Fertility Network UK

Children in fertility clinics?

What does everyone else think to this? We have just got back from an early scan and thank God everything was OK. Before we went in a woman had gone with her husband, mother and young son. The mother and child then came out waving a scan picture around and she was saying how he was going to have a baby brother or sister. I suppose more the mothers fault. I just thought how insensitive as there was a whole room of couples clearly waiting to be seen.

I just remember back to our miscarriage last time and when they confirmed it. The last thing I would want to see is a child running around the waiting room with a scan picture. If anything, I wanted a quick escape through the back door from all the crying. I get some parents struggle with childcare which is fair enough and I know people's family are over the moon but at a fertility clinic it isn't always a happy ending for everyone and think people should try and remember that and be a bit more sensitive to other people's feelings

9 Replies

I understand why you felt a bit uncomfortable but I think it's lovely when parents try and get their other children involved from the start. My niece knew about the baby in her mummy's tummy before I did (we're talking 6 weeks lol). I guess it's easier to get an only child involved earlier on than deal with the kid not understanding once the baby has arrived.

Not sure why the mother was there and I definitely wouldn't let a toddler handle my scan pics but I think its nice to see people's joy. It gives me hope. Though I'm not gonna pretend it wasn't like a dagger to the heart each time a friend announced their pregnancy.

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When I went to the fertility clinic once, there was a couple there with a photographer having a photo with their baby and some of the staff. I found that quite upsetting, but pleased for them that it had worked out for them. I also found it a bit weird that they were there with a photographer! Maybe they were famous or something!


agreed. it’s up there with those muppets who have just given birth smoking outside the maternity unit.


I think that's a toughie. Personally I saw a little toddler running around in the loveiest little dress with cute frilly pants on. It actually made me feel a bit hopeful.....in my head that girls mum had struggled yo have her and was onto trying for number two.....gave me hope and felt "one day, that will be me"! However on another day I may have felt completely different!xx


Hello dear. In the clinic where they are applying my treatment they are very delicate with those things. And until now I have not seen any children running around the corridors. They know how sensitive couples are about the subject and prefer to maintain the peace of their patients. Going through that kind of impressions is a bit of bad taste. Maybe people do not do it on purpose and you understand the emotion of that moment so long awaited by all. But also the discresion should be handled

That is why it is very important to know how to correctly choose the clinic where we will treat. Thank God I found one that covers all my needs and I have not had any bad time like that.

If someone still does not know how to choose their ideal clinic. I can help you with that. The first thing is tranquility and having an environment that does not affect us emotionally. And the second one a medical staff that covers all the standards,


I agree with you.

On a related note, I also think it’s dangerous to tell an older child too early- as a teacher of young children I see lots of little ones being much more anxious than they need to be, and for much longer, after being told they’re having a younger sibling when Mum is only a few weeks pregnant...and unfortunately I’ve also seen young children try to understand when their Mum has had an early miscarriage but had already told their existing children that a baby is on the way.

On the other hand, maybe you can take heart from your clinic’s obvious success in achieving pregnancy. Hopefully it will rub off on you too xx


Yes it can be super hard seeing these things. I’ve also experienced this, but we are extra sensitive to these things. I do always wonder why people are not considerate in that environment but there’s always that one!


I personally think it depends on the clinic some clinics don’t allow young children to attend scans as the scans are important factors of a pregnancy . However in this situation the Mum could of minded her grandchild while the lady who is pregnant went in for her scan and then allowed the child in. If child care is an issue then fair enough the small child has no choice to be in the ultrasound room. I personally also think that clinics try their best to accommodate every one and there isn’t enough funding to always do what they want to accommodate for xx


So pleased to hear the early scan went well!

I definitely believe discretion and respect is key in these environments. Sadly all too often the result of that first scan, or the first trip the the EPU isn't a happy one. I absolutely don't want to deny people their joy and happiness, but a little sensitivity to those that leave clinics without a happy scan picture is more than called for.



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