Describe the pain during sex: Can anyone... - Endometriosis UK

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Describe the pain during sex

nickmac1st profile image

Can anyone describe the pain during sex? Sorry if I'm going to be a bit blunt but I wanted to see if I'm having the same sort of pain as everyone else. The pain I experience is from the penis touching on something on the left side of my abdomen which I assume is the endo. Also, with each stroke my stomach feels like it's being pump up like a balloon which is painful as well. The pain I experience after sex is due my stomach being completely pumped to capacity (I've actually gone into cold sweats, and lain on the floor almost passed out from this. Thought I was dying). After sex I am in severe pain for a few days n can't walk or move. This bit is embarrassing but it has to be said. After sex, the next few days, whenever I pass wind the pain gets less and less, lmao. That is the only way the pain reduces and each time I'm less bloated. Is this just me? Is the pain the same for you guys too? Does your pain get less with passing wind (farting)? Please help.

26 Replies

Well I dont get the wind but sex is very painful for me and afterwards I am in agony. Im fortunate my man is very understanding and trys to be as gentle as possible but it doesn't help. I get the pain on my left side where my endo is worse. Hope that helps

Yes my pain gets less or more when my wind moves and then less when I pass wind. With/without s.. So ou are not alone. I get. It because I have endo on pouch of douglas/ rectum x

nickmac1st profile image
nickmac1st in reply to wp22

Thank you for replying. My pain gets less when I pass wind with other without sex too. I wondered because the doctor never mentions this and I didn't see anyone else in this forum mention it either. I dint under stand your comment "It because I have endo on pouch of douglas/ rectum x" though. Could u clarify please? Thanks again. I can not worry so much thinking it might be somthing else.

I always thought there was something wrong with me, as I've been with my partner for nearly 3 years and at the start pains were not an issue. But in the last year as my endometriosis seems to be getting worse it has affected my sex life. After sex I feel cramps and severe pain in my stomach and back. Although my pain normally only lasts 1/2 hours there have been times where ivthought I was going to have to hospital there and then! The best place for me is a hot bath that eases my pain if there really bad. The most important thing is having a supportive partner and knowing what positions are just not perhaps not suitable and inflict more pain. Hope this helps xx

I'm the same hot sweats shakey and feels sick I have endo of the bowel the doc thinks that's y mine hurts during sex

Endo in the pouch of douglas causes these symptoms including back ache. The PoD is the other side of the rectum, Inside and only seen when you have keyhole. It is at the top if the cervix but again the other side seen when you have a lap. When you get endo there eventually it seems to stick the rectum to the vagina a lot and it pulls them up out of place and this causes the pain when having sex. It also feels like the top of the vagina is bruised, another symptom. Also if you have a smear and you have endo on the vagina but the other side (inside) it can be seen a purplish mark, but only if someone knows what they are looking for, otherwise it is usually overlooked. I hope this helps and apologies if I haven't explained it very clearly x

Katrina13 profile image
Katrina13 in reply to wp22

I have endo in the PoD, and for me I have some discomfort sometimes but not too bad, the worst thing is (can't believe I am about to admit to this :-)) that I often feel during sex like I am about to fart or even poo myself. A few times I have leapt up and ran into the loo!! Hardly romantic. I told my husband eventually and now am a little bit more relaxed about it.

Fangalang profile image
Fangalang in reply to Katrina13

Thank god I'm not the only one! I have the exact same and it really puts me off!

I used to have a little pain but nothing like that. Have you seen your Dr about this?

Thanks for sharing guys. I haven't been to my doctor in a while. I was diagnosed in another country and the doctors here doesn't seem to want to even acknowledge that it's a serious problem so I've just been living and trying to cope on my own for the last few years. I think it's time I visit my doctor again though and get them to really listen. It's really starting to become a problem because any sudden harsh movements and I double up in pain. It's really sore. Thanks again

It's good to read people actually sharing real things. I've been trying to research anyone with the same problems I have, as I can't even really figure out how to tell my doctor of the pain. I was diagnosed with polycystic ovaries, which my doctor therefore assumed all the pain I was talking about and symptoms of endometriosis where cancelled out and fake. I've been back so many times saying something is wrong and I know I'm not being stupid. I've been researching my own problems for a long time now, which in reality, if my doctor actually took the time to listen to me, I wouldn't need to do.

I've spent 4 years trying to receive a referral to a gyno. And have only now just received one, although I now have to wait 6 months to get in and see someone. And my referral makes me sound like an idiot "she thinks periods and sex hurts. We told her that's normal. She refuses to listen"

From what I've read, the cysts don't cause the pain, but endometriosis does. I Have all the symptoms Of endometriosis

I have noticed that the pain has progressively gotten worse as I've gotten older. It started off being every second period or so. although my period is never the same, so I a lot of the time can't prepare for it. Then I had pain every period. At one point I had pain constantly for 3 months straight and had my period 3 times in 2 months. Then intercourse started to be painful too. I thought maybe I might have an absys or something and it would go away, but it got worse. Now even thinking about sex makes me shiver.

My partner is getting very impatient with me, he believes I'm not having sex with him because I either don't love him or am seeing someone else during the day.

I also suffer with UTI's, occasional thrush and BV

So as you can imagine, sex is super enjoyable! (If only) I'm not even confident enough to not walk around with toilet paper in my underwear in case i randomly start spotting or have any form of discharge from any of the 5 issues I have going on.

And what's even better, there seems to be little, to no cure for any of these things.

I understand now how many lives these problems are ruining.

Thanks for your quistion, and apologies for blabbing on :)

Are you sure you don't have IBS?

nickmac1st profile image
nickmac1st in reply to Katrina13

Hi, what is IBS? Is it somthing to do with the bowels?

IBS = Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Most commonly it causes huge cramping, trapped wind, constipation & diarrhoea. It is caused by certain 'trigger' foods and is common in women with endometriosis unfortunately. Basically, a normal digestive system works by your intestines squeezing (via muscle spasms) matter along from top to bottom, gradually and in a controlled way until it reaches its natural exit. With IBS, 2 things happen:

1, the spasms are indiscriminate so they push stuff up and down in an uncontrolled way, causing gas build up, and compression of matter. This is caused by gastric reflux, i.e. a trigger food will cause everything to go a bit manic for a while.

2, you either have too much or not enough mucus/water in the bowel. This causes constipation and/or diarrhoea and vast amounts of trapped gas.

I have found that the best thing to do is keep an eye on what trigger foods are causing you cramping, then try and cut them out. Also, look into soluble vs insoluble fibre, I know that for me really 'stringy' foods cause me loads of issues.

I could be wrong but the pain you have sounds like it may be from a build up of gas in the gut.

Here is some more info:

Good luck to you x

nickmac1st profile image
nickmac1st in reply to Katrina13

Thank you so much. Will look into this further. Have a great week.

My pain is exactly the same - I get a pain in the left or right side of my womb with deep penetration, and sometimes it doesn't even need to be particularly deep for it to hurt. Sometimes I also get pain with orgasm, does anyone else get this? Not all the time, but if I am already in pain orgasm seems to hurt quite a bit. Also pain tends to be worse afterwards. One time I was taken to A&E a few hours after sex :/ But strangely, at other times my pain seems to disappear after sex, but only if it hasn't hurt during if that makes sense. It really helps if I am very relaxed. If I am worried about it hurting, it tends to hurt more.

It is good to talk about with others who know what it feels like. It's very frustrating not being able to just have sex carefree like I used to! I feel as though I am losing part of my role as a partner, even though my boyfriend reassures me that we still have enough sex for him to be satisfied.

To me the pain varies, at best it's like a deep painful ache in my lower abdomen, at its most worst I have been curled up on the floor of the bathroom shaking cause i was cold and scared and sweating profusely, trying to make myself vomit to ease the pressure that's building more and more inside me. Even writing this sends shivers down my spine thinking about it!!!! I'm 23 and have been with my partner for 3 and a half years. Our sex life is pretty much non existent, so much so that I will literally do ANYTHING to get out of doing it. It's heartbreaking to have to push him away but at the same time the pain I've experienced has truly mentally scared me. Before I was diagnosed I went to my previous gp regarding the symptoms an all she said was that it might be because he may have ( and I quote) "a large penis and maybe pushing too much, you might be over exaggerating your movements"! I walked straight out and registered at another gp surgery who took me seriously enough to help find a diagnosis.

It is so good to know not alone in this, the pain on our wedding night two years ago was horrendous and since then not been any better, doctors have been totally useless and one even suggested the pain was from being a newly married couple suggesting she either thought it was our first time intimate together or she thought because we like rabbits! People don't understand and don t want to talk about it and can feel so isolating, I joined online community this morning and just knowing the stuff going through physically and emotionally is SAMe as all the other brave women on here makes me feel not quite so alone x.

on the one occasion after sex my whole uterus contracted so tight t I was sweating and vomiting with pain and I was burning up. I was begging my current partner to take me to hospital as I was so worried he told me I was being silly and asked me to lie down it did ease off after half hour but my god it was the scariest thing I had ever experienced. thankfully not with that partner anymore. my new partner is so much more understanding he knows my body, knows what will hurt and how to be sensitive when I'm having a particularly bad bout. he also let me off with the horrendous mood swings.I am quite limited to which positions are least painful and we make that work for us

hope you get some help from doctor


nickmac1st profile image
nickmac1st in reply to Silker

Hi, im sorry you have to experience this pain too. I wouldn't wish I on anyone. I have been to the doctor lots of times about the pain during sex and he always says the same thing "there's nothing he can do". I'm single at the moment and worry that I will never find anyone because nobody wants a woman with these problems. I've resigned myself to thinking I will grow old alone.

Silker profile image
Silker in reply to nickmac1st

Trust me you wont, i thought the same last year when i was told i wouldnt be able to concieve naturally. i mean who would want a 26 year old baron!! but happiness find you. try to think positive speak to your family and friends have a good winge when you need it, have a good scream when you do and you will find your path xxxx

nickmac1st profile image
nickmac1st in reply to Silker

Thank you Silker!! Mwah!!

That's the exact thing I experience after sex. I am in a new relationship and he is larger and longer than what I ever experienced. So after sex is the worse , I. Feel bloated , I have chills , and sometimes I vomit. I am usually down for days until I get rid of the gas!

I have the same thing sometimes during sex but not all the time. Cold sweats, shaking, feeling like I need to vomit & feeling sick like I'm gonna pass out. To ease this gas pain I normally drink lots of hot tea like peppermint tea, have a glass of prune juice & glass of water with 1tsp of arm & hamer baking soda, then a hot bath as hot as you can bare it. These things normally help ease the pain.


well i go through similar pain, but i have already gone through surgery, apparently your pain is much more. but in generally i am bloated and i feel i have a lot of gas.

yes i do feel pain during intercourse until now. i feel it hitting something inside as if it is the endo and in my stomach, yet it is only instantaneous pain with little bleeding - spotting

I have endo on pouch of douglas, ovaries and stomach wall.

I also get severe pain poohing after my period and me hernia worsens.

This all seems so relevant to what i go through during and after intercourse. Its wrecking my relationship as he thinks its him. Very painful throughout and the following 2 days, my stomach is severely bloated, my whole pelvic area feels bruised and like I've had 5 grown men kicking it in. It also upsets my stomach/bowel that much, I get diarrhea. For 19 years this has been happening. Ive had Laps and other investigation but no endo found. I've finally (through a lovely lady on here) been reccomended a specialist in this area who i have made a private appointment with. Luckily i am covered by my partners healthcare. I'm really hoping for at least a diagnoses, just so it doesn't make me feel like im imagining it! 19 years of pain (not just with sex) & I've triuly had enough.

Good luck to everyone

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