Hi, all. I'm new here but should have got involved much sooner...
My son turned four last month and started school a week ago. He's young!
Toilet training has been a problem. He started very well, and just as he seemed to have it down with no problem, he started a new nursery and it all started to go wrong. He was having so many accidents they cut his hours and we moved him to another, more supportive nursery who were great.
Throughout the summer, we met with the teachers of his new infant school and explained that toileting wasn't there yet, and they were reassuring and lovely. We very much got the impression that they were used to this and were ready to provide support. They phoned the day before he started school for an update. We told them that toileting was a little better by that time, most wees going in the toilet, poos only in pants though, apart from maybe one or two a week. ("Daddy, I need a poo!" is the most wonderful phrase to me right now! Rare and wonderful.)
A week ago he started school. Half-days for the first half of the week, then full-time on Thursday and Friday. On collecting him on Friday, his teacher informed my wife that they would be cutting his hours from Monday.
Needless to say we are all gutted. He was loving his new school, and sees it as a punishment that he can't be there for the whole day. My wife and I are deeply disappointed that the teacher (we've yet to speak to the head - will arrange to meet in the week) has made this decision, and so soon! To be honest, seeing as this is 'proper school' I didn't even think they were able to exclude pupils for part of the day over something like this. Can they do this? According to the ERIC website,
"A delay in achieving continence - or not being toilet trained - can be considered a disability. It is therefore not acceptable for a school to refuse admission to children who have not yet mastered potty training or are still in nappies."
Does this apply? The school isn't technically refusing admission, but they are reducing the amount of time they're prepared to admit him.
My son's toilet actually hasn't been that bad at school throughout the week! He's been weeing in their urinal with no problems, has had one poo accident on the Thursday and the Friday, maybe a wee accident in the week. They even said they don't have the facilities to dispose of soiled pants, so they'd have to be brought home in his school bag. Poor boy. As if this wasn't stressful enough, they're expecting him to carry around his smelly pants. I'm happy to buy them a bin!
Has anyone been in a similar situation? Can anyone offer any advice?
I'm trying to find out what the government legislation is on this (if there is any) and will be phoning the ERIC helpline tomorrow, and arranging to meet the school's head as soon as possible. Any comments or similar experiences would be very welcome!