Work worries...:  I am having trouble... - Fertility Network...

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Work worries...

12 Replies

 I am having trouble sleeping worrying about what's going to happen with my work when I announce my pregnancy...

Is anyone else worrying about the practicalities of maternity leave etc?

This of course is in addition to all the other pregnancy anxiety!

Just wanted to know how others cope with these work worries if they had them....

I enjoy my work - so worried my job will change while I am away.....

12 Replies
ClaireB24 profile image
ClaireB24

Yes! I’m totally delaying telling work because I’m worried about my colleagues reactions. I’m the most senior person in my team and I molly coddle them far too much so I know my mat leave is going to create a lot of anxiety. Im trying to take a step back now and make them more independent! I feel bad not letting them no now, but feels easier for them not to know for a bit longer. Plus senior management were less than supportive through my IVF process so I’ve no desire to tell them. I always think work places are so used to coping without people that they get by, and ultimately life is more important than work! How’d you manage with your first? Or are you in a different role now?xx

in reply toClaireB24

I had redundancy before my first baby so had worries about what work I would go back to - but ultimately being off work meant I was able to devote time to being able to conceive.

I studied in my 2nd trimester and changed careers after I gave birth.

Sorry to say - but glad I am not the only one worried.

My employer has no idea another baby is an option for me....so it will be a bit of a bombshell for my manager - who has been nice when they needed me to stay - but if they know I am leaving for mat leave, not so sure.....

X

Savvy_teapot profile image
Savvy_teapot

Yes I am worried. I just changed jobs with the risk that I was doing my IVF round. I just needed that change as had stayed in a job for too long I wasn't really happy in. Not telling them for a while as want to be happy with the scans first so putting it out of my mind till then. I hate how much I feel bad for potentially having a maternity leave. Everyone else has it and it is ok for them!

in reply toSavvy_teapot

Yes I feel bad too! It's terrible as we are totally entitled.

I am showing very early too now at 10 weeks. So will be a challenge to wait until post 20 week scan which is my ideal...

X

ClaireB24 profile image
ClaireB24 in reply to

Likewise. There’s no way I’m going to be able to hide it until 20 weeks. But going on annual leave for 2 weeks on Friday so will tell when I’m back and 16 weeks. As Savvy said everyone else takes mat leave without the guilt so why should we!

in reply toClaireB24

Yes so true!! I will be the same I think - but will hide as long as I can x

MoonbeamMcSwine profile image
MoonbeamMcSwine

Yup. Really worried. In the middle of training for a very stressful and responsible position which has a low pass rate and is predominantly done by men who have been there forever. Scared unconscious pregnancy bias will cost the role, or cause them to sideline my training. (Also feeling very guilty about how much time I'm having to devote to training, but that's a whole other thing.)

Sadly don't have any advice because still not worked out what to do and only have about 7 weeks before I legally *have* to tell my boss. But for hiding the bump, floaty shirt dresses and busy prints seem to do a decent camouflage job x

in reply toMoonbeamMcSwine

That sound so tough - good luck with it all xxx

Alienor profile image
Alienor

So I had told two of my coworkers quite early on, I believe after the 7 weeks scan. Afterwards I regretted it as I got scared my boss might hear of it not from me. So I told my boss couple of weeks later. I had hide my IVF journey as I thought this was personal. My boss seems genuinely happy for me. I’m 16+3, I did not need any special treatment and my work hasn’t been affected. I’m even thinking of pushing for a promotion.

Like you I was a bit stressed to announce this, and one of my coworkers just reminded me women get pregnant everyday and business continues to be fine.

in reply toAlienor

Yes that's so true - I just got a promotion so was scared my boss would be annoyed if I said I was going on mat leave. But you are right - it happens all the time. X

Mamabear2748 profile image
Mamabear2748

I’ve been worried a lot about work lately too. My best friend offered that potentially I’m fixated on work because it’s something I can control whereas what happens with my pregnancy isn’t something I can control. It make me feel better to think that my anxiety might be misplaced. I also have worries about what happens when I’m on mat leave because I will have only been at my job a year. I also know when I look back at my life, I will not regret choosing time with my child over time helping some company keep their lights on.

in reply toMamabear2748

Yes I agree - In the longer term a maternity leave break is so short and so valuable x

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