Made to feel like a burden by GP surgery

[ltswd]

I finally reached out after really struggling with my pain levels and my depression. I called my GP surgery this morning, had to call 84 times before I managed to get through so all they had left was a nurse appointment. I took it because I’ll take all I can get at this point.

I told the nurse about the pain in my chest when I breathe and lie down, she said it’s because I have big boobs and dismissed it being anything endo related. I asked her to refer me to the endometriosis clinic where I live and she said “what do you expect to gain from that? They’ll probably reject you” which I couldn’t understand. I have endo diagnosed, I’m struggling with it, why would they reject my referral?

Then finally, I asked her to repeat my anti depressants prescription at which point she said “there’s another patient waiting, your time is up unfortunately”

I walked out in tears. I’ve been crying for a few hours now. I’m not sure if she’ll send the referral or not. I feel completely demoralised. When I said no one one was helping me, she replied “what it sounds like is you are disagreeing with what the professionals are saying, am I right?”

She made me feel so small. Like I had wasted her time for even being there. It’s really sent me spiralling into such a dark place again. I’m begging for help and I feel like no one is listening. In fact, I feel like people are angry at me for struggling.

[anderson29]

So sorry to hear that this has happened to you. 😞 Unfortunately, this seems to be a common occurrence for so many of us... myself included. I know how hard it is to be strong and forceful when you’re feeling low, but you have to fight your corner and be very matter-of-fact about what you want. Specifically name the consultant that you wish to see and print out facts and info on your rights if needs be... just please don’t give up. Put yourself first and don’t let anyone knock you down. Best of luck!

[Hidden]

Please please book in to see one of the GPs, even if there is a wait. If you aren't sure who to go for, look for one with the DRCOG and/or DFFP/DFSRH - these are postgraduate qualifications that GPs interested in gynaecology take. I'm sure any GP worth their salt would be upset that you've been treated like this.

[jennt0506]

I imagine you're not feeling like a fight, but if you have some in you - ring the surgery and ask to speak to the Practice Manager. They have to acknowledge complaints and will often give you an appointment when an issue hasn't been resolved. That kind of dismissiveness is not on, particularly in concern to your mental health, so please don't think it's okay or your fault x

[Catness in reply to jennt0506]

Yes spot on advice. Speak to the practice manager and make a formal complaint. The nurse needs to learn that is an utterly dreadful way to treat someone and needs more training so she doesn’t do it to a fellow endo sister xxx

I know it’s hard when you have absolutely nothing left to give but the only way I have got anywhere is because I just decided my own health was more important than ruffling the GP practices feathers. I go into every appointment knowing the outcome I want and just very brazenly tell them. I’ve quite often had to say ‘I don’t feel you are listening to me, I am asking for X’

Just know you have all of us endo sisters with you in spirit 💛💛💛 xxxxx

[jennt0506 in reply to Catness]

The nurse also needs to understand that dismissing someone so brazenly and saying you're out of time with regards to mental illness is potentially dangerous! The GP surgery should take that very seriously, it's a disgusting way to treat an individual suffering (be it physical or mental).

I've had to learn to say that same phrase / a spin off of it too, it didn't come naturally to me at first but now it tends to be on the tip of my tongue. I make it quite clear I know me, I know my condition and I know what I'm looking for, but it's physically and emotionally draining after a while for sure.

Us endo sisters have to stick together that's for sure xx

[Hd123]

I'm so sorry you were treated so badly.. especially by someone who is in a position of care. I agree with all of the above. Definitely go back and speak to a GP. Sometimes it helps if you have been before and know a specific one who if helpful or understanding? I had a similar experience and didn't complain because when I went back the next GP I saw was very helpful, however it may help you get an appointment faster and by the sounds of it this nurse maybe needs some lessons on bedside manners!!

Take care and don't lose faith.

X

[cmbxm]

A nurse wouldn’t be able to refer you anyway unfortunately, I’d book an appointment with a GP and contact your practice manager, like the lady above said, dismissing someone with whose approaching the subject of mental health isn’t right and possibly dangerous!! Sending hugs hun xxx

[JOSANDY40]

Yes I believe the other readers are making several good points. Phone SAM if your low. If the depression is on going perhaps start or change meds. I got suicidal before I finally got help. It was pretty terrible and very crucial. Depression still doesn't seem to be taken seriously. I was told I looked middle class, bright and normal. I had been a strong person but my Ex leaving, taking my money, taking flying lessons and me living in the walk in wardrobe, no heating, it was hell.

[emmalondon]

hi! quick reply. it took me a few weeks and going through 3 or 4 gps at my new surgery before i eventually found a sympathetic and proactive gp who actually listened. we have got to keep fighting!! big hug! x