Ivf journey is over: Hi lovely ladies... - Fertility Network UK

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Ivf journey is over

Hoping2019 profile image
38 Replies

Hi lovely ladies just a quick note to say my journey is over as my husband wants a divorce! Ivf isn’t to blame tho as he says he’s not felt like that for me in 4 years so it was never going to work as he didn’t want it to! Wishing you all the biggest luck and happiness in your journeys! You’re all strong women and I hope you all get a happy ending! As for me I’m going to move on and hopefully find someone who fancies me, treats me well and wants to have a family with me even if the road to get there won’t be smooth! Take care 💜

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Hoping2019
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38 Replies

so sorry to hear and BYE BOY! if he feels that way then he doesn't deserve you. you'll find someone that adores you and it will all work out!

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply tofeagfrhtfbhsvfadfva

Love the bye boy! My friends said something similar 😂 thanks x

bextoliver profile image
bextoliver

I’m sorry to hear that, stay strong girl! 💪

MissSaoPaulo profile image
MissSaoPaulo

Oh bloody hell. I hope this ends up not being the end of your journey to being a parent, just a temporary roadblock on the way. Just remember, you're stronger than you think and you're going to be fine, ups and downs of course, but you're going to move on and make the best new life for yourself. Don't let the bastards get you down xxx

Hollibob profile image
Hollibob

Sorry it’s ended up like this...

Not saying it’s right for you at this stage or maybe in the not too distant future, but you could always use a sperm donor x

Kyell2 profile image
Kyell2

I’m so so sorry. You must be devastated. Be kind to yourself and surround yourself with the love that you so so deserve xxx

Dreamingofbaby profile image
Dreamingofbaby

Hey sorry to hear this u. As others said it be his loss. Guess as awful it is at mo for u maybe best u know now and then u can recover and see what best for u in due course. Take good care of u Hun xx

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019

Thanks ladies it’s tough especially as my future is now not as I’d hoped but will be good not to have to tiptoe around someone and deal with negativity! Looking at egg freezing for now so no pressure to find someone and as Hollibob says there is always sperm donor option! X

CLDxxx profile image
CLDxxx in reply toHoping2019

The sperm donor option is the option I took, I have my embryos frozen and waiting. The relief of taking control is unreal xxx

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply toCLDxxx

Interesting - did you prefer this over egg freezing? I was thinking egg freezing as then potentially easier to use in the future rather than discussing with a future partner that might need to use embryos with donor sperm! I dunno lol 🤷🏽‍♀️ X

CLDxxx profile image
CLDxxx in reply toHoping2019

I weighed it up and decided if I met someone and we wanted to try then yes I have spent money I needn’t have but I’d rather not have any regrets and I have a back up plan ☺️

Egg freezing is more expensive and as I’m 39 I thought it wouldn’t be like I’m not going to be going ahead soon anyway but I do think it’s something to consider if you’re still open to meeting someone and want eggs aside in case.

I decided to do the IVF in May & wait until later this year for the transfer. Partly because I have commitments that I didn’t want to affect a pregnancy 🤞but also so I can pay it off before the transfer - I’ll need all the money I can get doing this alone 😳

The main thing was getting my eggs and I have to say as much as I’m longing to do the next step I do feel my body needed the rest after IVF so a frozen transfer will be better for me.

I hope you’re feeling ok. Feel free to contact me if you need anything ☺️ xx

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply toCLDxxx

Thanks lovely! I have a call with my clinic later today so will ask - I’ve seen online egg freezing has less than 20% success rate so may be a waste of time but maybe freeze some eggs and some embryos for flexibility. I’m 35 in a few months so relatively young but will be an older mum than I ever thought I’d be lol! X

CLDxxx profile image
CLDxxx in reply toHoping2019

That’s a good plan! Oh same! Thought I’d have a bundle by now and a fella 😳🤣 but it’s also nice to be the one making the decisions too.

I’m really pleased you’re already looking ahead and thinking of what’s next. It’s really positive ☺️ xx

crisps88 profile image
crisps88 in reply toCLDxxx

I love your posts CLDxxx they don’t half make me laugh Xxx

CLDxxx profile image
CLDxxx in reply tocrisps88

🙊🤣

crisps88 profile image
crisps88

So sorry to hear your upset, it must be the hardest time of your life. The fact you’re even thinking of other people in this group just shows what a good person you are and anyone would be lucky to have you. Like one of the ladies mentioned, sperm donors. Not that at this stage it’s something you’d want to think of but options are open. So sorry for you to go through this after your devastating news I really am. We’re always here for you, I’m really sorry for you. You’re really going through it and you deserve someone to treat you like the absolute queen that are. Xxxx

CLDxxx profile image
CLDxxx

So sorry to hear this, what a tough time you’ve had. You sound so very strong though and your journey is far from over. So many other opportunities out there that in time you can explore whether it’s with another fella or on your own.

It doesn’t mean having a baby wasn’t meant to be, but maybe not with your husband after all.

Be kind to yourself lovely and put yourself first. Do some lovely things and take some time out, you really deserve that. Sending you lots of love 💗

jengi profile image
jengi

I’m sorry to read this after all you’ve been through. You are so strong to have got this far, and you will find the strength to deal with whatever is around the corner. I’m sad your husband isn’t as strong as you but sometimes they just need permission to feel sad on this journey too. I hope the time away helps clear his head. You make sure you do something nice for you and surround yourself with someone who will look after you & make you smile. Try not be alone. Sometimes it’s good to talk even when you don’t feel like it. Remember we are always here! Xx

Noobs profile image
Noobs

I’m sorry to hear this. As if the infertility journey isn’t hard enough. The same happened to me years ago when I was in my early 30s but I didn’t think to freeze my eggs. Roll on 8 years and I’m in a great relationship with a miracle 13 week old baby. Keep strong👍, he doesn’t deserve you.x

L400ynd profile image
L400ynd

Lots of love and best wishes for the future. I’m sure you will find your knight in shining armour. You never know, you might not need ivf next time. My mum told me that her and her ex tried for a baby for over 2 years and it didn’t happen. She split from him, met my dad and had my sister without even trying. She had my sis in the Nov and her ex had a baby in the jan. It just wasn’t meant to be with them. My mum and dad were together 42 years before he died and had me and my sister. What’s for you won’t go by you. Lots of love. Xxx

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply toL400ynd

Lovely story - you’re right it just wasn’t meant to be! X

aamiller405 profile image
aamiller405

Aw so sorry to read this, such a hard time for you. But don't give up on your dream of parenthood. There are so many options available today xo

Sorry to be quite blunt... but there is always the option of sperm donor! Take away the pressure of having to meet someone! Good luck

Rainbowhope profile image
Rainbowhope

I'm so sorry to read this. Xxx

hifer profile image
hifer

Sorry to hear that. Obviously it wasn’t meant to be with him. Sending you lots of love to be able to move on x

mimisquiz77 profile image
mimisquiz77

Oh no I am so sorry to hear that... all my thoughts are with you. And yes you will find someone who will fancy you and treat you like a princess because you are worth it. Take care x

JojoWash profile image
JojoWash

Omg, what a bastard! For four years! I’m so sorry this has happened.

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply toJojoWash

Hehe love the response 😂 x

Sammyd1 profile image
Sammyd1

4 years? What a selfish idiot. Although i am sorry for you it seems you will be better off. My ex did the same its heartbreaking at first. One thing I have learnt while doing ivf is you DO NOT need a man to have a baby. Many women have gone through it alone. Hell even now I think it would be easier to do it on my own lol. I have 4 embies frozen but will start ivf again but not have them fertilised if my partner and I split then I can still use my eggs.

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply toSammyd1

Thanks hun yes I’m wondering now if I should consider donor sperm and freeze embryos not eggs maybe do both lol! Def don’t need a man for a baby these days but would be nice to have a family with the right man for me! X

Hope4usall profile image
Hope4usall

I am so sorry to read this but you sound extremely strong. He doesn't deserve you and one day you will meet the man of your dreams and hopefully have the family of your dreams too. Take care of yourself xx

Amandaholland85 profile image
Amandaholland85

Hi hoping can i just say its his loss. The same thing happened to me i was not married but together for 14 years and i made the decision to go to Greece to do it alone and use a spam doner and i have a gorgeous little girl and she is 11 days old and it was the best decision i ever made best of luck xx

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply toAmandaholland85

Lovely to hear and congratulations!!! X

Elynn profile image
Elynn

I'm so sorry to hear this. So proud of your attitude, stay strong, keep your heart focused on the truth you are lovely and lovable. Go find your love.

Hoping2019 profile image
Hoping2019 in reply toElynn

Thanks at this stage I’m just glad to be away from negativity, keen to wrap up divorce ASAP and then see what the world of online dating has to offer whilst debating sperm donor route! Lots of options which is the best thing! X

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Im so sorry things have turned out this way for you both! Wishing you all the best on your journey ahead!xx

Shelleybean profile image
Shelleybean

So sorry, you really are having such a rough ride. It’s really sad this has happened, but it does sound like you’ll be better off without him.

A friend of mine went through years of recurrent miscarriage, then the pretty gruelling adoption process, only for her husband to leave her a year after they got their little girl. She’s now finding the co-parenting side of things more difficult than she found the rest of it, mainly as he’s behaving like a total dick.

Although it may feel like your whole world has just imploded, you can now build something better for yourself and your new family (however that is formed) in the future. It’s going to take a lot of strength and courage, but you can do it 💪 💪

Lots of love to you 💖 xx

So sorry to hear that although I hope this means there’ll be a better and brighter future for you with someone new. Best of luck. X

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