make it to two weeks - I miscarried at 5 days post transfer despite being maxed out on hormones. We had our remaining embryos tested and they had chromosomal abnormalities and had to be discarded. So after a rough round, I’m left with nothing and no understanding of what my options are. I have an appointment with my consultant next week, but I’m really looking for any advice from people who have been through similar. The embryologist said on the phone for my age (I’m 35) they can see no reason I wouldn’t be successful in the future - especially as all our eggs fertilised through ICSI. But I have so little confidence, and spent the evening looking at adoption options.

Can anyone offer any advice on what to ask my consultant, or experience from being in the same position?

5 Replies

Oh, I just want to give you a big hug! Please don't loose hope! I know how crazy hopeful we are going into IVF...and then the reality and disappointment hits so we fall HARD. I get it. I think most of the women here do! 🤗🤗🤗

Please keep your chin up and gear up for a long campaign hertsicsi1! I also had a chemical on my first fresh transfer. However, that made me so happy and excited because something had happened even though I lost it. I see it as the same for you - you fell pregnant! That's an awesome indicator that your body knows what to do! And in the future hopefully with some tweaks and the right embie you'll become a mom 😊 My nurses were so positive that a chemical is a great indicator of your future success with IVF because it meant you could get pregnant which means that now its finding the right embie and medical support if they feel that you'll need it.

I know egg collection is expensive and so painful. I'm throwing the cost of a nice new car at it each time ...and those frozen transfers cost $3000 a pop too. The financial burden is real. But we want to be parents so we're prepared to keep going as long as we can 😊😊😊 Each couple will need to discuss their limits and find peace with whatever decision they make. If you are feeling downhearted because of your chemical, please take heart. You fell pregnant and that means there are good odds you can do it again. You're 35 so that is also in your favour!

I hope that you can feel better and that talking to your clinic and parter can help guide your next steps. Biggest hugs and baby dust to us all! Xxxxx

I’m sorry this didn’t work out for you! 💔 5 days post transfer? did you miscarry or just get your period? Hang in there... xoxo

hertsicsi1
hertsicsi1 in reply to Msze

They found levels of HCG in my blood so think I must have got pregnant x

DianeArnold
DianeArnoldAdministrator

Hi hertsicsi. I do have a list of questions I can email you confidentially, if you want. Most won't be appropriate, but there may be a few you can use. If you want them, then email me in confidence to support@fertilitynetworkuk.orgDiane

Oh love I'm sorry you're feeling down. It's normal to feel discouraged! But you do have so many reasons to be optimistic. You've got age on your side, and if you keep trying you have a good chance of getting a good one eventually. It's so hard to go through all of this, but there's a lot of reason for optimism. Best of luck xoxo

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