What I feared the worse....

And so here we are 6 days after our positive test, I would have been around 5 weeks pregnant, started spotting on Friday and was told not to worry, by Monday the spotting had gradually gotten heavier, went in for bloods and they confirmed that it was all over. Stop taking my meds and it'll all come away in the next few days, stopped my meds last night and since then the pain has been unbearable physically and emotionally.

We were told we'd be booked in for a consultation to go ahead for our FET as soon as possible, right now I don't know how to feel about this having spent the last 5 weeks being poked, prodded and trying to work around all our treatment for nothing but a horrendous period passing it all. This was our first cycle but I'm starting to think it may be our last, I'm not sure how you all keep going and do it again and again, I take my hat off to you all for being so strong!

[Tugsgirl]

Aww please don't give up yet! I'm so sorry for your loss... you have a little embie waiting for you, take some time out and don't make any decisions now. xx

[Hidden in reply to Tugsgirl]

I'm not going to make any decisions until I feel better, just can't believe how empty I feel, we devote ourselves to doing everything we can to make it happen and then there's nothing at the end of it, so difficult to process.

[Tugsgirl in reply to Hidden]

I know. I've been there myself two months ago. You'll get through this but yes it's very very hard. Thinking of you xx

[Edinburghdreaming]

Give yourself some time to grieve and heal and you may feel differently. No need to rush anything with the FET xx

[Hidden in reply to Edinburghdreaming]

I've heard FET is a lot more relaxed and not so stressful, right now I can't think of anything apart from just feeling like myself again for a little bit.

[Edinburghdreaming in reply to Hidden]

We've never been lucky enough to have frozen emby's but I've heard that too. I think it's really important to go into it in the right frame of mind and feeling positive about it so definitely take all the time you need x

[btsd]

I am really sorry for your experience. This is a nightmare.. really... I am on my 2ww and this is what I fear the most - either having low hcg levels or having an early m/c....

All my prayers go for you! And I really hope that you decide to continue and go for it, and make it and prove Universe and Nature wrong!

Lots of love! <3

[Hidden in reply to btsd]

Thanks, I know it was so early into the pregnancy but it doesn't hurt any less, just feel empty.

Good luck, wishing you all the best and hope you have lovely news at the end of the two week wait! Xx

[Sara_123]

Really sorry to hear this...keep going. I would say you are still lucky to have something frozen. I can understand your feeling and how hard it would be to cope up.But you can do like we all do....good luck

[_MrsC]

So sorry to hear your news. Take time if you need it. Your embie will be there if and when you are ready. Big hug. xxx

[Cinderella5]

Awww sorry to hear this! You need time to yourselves to grieve before you make any decisions! Take care xx

[louisear]

I'm so sorry to hear this and know exactly how you feel as many of us sadly do. Give yourself time. You will feel differently in time and able to make a clearer decision once things have settled. Best wishes xx

[Hidden]

Oh no .im terribly sorry.i for one know what the getting poked and numerous blood tests can do to your spirit .im currently on my third cycle and i have never haf a bfp.i cant say it gets better but you learn to take each cycle as it happens.iv been having a bit of a sad morning coz my mom in law is on about how we are not serious about getting help.we havent told her about our treatment coz of all the hundred questions she would ask.so she assumes we are not doing much about having a child.iv been weepy coz i had a scan today and bloodwork.i guess its the hormones .haha .you will get the strength and the hope to go for round two.for now just take care of yourself and heal.hang in there.xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thanks, its such a rollercoaster of emotions that we go through, and no one really gets it unless they've gone through it, this forum has helped me so much! I hope you have some happy news from your third cycle, wishing you all the luck, i'm sure once i'm over the initial grief and shock i'll carry on, but for now, its the last thing i'm thinking about! My due date was just after my 30th Birthday, we were so excited to think that i'd turn 30 and be having a baby, infertility is so so hard.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Argggh sorry dear.take as much time as you need. All the best.

[Sunshine09]

So sorry, keep strong ❤💋💋