Sensitive question

[staaa88]

Evening all, I’m really sorry if this causes any offence, I wanted to ask this group rather than a group. I’m currently 9 weeks pregnant after our first round of IVF, we’ve had a 7 week scan with a good heartbeat. But I still sit here absolutely panicked that something bad will happen. I think it’s a combo of having hardly any symptoms and that I just can’t believe I can be pregnant after all this time. Am I being ridiculous? Is there a chance of a missed miscarriage?

[Hidden]

You are not ridiculous at all. I felt like that during my whole pregnancy. I couldn’t quite believe it had worked. I had a previous miscarriage so was super anxious plus had barely any symptoms didn’t help either. Hopefully once you reach 12 weeks that will help xx

[staaa88 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, I just need to stop googling stuff 😩

[Hidden in reply to staaa88]

Easier said than done. I was an absolute nightmare. I felt very sorry for my hubby xx

[KW83]

Hi lovely. You're not being ridiculous, I know exactly how you feel. I'm 9+4 after FET, had a 'perfect' scan at 8 weeks but other than frequent little cramps and twinges, sore and definitely bigger boobs and occasional very low level nausea / heartburn I feel totally normal. It's terrifying - every time I go for a wee I find myself checking for blood even though I've had no bleeding at all. I'm just trying to console myself with the logical thought that there is no reason to think anything is wrong. Lack of symptoms does seem to be quite common with ivf pregnancies (possibly because hormones are all increased before pregnancy even happens) and in my case I'm on prednisolone which is a nausea treatment anyway, so perhaps that's why I'm not feeling sick? Just trying to take it a day at a time and find a balance between not getting too excited, but not being utterly pessimistic either. It's really hard. Do you have your booking appointment / 12 week scan booked yet? My booking is a week on Wednesday, deliberately left it a bit late so that appointments are evenly spread, it makes the waiting a bit easier! I think we're so used to hearing bad news that it's hard to imagine there won't be any but in better moments I tell myself that there are plenty of people this works for, hundreds and hundreds, and maybe I will be lucky enough to be one of them this time. I really hope that's the case for you too. Hang in there love. A day at a time. Xx

[staaa88 in reply to KW83]

I’m doing the same every time I go to the loo. But like you, there’s nothing to say anything has gone wrong, I’ve done about 20 tests, a scan with a strong heartbeat, no spotting nothing. But I still think it’s going wrong! I have my midwife appointment on 6th June then I guess a scan at 12 weeks but it’s not booked yet. I didn’t know that about IVF and the symptoms, makes me feel a little better. Thanks for your reply, makes me feel a little less crazy to think someone else is feeling the same.

[destiny121]

I believe this is totally normal and I felt completely the same. Worries every day and the anxiety was totally out of control. Nothing I say will stop the worrying... the only thing that kept me going was my morning sickness as something had to be there right. Just take each day as it comes and try to enjoy xx

[Jen_jen]

I’m going on 9 weeks in a few days and I’ve been ok most days but today I’ve had mild period type cramps on and off all day and I had a big gush of clear discharge which panicked me as I felt like it was blood. I hope 🤞🏼 after my 12 week scan I will really stop worrying so much and enjoy. X

[staaa88 in reply to Jen_jen]

Me too!!! I’ve had that for the last few days and keep having to run to the toilet to check!

[Kempton]

I felt the same way when I had ivf to conceive my son. It was a long old wait but we got to 12 weeks (was actually 13 and 6, so the longest possible wait) and my darling baby was just fine. Now he's a thriving 16 month old!

Hold in there. It's so easy to let the negative thoughts take over. I found writing a journal helped me focus on the positives. Best of luck to you!

[Southeast28]

Feeling exactly the same, will be 9 weeks tomorrow and I had been so anxious about it, we had a scan at 6 weeks which showed a heartbeat, then booked a last min private one at 7 weeks cause I was in such a state and had to put my mind at ease, and We had a scan Friday and a healthy heartbeat was detected. Iv relaxed a bit more since the 7 week scan. Iv stopped googling everything which has calmed me down a lot. Also not having that many symptoms and still thinking how can this be happening from our first cycle, but just trying to feel truly blessed and be more optimistic about it now. Keep positive, your getting there!! xxx

[ICSIBaby86]

I’m 11 weeks now and I’m only now starting to believe it’s true. I didn’t have any symptoms but since week 10-11 I’ve felt quite nauseous and tired, I had a scan yesterday and baby was wriggling and kicking away. It’s only now I’m starting to believe it, I did about 5 tests and yesterday was my 4th scan 🙈 I think we’ve been through so much and see so many sad stories that it’s hard to be positive, but don’t worry too much about symptoms I barely had any until now xxx

[AmbK]

Well I can understand your situation probably.... it's like when you've had too much odds on your plate you tend to ponder on the odds even when there's none. I'll not really think it's rediculous or weird on your part.... but this has to stop. You need a very relaxing time now that the baby is growing inside you. Your emotional breakdowns, mental instability, stress and everything will affect the baby. So please stop pondering on the bad that could happen and try to imagine that all bad is left behind. No there's hardly a chance that they have missed a miscarriage if the scans were okay. A pregnancy can still be successful without much significant symptoms.... google the case using keywords like "successful pregnancy no symptoms", "pregnancy without symptoms" so on and so forth and you'll find several replies, blogs where women actually had a full terms inspite of not having as many symptoms as to validate the pregnancy. Wish you lots of love and a great gestation ahead!

[Dotty224]

I could have written that myself. I am also 9 weeks pregnant on my only successful round of IVF. I also have zero symptoms and worry daily that I’m still pregnant. Our scan at 7 weeks went well and I am just waiting to meet my midwife next week. I can’t tell you the amount of pregnancy tests I’ve done to keep convincing myself that this is all real. Hopefully once we have hit the 12 week mark and have our next scan it will become real!

Good luck xx

[Muppetgirl]

I am exactly the same. I am 8 weeks and tomorrow I have the first scan. Scared to have it - longing to see that lil heartbeat. Thanks for reassuring me. Hope others have a reassured you.

[Hidden]

I think all your feelings and thoughts are absolutely right to be as you have fought so hard to get where you are but this is it and you must enjoy it and not stress yourself! Easier said than done I’m the biggest stress head! I’m gearing up for another cycle fingers crossed xx keep the faith and hope. it’s happening and it’s going to be magical ❤️

[Violet5451]

I was exactly the same all the way until I was in labour. Try to enjoy it as much as you can but ultimately you will worry and that's natural too. Xxx

[Babywaiting]

I am 9 weeks on Wednesday and feel exactly the same. No symptoms what do ever. Had a big bleed at all week during week 6. Had a scan at end of that week and saw a good strong heart beat. Still looking for blood every 5 minutes! I have a scan on 7th June and will be 10.5 weeks. I have had two other babies via ivf, one I bled with like this one and one I didn't. Both pregnancies the worry was there all the way through. With ivf you go through so much before you even see that double line it is very hard not too. All the best X

[Lilly2607]

Hi, totally normal, I'm 32 weeks and still crazy worried I think after 12 weeks and then 20 weeks scans things calmed down a bit, and now the little one is kicking so that's reassuring but when he is calm I'm immediately on alert "Are you there???" I'm also on other pregnancy forums not related to IVF and most pregnant women worry so I would just say to you Welcome to the motherhood as from now on we will constantly be worried:))) congratulations on your pregnancy, you got your first milestone achieved with the scan so try to soldier it through to the next one!

[Hidden]

I felt like this too. Your feelings sound normal to me after a long journey. Mine wasn’t an IVF pregnancy but I did have a 7 year struggle, an early miscarriage in 2017 & 3 surgeries to treat my endometriosis ( which got worse after my miscarriage) I also had spotting which added to my anxiety even tho I had a clear scan at 10 weeks after losing fresh blood with clots I still worried it could go wrong between then & the next dating scan. I’m now 39 weeks + 2 days. I still can’t believe that it happened for us!

The only advice I can offer ( it will sound like a cliche sorry) is to take it one day at a time you’ve got no reason to suspect that all isn’t well & for your stress levels it’s better to calm ( not that I am one to talk!) some ladies also have private scans in between to give them reassurance & if that would help you do that. Whatever makes it easier for you 🙂

It will get better once you pass the 12 weeks point but I think we will always worry until they are safely here ❤️ I still worry now something might go wrong even tho i know I’m being irrational!

Some women don’t get many or any symptoms but have healthy babies- my mother in law had no symptoms with her 3 pregnancies but had 3 healthy sons.

I didn’t have a huge amount of symptoms- breast pain, constipation & extreme fatigue. And symptoms do come & go which worried me but that is very normal as the body adapt to the pregnancy hormone & only get symptoms when your levels surge.

I hope all goes well & smoothly with your pregnancy. Wishing you the best xoxo

[Anumanse]

I am nearly 8 wks pregnant and I have horrendous morning sickness, which lasts all day and all night and I would love to have no symptoms but I do understand what you are saying about being anxious. Ill just say, enjoy this because things are most likely completely okay and having symptoms also has its bad side <3 good luck with the rest of the pregnancy.

[mimisquiz77]

Hi, you are not ridiculous. If that can reassure you, I was in the same position a few months ago. I am an anxious person and I have miscarriage before so this didn’t help at all.

I am now 29 weeks pregnant. Over the last few months i was so anxious as I barely had any symptoms that i had private scan, called the midwife for checking the baby’s heart and even went to A&e. But baby was fine all the time.

I am still anxious and check if I am bleeding or not every time I go to the loo but my anxiety has improved significantly with doing mindfulness, talking a lot to my husband and friends about my anxiety and since feeling more and more the baby moving. I still can’t believe it is happening though.its hard but it will ease.

Try to enjoy your pregnancy as it will go fast. I wish you all the best. Take care 💖

[staaa88 in reply to mimisquiz77]

Thanks so much, that’s really reassuring xx

[Ma717]

Hi we are in the same boat I'm 5w 2d pregnant first scan at 7w I'm super anxious what'll going to happen with no symptom except bloating,headaches, sore boos on and of and have plan private scan 6w I'm freaking out every second