Endometriosis UK
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What can I do?

Hi ladies, so basically this week has been a really bad week for pain, as well as my endo I have a water infection I'm really bloated and uncomfortable. I'm in so much pain with my back and tummy I just can't get comfy in bed. I'm on tramadol it eases it a bit but not much, I can't even imagine trying to go out but the thing is my boyfriends parents. My boyfriend is more than happy to stay in and cuddle and comfort me watching movies as he understands how much pain I am in I'm so lucky he understands, however his parents not so much they are always saying that we stay in all the time at weekends and we should be going out they basically hate that we stay in. But they forget how much pain I get in we've tried and tried telling them time and time again why we haven't gone out but they say if it's that bad I need to go a&e I'm scared they hate me and think I'm holding their son back but the thing is would love to go out but it's nearly impossible with the pain I am. My boyfriend goes out with his friends when he wants I never stop him. I just don't know what to do I feel guilty for staying in bed but I can't help it? What can I do? Sorry just on a bit of a rant xx

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Hi, sorry you're going through this.

Why are they so bothered?! Your relationship is between two people and as long as you are both as happy as you can be (around the pain of course) then what is it to do with anyone else?! Are they going to be as involved in everything?!

Maybe it's for your boyfriend to have a word with them and explain a few things. It's not easy but I told my in laws what I had and how it effects me and my husband is totally clued up on it all and tells them things if they have questions. He's the buffer between us, as it should be.

If you are happy in your relationship don't let them ruin it or put doubts in your mind. I understand fully that pain stops us doing what we want all the time but maybe make up for it on the rare occasions you feel you can get out and about. Go out for a meal or a few quiet drinks, weekend away, spa day together etc and spend quality time with each other like that. Or have date nights at home where you plan and cook a meal together when he pain is too bad to face the world. Have baths together and watch your favourite films etc.

It's no one else's business what happens in your relationship but I would be open about how you're feeling with your boyfriend and ask that he speak to them so you don't have to handle it. Good luck x

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