HELP at my wits end with my 3 year old. Disimpaction and withholding

[PinkBirdy]

My son has had had issues passing poo since he was a baby. He also had really bad cholic as a newborn. We were advised to go dairy free by a dietition, which we did for 3/4 weeks (myself too as I was breastfeeding) to no effect. All he was basically eating at 6 months was fruit veg and breastmilk. Still pain and screaming when passing. Going 6/7 days without pooing. Then the dietitions said it might be soya so we were to try again but the horrible symptoms still there. So the doctor said it's just how it is and when we have started his laxative journey.

For 2 years we struggled through with and maintenance does from the doctor and little advice. He would walk around crying, sucking his tummy in until a large poo came out. (still does this) He starteded soiling everyday too and then came to the conclusion that potty training would not be an option soon.

Long story short Eric advised disimpaction and after 2 weeks of gradual increase to 10ml a day of luctulose and 8sachets of laxido a day. It worked, he was pooing 1-2 times a day. Then he was using the potty for pee and poo. Until he started resisting and he wasn't doing anything at nursery. The poo and withholding started to build up again. I maybe out a little too much pressure on him. Then he started a new nursery.

I decided to so the disimpaction routine alongside a somewhat potty training as he doesn't have an issue about the toilet and will pee if he isn't uncomfortable. We are at 3 weeks with the disimpaction routine.

Maxed out on laxido and lactulose, pooing every two days with thick liquid poo like cement, not runny yet. STILL WITHHOLDING and soiling a bit. Really hard to get the medicine all in him AND offer extra fluids. Especially when I work two jobs and he has to go to nursery.

I can't help but get so anxious and even angry and frustrated with him. It consumes life at the moment. He is too young to really understand and can't express how he is feeling. Doctors unsupportive, not deemed an emergency but I think it is, it really effects his quality of life, he is always upset, very sensitive and reactive to things. As soon as he poos eventually he is back to his sunny self. I HATE this and feel so desperate and stuck.

Trying to explore the dairy free/soya free option but need a doctors note for the nursery to give him dairy free alternative and they won't allow me to give food in. The doctor won't write a note as they want to refer to the dietitions again, which will take how long!?

Ahh please help 😭😭😭

[Yaleamanda]

I would stop with the potty training. Get the pooing under control first. Add a stimulant to the regime to help things along.