6 year old who won't toilet train

[Pickle1971]

Hi

I've not posted before I have a 6 year old daughter who won't toilet train we have been having advice from the school nurse but nothing seems to work not they are talking about referring to the incontinence team has anyone had experience of this when I've spoken to my daughter she says when she sits on the toilet her wee won't come , she was breach for alot of the time before she was born , I'm just feeling overwhelmed and could do with some advice

[Yaleamanda]

Definitely go for the referral they will be able to help in so many ways.

[MrsDickas]

Hi. I feel for you. I’m not sure I have any advice but want to let you know that you aren’t alone. My son (nearly 5) can only use the toilet in the house (& only with his ‘special seat). He will say his wee just won’t come out. We feel like we have tried everything. He withholds all day at school and does sometimes have accidents. We are currently trying to ignore all the behaviour associated with going to the toilet. It’s difficult but we’ve been advised that it’s likely a control issue rather than a physical issue. We’ve had one appointment with the continence team. Not very helpful but really lovely people. We are considering paying for an assessment with a child psychologist. It’s so hard to know what is best xx

[MrsSquirrel]

Yes - go for continence team referral, they deal with all these things every day. They will look at her patterns of wetting and see if there is an underlying cause. We had an MRI on spine for example as our son had a sacral dimple where many nerves are concentrated (it didn't reveal a cause but worth a look). Keep a diary of when and how much she wees or has accidents over a weekend including night, this is one of the first things they ask you to do. They will try behavioural strategies (wee and whistle or blow - relaxes pelvic floor, or double wees - wee and wait and try again) before looking at possible meds such as Oxybutinin.