Upset and frustrated 🙁: So I have just... - Fertility Network UK

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Upset and frustrated 🙁

SLord992 profile image
14 Replies

So I have just found out from my local ccg that after 3 months of waiting for an appointment to begin NHS IVF, that they haven’t actually received my referral from my doctor, even though GP said he had referred us back in February. DH is away with work at the moment, and I’m feeling so low, need support but don’t know where to turn.

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SLord992 profile image
SLord992
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14 Replies
TheSpeedyDiva profile image
TheSpeedyDiva

I feel your pain. It took me a year and a half to finally get my referral sorted. In the end I was calling the gynae secretary every day to hassle her. And then once I was well into my treatment, I got a call from the hospital saying “as you haven’t responded, we assume you no longer require treatment”!!!! I was like “excuse me while I go inject some more of the drugs you’ve already paid for”. It was SUCH a farce. I consider it nothing short of a miracle that I’m actually undergoing treatment. Not that it’s worked yet... I suggest you be proactive and aggressive without being unpleasant. Don’t ever wait for them to call you. Follow up EVERYTHING at least once a week and you’ll get there. Best of luck xx

SLord992 profile image
SLord992 in reply toTheSpeedyDiva

Thank you for replying. My husband is going to call the doctor’s surgery tomorrow, but sometimes it’s impossible to get past the secretary to actually speak to a doctor. If not it’ll probably be a 2 week wait for a telephone consultation! It’s just so frustrating. I think, like you said, to just keep on at them to check it’s all being done properly is a good idea. X

in reply toSLord992

That’s so frustrating. If you don’t have any luck getting to speak to someone ask to speak to the practice manager or write a letter or email to the practice. You don’t have to word it as a complaint if you don’t want to- just asking them to confirm that the referral was sent and if they could resend the referral and how it can be confirmed that it has been received.

Good luck. Xx

SLord992 profile image
SLord992 in reply to

Thanks for your reply. I will get DH to speak to practice manager if he gets nowhere with the secretary today. X

Saya85 profile image
Saya85

Oh goodness reminds me of my own story- I almost cancelled my ivf treatment before it even started just from the stress of chasing up hospitals and staff.

Keep on at them!! And u have more than enough right to demand to speak to the manager or doctor if they have cocked up ur referral - AFTER assuring you they had sent it!

A friend of mine found out they lost the referral and then whilst she chased up for re-referral she turned 35- and the ccg refused to fund it because of her age!

Utterly ridiculous - do not trust anyone with ur treatment. Don’t be aggressive or rude necessarily but do keep on top of it xx

SLord992 profile image
SLord992 in reply toSaya85

Thank you for your reply. Yes I feel exactly like that, just want to cancel it and try and work out if we can afford to go private. It is really stressful, especially when I’m supposed to be trying to reduce stress levels!

Yes I think we just need to be a bit more demanding with finding out what’s happening. X

Saya85 profile image
Saya85 in reply toSLord992

totally empathise!

However private isn’t always much better I’m afraid. Yes you have more control but not always straight forward either.

Don’t give up- have plenty of things planned to keep you stress free and geared up for treatment- it actually does get better once it’s started and will be worth it in the end hopefully xx

Rainbowhope profile image
Rainbowhope

I’m so sorry that the nhs are treating you like this. It sucks, it’s not your fault and you must keep fighting

SLord992 profile image
SLord992 in reply toRainbowhope

Thanks for replying, we have managed to get a call back from our GP tomorrow. So hopefully get some answers and this sorted soon.

Rainbowhope profile image
Rainbowhope

Best of luck Hun

Waterfall2 profile image
Waterfall2

This is the problem with the stone age system the NHS employ with all appointments. Get referred, be given a vague waiting time for a few months, then wait. How are we meant to know if our referrals have been sent or received. Then just wait for some form of contact, usually by letter, which how are you meant to know if you are still waiting or just lost in the post!

I don't understand why some sort of electronic systems can't be put in place. patients can log in see they are on waiting list, what position they are on the list to give them and idea when they might see someone.

Definitely call them and chase them up. See if they can maybe backdate your referral as it's not your fault.

All the waiting is almost the worse part of fertility treatments, i can't imagine the added frustration of having this happen. I'll cross my fingers you get this sorted soon.

SLord992 profile image
SLord992

Thanks for your reply. Yes an electronic system would be much easier, I have to access my test results from my surgery through an online app now. So not sure why they aren’t able to put referrals on there to. Oh yes the waiting around clueless is horrible. We are hoping to hear something tomorrow. I have my fingers (&toes) crossed to!

Lilli79 profile image
Lilli79 in reply toSLord992

I definitely think everyone should have access to their own medical records, including as you say referrals etc. Chasing them up sometimes is crazy too - lost count of the amount of times I've come against some snotty receptionist just to get results or info. My current gp surgery aren't too bad, my last one were so rude & unhelpful. I hope you get the answer you need tomorrow xxx

SLord992 profile image
SLord992 in reply toLilli79

Thanks for your reply. With my surgery it depends who you talk to on reception, some days are better than others. Thank you, I hope so to. X

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