Physically I am feeling recovered (a little at least) from last week but mentally I know is a whole different story and I’m taking each day as it comes.
These last few weeks though I’ve felt so let down by ‘friends’ that I thought genuinely cared and I would of gone out of my way to help. We were meant to be going out this weekend but I don’t want to go and for once I don’t actually feel guilty for putting myself first, I said to my husband not one of them has text either of us to ask how we are so how could we just rock up to a party pretending like everything’s alright when it’s far from it.
On top of that my consultant wants to see me next week which I feel apprehensive about, I’m not ready to discuss any future treatment yet but when I rang to postpone there next apt wasn’t until March. My bereavement midwife says he’s been asking about me and maybe the apt would be beneficial just to catch up but I always feel so much pressure going. I then have some family members who are already bringing up ‘have I thought about surrogacy or adoption’ - talk about kick a girl when she’s down!
It’s my birthday next week and it’s another year I’m facing it with a heavy heart and more disappointment 😢